James63 Posted May 15 Posted May 15 Today I asked a girl out but I kind of fumbled because of how high my anxiety was. I had a plan for what I wanted to say but that went out the window when I started talking to her. I had asked out a girl brfore her and I said everything perfectly so why would I mess up if I already did everything correctly that time? What would be some good ways to overcome my anxiety when asking someone out?
Gebidozo Posted May 15 Posted May 15 The first thing to do is to stop fearing rejection. Great basketball players don’t think that they might miss, and when they do miss, they don’t care, they just keep shooting. That’s why they miss less than lesser players. Once you’ve sincerely, genuinely accepted that she might say “no” and that won’t lower your spirits, your anxiety will decrease drastically.
Author James63 Posted May 15 Author Posted May 15 5 hours ago, James63 said: Today I asked a girl out but I kind of fumbled because of how high my anxiety was. I had a plan for what I wanted to say but that went out the window when I started talking to her. I had asked out a girl brfore her and I said everything perfectly so why would I mess up if I already did everything correctly that time? What would be some good ways to overcome my anxiety when asking someone out? So do I just start thinking that I'm going to get rejected when I ask someone out? I'm a bit confused.
basil67 Posted May 15 Posted May 15 2 hours ago, James63 said: So do I just start thinking that I'm going to get rejected when I ask someone out? I'm a bit confused. It depends on how you're meeting them. If you're asking out random women in the supermarket, there's a probably a 97% chance of instant rejection, or just being shown the hand. However, if you're asking out women who you've already met and flirt with, there's a much higher chance of success. Likewise, if it's OLD and they've matched with you.
Gebidozo Posted May 16 Posted May 16 (edited) 3 hours ago, James63 said: So do I just start thinking that I'm going to get rejected when I ask someone out? I'm a bit confused. No. You work on yourself mentally so that you are in a state of mind where you don’t fear rejection. You have to have so much confidence that a potential rejection won’t feel like a failure. Because anxiety is essentially lack of confidence and fear of failure. When you ask someone out, you shouldn’t be thinking anything, you should be in that “zone” like a great athlete, just focusing on the mission and not thinking of whether you succeed or fail. Edited May 16 by Gebidozo
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