Could he be the one?

[babybear]

I've been dating my bf for a little over 3 years now. After about a year, we broke up for 6 months. He initiated it b/c he basically wanted to screw around. I was SO upset! He didn't even have feelings for someone else...he just wanted to screw around and be single. We ended up getting back together eventually, and when we did - we were both different people. I got myself together, and he got himself together. I am in medical school now, and he is a successful business-person. BUT, when he broke up with me, I was so devastated. I hit rock bottom...took a semester off from school...didn't socialize much. It was really sudden, and really crude and insensitive how it all unraveled. It really was a dark time b/c of other things that were also going on in my life. I still hold that resentment towards him b/c I feel like he just dropped me for the single life when I needed him. And I told him over and over not to break something beautiful. Honestly, I couldnt ask more from a man now than what he gives to me. He is beautiful, caring, thoughtful, loving, and my exact complement. But, I see where I am today - and I can't help but remembering all the pain I felt from him, and I guess I am sort of angry. He talks about getting married all the time, and in my head I'm thinking - well, now that I got it together and am going to be a doctor, and have a solid future, I suddenly look SO appealing. In my heart I know I could be a plumber and he would still love me the same. But, I just feel like it's all a little unfair how you can drop someone so easily, and then actually get them back - and really lose nothing...while I went through a lot. Just life...and relationships, I guess. And it makes me wonder if I can put this aside and marry him afterall. Anyway...what do you guys think?

 

Babybear

[mel777]

I think if you took him back you need to forgive him and let it go. If you can't then you need to let him go, it's not fair to either one of you to hold on to the past.

[cygny]

if he dropped you once so easily who's to say he won't do it again? you know he has it in him...and that's why the resentment is there but also the fear of trusting him. there is really no way to forget that this ever happened. if you go forward with him you might be able to control your resentment and push it to one side but the relationship is never going to be the same as it was before so you have to decide if you want that.