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Posted (edited)

Since my partner and I started dating in October every single month they have needed to be away for at least a week or more. I already only get five or six days with them a month because I work every other week and so I only get to see my partner for a few days a month when they are off on the weeks that I'm off. This is hard for a few reasons.

 

  1. It's been 7 months of not getting to see them much and next month they will be gone again for another week or so, and the month after that I won't get to see them at all. Most of these times through reasonable things like classes for work or family trips. Every month tell myself to just focus on myself and then I will get to spend lots of time with them the next month. Then every month there is something else.
  2. They're usually isn't much communication in the way of missing me or talking to me when they are gone. The last time they were gone halfway through I told them I did want them to reach out and call me, I still never got a call until they were driving home. Additionally, every time a new trip comes up, I express but it makes me sad that I won't get to see them on our designated days. They usually respond in a manner expressing that they don't see why it's a big deal while comforting me. I completely understand that a week isnt a bug deal in the vrand scheme of the relationship, however a week or so every month  depelting my time to 3 or 4 days a month every month begins to wear on me. If it is something they voluntarily signed up for like a non-mandatory class they have to pay for it or class they weren't even approved for and I expressed that I would like to have our time the only concern that they express is that they will be disappointed they don't get to go.
  3. They have often expressed since the first month that they can make up for these things by taking extra time off to spend more time with me. However it has been 7 months and the only time I've seen them take off time for me, they slept through it. I think if I ever did see that effort on their part it would make me feel better, especially if I didn't have to ask for it. That would make me feel like they do value my time.

I do not want to break up with them. I love them and we have been through a lot together. It's just that right now and the situation I feel tired and not valued. I'm not sure what a solution is. I do not want to feel terrible for the next 2 months as this continues and possibly after that because we don't know when they're next class is but we know they have one. Please help me all the time I am a priority and they appreciate me and love spending time with me which I understand it's just really hard to feel and the given situation with a given actions. Maybe it would be easier to feel a few months ago but I'm not sure what to do now. Any advice?

Edited by A-connector
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