Guyster Posted April 7 Posted April 7 (edited) I started dating this woman about 5 months ago. We meet online, she reached out to me first. It started out as a very slow relationship, slow communications etc. Since then the communication has gotten a lot better, we talk more and she seems to be making more and more time for me. She works a lot and also has kids, one of those kids is 9 and the other is a teenager so she is limited on time and has things she has to work around. We have been intimate now for about the last 3 months. She has been widowed now for about 7 years and said she had not had any relationships or been intimate within that time frame. I had no reason not to believe her and really could care less as that would have been before I met her, so would not have been an issue. The information I'm starting to piece together now is she seems to have a really good male friend that does some work for the company she works for. I'm not sure how often he is at the store she works at but I would assume a few times a month. Apparently she has known this guy for a good while, probably even before she was widowed. When she first mentioned the guy, she said she went to high school with this guys wife....and the way I took it based on the way it sounded at the time, was she was good friends with the wife and assumed that is how she had meet this guy. But since that time I do not think she was good friends with the guys wife, she just knew the wife from school. When she first started talking about this guy friend to me, she made it sound like he is the one that pushed her into getting out there and dating someone. She also said that sometimes he makes inappropriate comments but she made lite of it. One morning we were texting back and forth before we both had to go to work and I received a text from her that did not flow with anything we were talking about, it was way out in left field. I asked her if that text was intended for me and she said it was. It wasn't a bad text or anything, just did not flow with our conversation....and the way she acted afterwards trying to defend the text it really made me start questioning things. I would have to be a complete fool to think that text was for me as it had nothing to do with our conversation. After the way she acted about the text, I did question her more about her guy friend as I just had a bad feeling about this guy. I asked her what kind of inappropriate comments this guy has made in the past...since she did say he had made inappropriate comments, and she said she did not remember making that comment and said he hasn't said anything inappropriate before. Her communications are up and down.....meaning there are days I talk to her and she will tell me im the first thing she thinks about when she wakes up and the last thing she thinks about when she goes to bed and will text all day long. Other days its as if she could care less if we talk or not and does the bare minimum to communicate. I know she is widowed and it would be hard dealing with that in your life, but being single/non intimate for 7 years is questionable. She is an attractive person and works around a lot of different people. But at some point when you have questions based on things that don't seem to add up, you do start questioning things within yourself about someone. I just have a gut feeling she has been in a sexual relationship with this married guy friend and since he is married, that is why she would not admit to being in a relationship since the time she has been widowed. She now makes it sound like the only time she talks to the guy is business related when he comes into where she works....but early on when I meet her she made it sound like he was a really good friend. I guess my point of this post is....if she did have a sexual relationship with this guy, she will never tell me about it. If she did have a relationship with him, I don't think she has fully moved on. My gut feeling, based on things I have pieced together and just by her actions, tells me she was more involved with this guy then she is telling me. I know she likes me, she has never canceled on me, seems to be putting in effort to see me....but still seems to be lacking in some areas and it makes me feel, if she was involved with this guy, she is having issues moving on....I just know something is holding her back. I would feel terrible if she is on the up and up....but at some point I have to trust my gut or at least try to get some clarity on things that don't seem to add up. Im just hoping to get some insight and opinions from others. Edited April 7 by Guyster
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