Do any guys genuinely find their average looking wife pretty?

[Anonymous]

Most guys i read about say how they used to date hot girls but they had trash personalities so they saw them as ugly and so decided to go for an average wide instead who has a beautiful personality and her personality makes her beautiful. But do any guys just find average looking girls pretty too? Cuz i get personality is important but as an average looking girl myself i want to know if someone would genuinely find me beutiful for not only my personality but also my appearance. Like have you ever seen a girl who was genuinely average but you thought she was pretty even though you didnt get to know her personality yet? And i dont mean the “i think shes average bit shes actually considered pretty by most” kind of average, i mean genuinely average. 

[Gebidozo]

I don’t understand what “genuinely average” means. I don’t think in those terms. Either I like the way she looks, or I don’t. But even on that basic level, there must be some personality traits to attract me.

For example, if a woman looks stern or has a dull expression, I’d probably not feel any chemistry at all, regardless of how well-proportioned her face and body are. If she looks sensual and has an intelligent face, a playful, flirty, sexy expression, a kind smile, then those things might begin to attract me.

On a deeper level, when I’m in love with a woman, I find her irresistibly hot and blindingly beautiful. I absolutely don’t care how she is evaluated by other people.

Yes, looks matter too, but there is no way I’d be attracted to a pretty girl with a boring personality, low intelligence, and especially if she has moral and spiritual values different from mine.

So the whole “hot girls with trash personality” thing completely baffles me. To me, this phrase is self-contradictory. I can never consider a girl with a trash personality hot. And marrying a woman whose looks are just “average” in my eyes seems absurd to me. Marrying the hottest and sexiest girl with a great personality is the only plan that would make sense to me.

 

Edited July 16 by Gebidozo

[flitzanu]

i mean, i see married couples that both are worse than average...well below average....and they seem to be happy and in love.

so, yeah, all sorts of people find each other attractive.

[ShySoul]

There is no such thing as good looking, average, unattractive etc. It's like the saying goes.. beauty is in the eye of the beholder. 

What is considered average to one person will be stunning to another. What one person thinks is "hot" someone else will have no interest in. It's all a matter of individual tastes and preferences. And that's just looking at the superficial side of things. When you really care about and love  person for who they are on the inside, they become more attractive to you on the outside as well.

There is also the fact that what is considered attractive or average varies from culture to culture and changes over the course of time. There is not, and has never been, a consensus on what "average" is and what falls above or below that line.

Just my experience, but the last time I liked someone based on appearance I was in Kindergarten. Since then it's always been their personality that shines and draws me in, making them more beautiful to me on the outside. 

When you love someone, you don't see them in terms of average or not. You see the whole package, and for you, that package becomes the most beautiful person of all - inside and out, no matter what.

[basil67]

I am perfectly average and so is my husband. I love him to bits, but love doesn't make average become pretty or handsome.   It's OK to be average

[justwhoiam]

On 7/16/2025 at 8:23 PM, flitzanu said:

i mean, i see married couples that both are worse than average...

[MsJayne]

When I was in high school there was a girl in our year who was plain, mousy, and almost invisible. One day at a school swimming competition one of our teachers took a photo' of her climbing out of the pool with wet hair slicked back and smiling into the sun, and she looked stunning. You may see yourself as average, but in the right light, at the right moment, you can be beautiful to someone. 

[BaileyB]

Do any guys genuinely find their average looking wife pretty?
 

Goodness, I hope so. If not - what does that say about my marriage… My partner is definitely average.

[Gina2005]

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

[Lotsgoingon]

People date people who they like. Guys can talk a lot of nonsense. Just the way it is.

The truth is guys will fall for a woman who they like, and she doesn't need to be a beauty queen. And who we like is connected to who likes us and connected to quirky preferences. 

The paradox is this: the more you like the person, the better they look. So those guys walking around with "average-looking" women (and women walking around with "average-looking guys) are NOT telling themselves that their partner is so so. They are thrilled to have their partner. 

BTW: this works in reverse as well. Spend 30 minutes with a "hot" (traditionally pretty woman) and guys want to walk away (assuming they are looking for a real relationship). 

And guys do not agree even on who's pretty. 

Go out into the world with confidence. That's all any of us can do. 

 

[Els]

13 hours ago, BaileyB said:

Goodness, I hope so. If not - what does that say about my marriage… My partner is definitely average.

LOL, I was not expecting the last sentence!!! 

Fortunately, I think that for some of us, attraction is more than just appearances. Would H win a Mr. Universe contest... probably not. He is still incredibly attractive to me, because attraction comes as a whole package.

Heck even some of the celebs that I like don't look particularly great in photos. Some of my friends have told me that Benedict Cumberbatch "looks weird"! 

[ShySoul]

On 7/21/2025 at 4:48 AM, Els said:

Heck even some of the celebs that I like don't look particularly great in photos. Some of my friends have told me that Benedict Cumberbatch "looks weird"! 

There have been many celebrities that are supposedly great looking to the general population, yet I look at them and wonder what the big deal is. Then there are people barely anyone knows or gets attention and I'm captivated by. Same applies in everyday life.

Looks are so random. Everyone sees something different. But a good heart is always beautiful.

[longdue]

We usually pair with someone we already find attractive. Over time, that attraction deepens — it’s in the way they smile when they see you, or the familiar scent of their hair that becomes your personal comfort.

Calling someone “average” usually means comparing them to others. Sure, everyone has flaws, but the person you think has no flaws in one area (like their face or shape) might have plenty in other areas — or just be awful to be around. For me, the imperfections imperfections in my partner are some of the most endearing things, like salt in food. Bonus points if only I know them. Even cuter are the things she thinks are flaws, and I’m just thinking, What? That’s actually one of your cute features.

Or maybe it is just me. 

[Gebidozo]

3 hours ago, longdue said:

For me, the imperfections imperfections in my partner are some of the most endearing things, like salt in food. Bonus points if only I know them. Even cuter are the things she thinks are flaws, and I’m just thinking, What? That’s actually one of your cute features.

Or maybe it is just me. 

It’s definitely not just you. I couldn’t have said it better. I feel exactly the same way about my partner. She is the most beautiful woman in the world to me and I’d never think of her as “average”, it’s just insane. When she asks me why I appear to particularly like some features of her that would probably prevent her from winning a model competition, I can only shake my head. Are you kidding me? These features are so you, how can I not like them?

[longdue]

At the risk of TMI, she says “it’s bent but it’s mine “ about an injury I have. I think that’s a perfect statement. Not sweeping flaws under the carpet but rolling with it.