Gebidozo Posted April 18, 2025 Posted April 18, 2025 16 minutes ago, Sabin said: Perhaps some context would be appropriate to fully understand the types of things that made her angy. One time, we were out at a restaurant of which had a REALLY heavy door. I went to open the door and had to pull pretty hard. I had her feel the weight of the door because of how heavy it was. Later, I learned that she was angry with me because she thought I was trying to embarass her in front of everybody. Just a few days ago, she started getting really mad that she couldn't find her metal straw, and proceeded to have a sudden snappy attitude towards her family. Another time a few months ago, I got chewed out for how I reacted to her having a dream of me cheating. Another thing is that she was always allowed to alter our weekend plans if she had something going on. I would tell her I understand and to take the time she needs. Any time I tried to alter our plans for something important, it was a huge blow up. So while you might say it's impossible for someone to break up over a drawing...I wouldn't put it past her. I think that you aren’t seeing the larger picture here. She has been annoyed and angry for a while. It doesn’t matter whose fault it was. Maybe she is just a toxic person who is constantly irritated over nothing. The point is that the Starbucks cup drawing wasn’t an isolated incident, but part of a broader tendency. Nobody breaks up just because of anger, least of all anger over such trivial matters. The anger isn’t the cause, it is the result of her general dissatisfaction with the relationship. She’s been thinking of breaking up for a while and those anger outbursts were the symptoms of that.
SurfCity Posted April 18, 2025 Posted April 18, 2025 1 hour ago, Sabin said: Being a great listener does not mean being in full agreement. No, the reason I don't think you're a great listener is you don't even know what she said when she was breaking up with you. 1 hour ago, Sabin said: . Later, I learned that she was angry with me because she thought I was trying to embarass her in front of everybody. Just a few days ago, she started getting really mad that she couldn't find her metal straw, and proceeded to have a sudden snappy attitude towards her family. Another time a few months ago, I got chewed out for how I reacted to her having a dream of me It seems like this relationship was dying a slow death anyway. You two don't seem compatible at all so it's hard to understand why you think the argument about the cup broke you up. 1 hour ago, Sabin said: I severely doubt that an employee would purposefully draw genetalia on the cup unless interested in losing their job. I don't find it hard to believe that some guy was willing to risk his coffee shop job to be a jerk to a young woman.
Miss Chrysalis Posted April 23, 2025 Posted April 23, 2025 On 4/18/2025 at 1:13 AM, Gebidozo said: Being dismissive of your partner’s opinion and repeatedly trying to prove them wrong when they are distressed about something is a bad idea. You shouldn’t have argued with her about the drawing. That said, I’m pretty sure that the argument over the drawing wasn’t the cause of the breakup. You probably had some serious relationship problems and the argument was like the last straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back. Agree. Maybe she always feels like you poo-poo her ideas about things. In the future, before dying on that hill, ask yourself, "will this really matter in five years?" If the answer is no, just let it go.
basil67 Posted April 23, 2025 Posted April 23, 2025 4 hours ago, Miss Chrysalis said: Agree. Maybe she always feels like you poo-poo her ideas about things. In the future, before dying on that hill, ask yourself, "will this really matter in five years?" If the answer is no, just let it go. Yep. Sometimes you've just got to smile and nod
SadTexanChick Posted May 14, 2025 Posted May 14, 2025 I stayed with my boyfriend for 3 years and all he did was manipulate and gaslight me. But there's women dumping their men over a blurry, d*** looking star on their Starbucks cup??? I stayed with a felon to try to make it work lmao. You will be fine OP. You dodged someone who would always make you feel like you were walking on eggshells around her, and she would have blown up on you over any disagreement eventually.
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