mattea Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 i've been dating someone for a couple months. i'm starting to develop feelings for him, but i'm concerned that we don't really communicate the way i want to. there's a couple things that i want to talk about with him, but i'm wondering if it's too early to bring these things up? one issue is that i'd like to meet some of his friends. he talks about his many friends to me very often, but i haven't met any of them. when we spend time together, it's almost always been just the two of us. i enjoy that, but i want to make it broader. i feel like meeting his friends and seeing how he is around them will help me get to know him. in most of my relationships i've met my boyfriend's friends early on and they've met mine. i did introduce him to some of my friends, and now i've started to feel like maybe there's some reason he doesn't want to introduce me to his. i don't want to assume anything about why - maybe he's just not comfortable making introductions until he's been dating someone longer or the relationship becomes more serious? the other is that i am in a place in my life where i do want a relationship/partnership. in the past i've not felt ready or able, and i've dated more casually. of course after a couple months i don't yet know whether he's someone i want to share my life with, we're still getting to know each other. however, i don't want to develop more feelings for him if he's not even interested in a relationship at this time. i'm worried about bringing these things up in such a way that he doesn't feel i'm trying to rush us into some serious relationship overnight - i just want to know where he's at and his approach to relationships. is it too soon to start talking about all this?
slubberdegullion Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 we don't really communicate the way i want to. Communication is at least a two-way street. Getting him to change so he only communicates the way you want to isn't going to happen. one issue is that i'd like to meet some of his friends Then tell him that. Unlike Kreskin, he's probably not a mind-reader. i am in a place in my life where i do want a relationship/partnership Excellent. As you and he get closer, this feeling will likely become even stronger. You can talk to him about it if you wish, but I'd be more inclined to let things progress naturally. Actions, it is said, speak louder than words, so by being aware of his actions and the feelings behind them, you'll get a pretty good idea of where he is. Good luck!
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