CaliGuy Posted January 27, 2006 Posted January 27, 2006 Well all.....I almost don't want to tell you.... I responded....shes sent two messages, and I guess it finally got the best of me. Hope that it doesn't kill the cat. I dont feel let down with myself....more curious then anything NE "These scars will make me sick, so I'll give up you this, i'll give up on you" If it gives you closure, great. If she gives you false hopes, back to square one
BrotherD Posted January 28, 2006 Posted January 28, 2006 You're still weak, RED ALERT! If she says anything else other than "I love you , I miss you and you doinked me the best that anyone ever has. I cannot live without you...) you will be dissapointed! Trust me on this one. Now here's the hard part. Sometimes people need a "green light" to move forward. Alot of NC skirmishes are because each party is in their corner with their arms crossed. If you really want to talk to her (and give her the green light) I'd reply. But! Set yourself up with no expections. In fact rehearse over and over what the conversation most likely will be "Hi, was thinking of you because my boyfriend's in Iraq..." or something as hideous as that... If you can handle that and in hopes of "green lighting" her, great. If you can't handle (and you and I know you can't) NO CONTACT!!!!!!
LIFEISCRAZY Posted January 28, 2006 Posted January 28, 2006 You know its funny because the same exact thing just happened to me too. I had NC with her for like 6 months and out of no where she calls me and asks if she can talk to me and ask me questions and we talked a little. Then out of nowhere she asks if we can be good friends. I thought about it a lot but I ended saying yes. Now she is supposebly in Love with someone new and that makes me wonder why call me. But you see I guess a lot of us think that they call us after so long to get with us but really since they have moved on they just want to see how you were doing. So we sometimes really need to ask ourselves "Why did they REALLY call us or im'ed us". Well Im going through the same as you but this is what I can TRY and advice to you.
Author NightsEcho Posted January 29, 2006 Author Posted January 29, 2006 Hey all..... More to update and more to tallk about. Firstt things first....thank you to each and every one of you who have taken the time to reply and post on this. Your outpour has made me question and challenge how I think and I really appriciate that. I sent her an e-mail, nothing deep, just saying school is good, how my friends were and thats it. She sent one back a week later, in a friendly tone, and just kinda went on....not about us, but "things" in general....no mention of a bf ...not that I wanted to know. In september, she told me she found someone that made her happy, thats when we entered NC. Well I sent back a SHORT reply....and now in like 2 days she responded again.....still friendly and nice, but not really volunteering much as to why after 5 months shes back..... I dont know why she is doing this....fishing, back together, friend trap, down on herself.....i must say she plays this game very well lol Anyway.....I'm almost at the point of asking why.....I'm not picking on people here....but I read posts from kodiak and others and I dont need to get sucked back into pain.....I also must add....I have a gf of about 2 months and this is all something I dont want to bring on her I guess my ex, I still love her.....which is why i'm trying to use my head and not my heart NE
Lishy Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 If you was using your head sweetie you would block her ass and not talk to her!
CaliGuy Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 Hey all..... More to update and more to tallk about. Firstt things first....thank you to each and every one of you who have taken the time to reply and post on this. Your outpour has made me question and challenge how I think and I really appriciate that. I sent her an e-mail, nothing deep, just saying school is good, how my friends were and thats it. She sent one back a week later, in a friendly tone, and just kinda went on....not about us, but "things" in general....no mention of a bf ...not that I wanted to know. In september, she told me she found someone that made her happy, thats when we entered NC. Well I sent back a SHORT reply....and now in like 2 days she responded again.....still friendly and nice, but not really volunteering much as to why after 5 months shes back..... I dont know why she is doing this....fishing, back together, friend trap, down on herself.....i must say she plays this game very well lol Anyway.....I'm almost at the point of asking why.....I'm not picking on people here....but I read posts from kodiak and others and I dont need to get sucked back into pain.....I also must add....I have a gf of about 2 months and this is all something I dont want to bring on her I guess my ex, I still love her.....which is why i'm trying to use my head and not my heart NE She'll tell you when she is ready to move forward. In the meantime, don't respond much other than in a polite, friendly, non-personal kind of way. And make sure you wait at least a week to respond
Author NightsEcho Posted February 5, 2006 Author Posted February 5, 2006 Hey all, I think I finally get it. Like she has been fishing just to make her lonely days out there where she moved easy. SHe doesnt genuinely care at all. Her questions about my life are hollow. I just realized this needs to be cut off. I didn't realize that it was affecting me.....and then I had a dream about her! I havent dont that in 6 months. Guys, dont play this game. I'm using my head now. Not bringing myself down....i'm not ruined.....just I know what an empty shell this whole process is. NE
dprelz Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Block her or delete her. Make it so the only way she can contact you is by going to your house and seeing you in person. And the only way she will do that is if she wants you back. This will take out all the questions that come to your head when you guys do have contact. It's a waste of time, all your going to do is wonder, so just take that trouble out of your life.
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