cygny Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 oh yeah and here's a little hint---he called you at 11 to see if you were available or maybe 'with someone else'??? so...--if you want him to wonder about whether he 'has' you or not (read: in his back pocket)--maybe think twice about answering so late???? i mean, couldn't he have called you to set up a time to see you in advance???
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 (read: in his back pocket)--maybe think twice about answering so late???? i mean, couldn't he have called you to set up a time to see you in advance??? "Read in his back pocket" what does that mean? What I don't understand is why after his terrible conversation the night before would he want to call me the next day so late!? I don't know what he wanted to tell you the truth...I'm getting to the point where it must have not been important if he was calling me at 11pm.
cygny Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 "Read in his back pocket" what does that mean? What I don't understand is why after his terrible conversation the night before would he want to call me the next day so late!? I don't know what he wanted to tell you the truth...I'm getting to the point where it must have not been important if he was calling me at 11pm. in his back pocket = he thinks you are stuck on him, not a challenge anymore. he can treat you anyway he wants because he 'has' you. i'm not saying this is the case that he thinks this of you--but on the other hand--why didn't he call you early in the evening and spend some quality time together? know what i'm saying? like, if he screws around treating you like this much longer...you will be gone---and that appears to be exactly what you are doing because your self-esteem is pretty high--you don't want to be treated like this, is what i am hearing, and that's great! why call at 11? yes, it was important to him. to see if you will pick up. or are you out doing something else. if you pick up and act all mushy, that is the worst, he has you in his back pocket, so to speak. any time he wants you, you are available to him. but at the same time he's jealous. he doesn't want his 'girl' to be seeing other men. he's afraid you are out doing it to others, as you did to him, ya know?.
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 Your so right.....ewww that's the worst! At first I'm not going to lie!!! I was there...when ever he needed me....now w/ his ignorant conversation it just doesn't matter. Yeah next time I won't answer....
cygny Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 you did well by not calling him back. he was waiting to see if you would.
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 I feel like he was trying to Manipulate with the the whole text "hey babe". I mean I've done it, I'm text him that and he has too and every time I've called he's answered. Or if he doensn't answer a text he would say "i'm sorry I didn't have my phone", or "I'm sorry I didn't get to you sooner". It seemed sweet and honest, yet our last convesation did it.! I mean even if he did want to get a jelouse reaction from me, no that won't work because I'm not an insecure person when it comes to what I want and how I can get it....but, if he wants to know how I feel, dammm it just ask...instead of doing the whole reverse thing? Why do we have to do this to show a guy we like him??? Or are interested? It has to be his age? Or are men like this at all ages? I know not all men are like this?
cygny Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 I feel like he was trying to Manipulate with the the whole text "hey babe". I mean I've done it, I'm text him that and he has too and every time I've called he's answered. Or if he doensn't answer a text he would say "i'm sorry I didn't have my phone", or "I'm sorry I didn't get to you sooner". It seemed sweet and honest, yet our last convesation did it.! I mean even if he did want to get a jelouse reaction from me, no that won't work because I'm not an insecure person when it comes to what I want and how I can get it....but, if he wants to know how I feel, dammm it just ask...instead of doing the whole reverse thing? Why do we have to do this to show a guy we like him??? Or are interested? It has to be his age? Or are men like this at all ages? I know not all men are like this? to answer--i think as men get older they become more sophisticated--so depending on whether they've decided to be an open book or to play the game, they just do it with more determination and skill. about why play the game? Everybody has their own zone of 'emotional space' so to speak--you have it too--and the more you let some one in to yours, the more intimacy you have with them. It is a process of opening up, seeing that you have a chemistry and things in common, then opening up some more. And when someone else lays their cards on the table too soon, before YOU are there at that same place, it's like you are forced into a black and white choice. so you play this game in order to protect yourself and at the same time pull the other person into liking you. it's kind of like a dance or a game of poker. ideally you arrive at roughly the same place emotionally at the same time, and the other person lays his cards down first. think about it--why play the game with someone you don't give a sh*t about? the only reason would be if you wanted to take advantage of them sexually or financially etc.
cygny Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 think about this too. look at guys that didn't play any kind of game with you, and you weren't at the same place as they were emotionally. so they liked you more or differently--maybe they liked you romantically but you didn't feel the attraction-- you may have felt they were clingy, because they were intruding into your emotional space. they were too open with you. it put pressure on you and you wanted them to go away. you didn't feel the same way. it could have been they came on too much too fast. if they had held back and done more 'emotional 4play' with you, you might have liked them as much as they liked you.
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 HAHAHA funny thing is that if he's playing the game to get me sexually well, he isn't because he's not even good at what he does and we haven't even reached intercourse yet , nor oral.... My mistake was ....I love giving...LOVE IT! It's bad I know but, I need to control it...I know that...he hasn't to me at all, I mean not even touched me where I melt....his kisses are intense...I feel it all the way to my toes, but that's just not enought for him to get me give it all up....nope....I noticed that the last time we were hooked up...he just laid there..and well like nothing....I was in shock!!! Then it's like I'm the one that's wrong because I was expecting it!? Oh no...I'm not ignorant.... A REAL MAN...pleases his woman.... So this whole game...he thinks he has...no,....I honestly don't know why if when he's out he probably gets it left and right..... I guess it's the whole I can get them, but why didn't I get her!?
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 think about this too. look at guys that didn't play any kind of game with you, and you weren't at the same place as they were emotionally. so they liked you more or differently--maybe they liked you romantically but you didn't feel the attraction-- you may have felt they were clingy, because they were intruding into your emotional space. they were too open with you. it put pressure on you and you wanted them to go away. you didn't feel the same way. it could have been they came on too much too fast. if they had held back and done more 'emotional 4play' with you, you might have liked them as much as they liked you. Very TRUE!
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