Emergency call on first date?

[MBC87]

Met this woman on Hinge 2 weeks ago and went on really good date that went on for like 4 hours. She showed signs of interest, touching etc, and we kissed at the end. I had a good time at least. Both in our early 30s.

She invited me back to her area for drinks after the initial date plan. I had first asked if she wanted to do drinks around the area we were, but she suggested near hers instead because she wanted to walk her dogs.

After the dog walk we went to local bar in her area. About 15 minutes in, she gets crisis call from friend that her bf broke up with her and she wanted to talk to her about it. I said I understand and whatever, paid for the drinks and she thanked me for the fun date. It went well IMO, I kissed her and said we can do this again sometime.

I never followed up after and neither did she.

Kinda thought it was rude of her to not text afterwords if the emergency was real and that maybe she didn't follow up because the emergency was fake. She definitely didn't need to extend the date, and had a couple opportunities to bail if she wasent into it.

Been a couple weeks now and neither of us even followed up.

Seemed like to diabolical a plan to have a fake emergency come up just for a free Uber or something. We didnt even finish the drink on the extended date. If she wanted to leave, wouldent this be done earlier?

[Sony12]

It's possible it was legit but also possible she told her friend to give her a call so she would have an excuse to leave. Only she really knows. In anycase since you two haven't talked for weeks now it doesn't really matter anymore.

If I had to guess in this situation it was a story they were making up. If she really wanted to stay she probably would have told her she will call her later.

It sounds rude and it usually is but it is something people do quite frequently on first dates.

Edited June 13 by Sony12

[Acacia98]

People do the strangest of things sometimes. I've seen people do convoluted things to end their relationships, for instance, when there were straightforward opportunities for them to do the same earlier. So I wouldn't be surprised if her emergency turned out to be a hoax. 

Having said that, maybe it wasn't a fake emergency. Maybe something happened to her afterwards and she decided that she didn't want to continue dating. Or maybe so much time elapsed that she felt it was too late to follow up. Or maybe she's resentful that you didn't check if she was okay and decided to rule you out based on that. So many possibilities come to mind, and I have no way of knowing if any of them is true...

I'd suggest that, in future, if something similar happens, you just follow up for your own satisfaction. Then, based on whatever answers you get, you can at least put the matter to rest and move on.

[Sony12]

Yeah the easiest thing to do in these situations is to just give them a quick message after the fact. That way you can find out how interested they really are in getting together a second time.

I think the fact that she wanted to go to a place closer to her home to walk her dogs was an indication that she really would have preferred going home to begin with.

[ShyViolet]

I think it sounds fake.  The fact that you never heard from her again after that kinda says it all, too.  If it was a real emergency, I would think she would have texted you something like "sorry I had to leave so fast, but I hope we can see each other again soon".

[Sanch62]

I can't relate to someone who cannot simply tell another, "I'd love to extend this date, but I really can't." There aren't any excuses necessary for that. If this date couldn't woman-up to say something so simple, you're probably better off with a better match.

[basil67]

5 hours ago, Sanch62 said:

I can't relate to someone who cannot simply tell another, "I'd love to extend this date, but I really can't." There aren't any excuses necessary for that. If this date couldn't woman-up to say something so simple, you're probably better off with a better match.

You talk of "women up", but women are very over represented in domestic violence.   We don't know what went down on the date to make her leave like that.  May have been nothing...may have been something.   But if anyone ever feels unsafe, they can use whatever means they have to remove themselves from a situation where they feel at risk.  I would always be available to text a friend about an emergency if she needed an escape

Edited Saturday at 09:06 AM by basil67

[Sony12]

3 hours ago, basil67 said:

You talk of "women up", but women are very over represented in domestic violence.   We don't know what went down on the date to make her leave like that.  May have been nothing...may have been something.   But if anyone ever feels unsafe, they can use whatever means they have to remove themselves from a situation where they feel at risk.  I would always be available to text a friend about an emergency if she needed an escape

The OP mentioned that while she brought up the idea of going to a place to get a drink closer to her home he though initiated the idea of extending the date by going somewhere else. I suspect that she may have just been trying to be nice by going to a second place to get a drink.