taylor3205 Posted January 14, 2006 Posted January 14, 2006 Well I have given up on all hope of ever getting back with my ex. I have never tried to contact him once I found out he had someone else, that was it, FINAL. I am coping financially, even have a p/t job lined up. I went a bit daft for a while, taking lots of valium and drinking. This has tapered out although I still have the occasional relapse on bad days. I still miss him like crazy, I do still love him I think. I certainly still have feelings, but no where near as strong as they were. Its just very hard when your life is turned up side down. Ive met a couple of people since, but I dont think Im ready and give off the wrong signals. I dont know its hard to explain. I guess I am just lonely and want someone special just like everyone does. It is and has been hard to cope with. I have 4 new friends since we split and have been getting out and socializing a bit more, but my confidence is still rock bottom. I suppose it will come in time. I just hope one day I can return here and tell you all that I am completely over him and that I have some one special in my life. Im sure we will all get there. And I guess nothing lasts forever so enjoy it while you can eh. I am slooooooooooowly getting there I think. Still hurts like hell sometimes though, I still cry and feel so lonely. I am just trying to be as active and sociable as possible. I KNOW I will come out of this a stronger person. Ive just got to keep things in perspective and take each day as it comes. Dont think too far ahead. Thats my plan anyway. Still got a constant dull ache like something is missing though, but thats only because something is.
Astarte Posted January 14, 2006 Posted January 14, 2006 You are very strong already and you'll be even more. You know, like Phoenix and the ashes, you'll rise. Such luck and strength I wish you and look after yourself well...
In Sync Posted January 14, 2006 Posted January 14, 2006 I do remember your earlier posts after your initial breakup...and I'm happy to hear you are pulling through and I'm really happy that you've slow down on the use of drugs to ease you through this. Unless it was so prescribed for health reason, I thought the prescription drug was not helping and definitely the drinking was harmful to your body. It's all so painful these heartbreaks but just know that your breakthrough is an inspiration...it proves to each of us that no matter how terrible something can be...as long as our own hearts beat WE ALL PREVAIL...and there are others via friends near you or on here on LS, that want you will be here to support you. Whatever pain you feel is normal and revel in the beauty that it didn't destroy you..but made you stronger!
Author taylor3205 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Posted January 16, 2006 You are very strong already and you'll be even more. You know, like Phoenix and the ashes, you'll rise. Such luck and strength I wish you and look after yourself well... Thanks astarte , I wish you and everybody else on these boards the same.
Author taylor3205 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Posted January 16, 2006 I do remember your earlier posts after your initial breakup...and I'm happy to hear you are pulling through and I'm really happy that you've slow down on the use of drugs to ease you through this. Unless it was so prescribed for health reason, I thought the prescription drug was not helping and definitely the drinking was harmful to your body. It's all so painful these heartbreaks but just know that your breakthrough is an inspiration...it proves to each of us that no matter how terrible something can be...as long as our own hearts beat WE ALL PREVAIL...and there are others via friends near you or on here on LS, that want you will be here to support you. Whatever pain you feel is normal and revel in the beauty that it didn't destroy you..but made you stronger! True InSync, hope your doing ok? And you sig is true as well 'be your own best friend'. If this break up has taught me anything it is that there is only one person you can 100% rely on for the rest of your life, and that is YOURSELF. Ive been in some bad situations in my life, but I think this one is the worst yet. I became so dependant on him for everything. He was my everything, that will NEVER happen again!!! I will not let it. I will let the right person in if you know what I mean, eventually. Thats if I meet them. Im not even jealous now that he is with someone else. I just hate the sneaky, snidey way he went about everything. Instead of just coming up front and being honest. He strang me along for months both b4 he left me and after and for that I am beginning to dislike him a LOT . The worst part for me [right now] is the loneliness I feel. I mean I do have days when I do miss him as a person. But more often than not its the loneliness. I dont care what anyone says, but when one person is in love with another and that love is reciprocated, it makes you feel good, no matter who you are or what your circumstances are. Everyone wants to love and be loved. When that love is taken away, it can make you feel very bad and disheartened. Good luck to everyone who is going through rough times and heartbreak at the moment. Keep your chin up
In Sync Posted January 16, 2006 Posted January 16, 2006 Hell yeah, I feel the loneliness. I use to think it was him I was missing though, but the more time and distance that has been between us, because of NC-ing, and writing here on LS, I know now, I'm missing the intimacy I had. NOT HIM. Even today I was having aches of longing. It's nothing to feel ashamed of or embarassed...I was to be held and made love to. But I am not going to mix my apples and oranges anymore. He was a scab, and basically not a kind person. Regardless of what physcial contact I had with him, that person is not who I want. I want someone who is capable of loving me back. There period of being alone and loneliness just primes me for choosing a better partner..at least for now that how I'm seeing it.
honda12345 Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 My bf just broke up with me last friday. It hurts like hell. I miss him a ton. But he said he has been outta love with me since last Aug and tried to love me back. But it didnt work. I asked him to gimme one more month to work on my problem. He said its not fair for him to put his life on hold to wait for me. He doesnt want to waste time. He wants to live his live, go to grad school and dating someone. It kinda gave me a feeling that he already has someone lined up. I hope I will never find out if he does. I would be sooooo hurt and jealous. I cannot imagine how you deal with your bf's new gal :-( Good luck
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