Author Woggle Posted January 10, 2006 Author Posted January 10, 2006 Well LINDYA....he can either listen to the females on LS and lose his woman or he can listen to me and keep her around. It is WOGGLE's choice. Normally I would agree with you but she is not the typical woman. She actually likes my nice side and doesn't want to see anymore of my jerk side. That is why I don't want to ruin it with her and why I apolgized.
cygny Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 but wouldn't already assuming she was going to 'act up', and warning her not to forget that he doesn't need her indicate bigger problems than just how it is worded? why does woggle need to set boundaries with this chick? is she already crossing the line? has she "acted up' already? by the way, what do you mean by 'acting up'?
SmoochieFace Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 why does woggle need to set boundaries with this chick? Are you kidding me? Self-respecting people should set boundaries no matter what so that they aren't walked on. That was why my marriage and all my previous relationships were shyt - I allowed women to walk all over me because I didn't set any boundaries and also because I had no self-respect. Those days are finished.
Author Woggle Posted January 10, 2006 Author Posted January 10, 2006 By acting up I mean constantly angry with me and screaming at me. My ex used to kick me out a few times a year and each time I would come crawling back. I was wrong and if I have to play these games with a woman just for her to act decent I don't want her. Luckily I don't think she is like that.
lindya Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 So if you can prove to me that you have more experience dealing with women romantically than I do then I will stop dispensing my advice. I'm inside a woman 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Beat that.
cygny Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 Are you kidding me? Self-respecting people should set boundaries no matter what so that they aren't walked on. That was why my marriage and all my previous relationships were shyt - I allowed women to walk all over me because I didn't set any boundaries and also because I had no self-respect. Those days are finished. smoochie no offense but you sound like you have a chip on your shoulder. my experience with men like this is that I end up wanting to test them (just like with players, i just end up wanting to play them back). i'm not saying be a wuss with no boundaries, but there is a middle healthy ground of projecting strength without being a pussy or an a**hole. if everything is going well, i don't think one needs to make big statements and threats. actions speak louder anyway. only when people are testing you or crossing the line do you need to give a warning or better, become unavailable. that's why i am asking if she's done something.
cygny Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 By acting up I mean constantly angry with me and screaming at me. My ex used to kick me out a few times a year and each time I would come crawling back. I was wrong and if I have to play these games with a woman just for her to act decent I don't want her. Luckily I don't think she is like that. ok but why not just walk away if she does this?
SmoochieFace Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 i'm not saying be a wuss with no boundaries, but there is a middle healthy ground of projecting strength without being a pussy or an a**hole. I don't think Woggle is being either... he's just doing what's right for him. Apparently, he's having second thoughts about it though.
cygny Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 I'm inside a woman 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Beat that. i'll second that. i've canned more players like alpha in the last few years than i can count. does that constitute proof?
Author Woggle Posted January 10, 2006 Author Posted January 10, 2006 ok but why not just walk away if she does this? It's what I should have done with my ex and I finally did when she cheated. I need stop judging all women based on that experience though. I don't want to ruin this.
cygny Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 I don't think Woggle is being either... he's just doing what's right for him. Apparently, he's having second thoughts about it though. whatever, if that's right for him. but then he must accept the consequences for his insensitivity.
Mz. Pixie Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 I wouldn't know if they did or not. All I know is, IMO, Woggle's GF didn't need to wig out over his comments. If she isn't the mistreating type then she has nothing to worry about and she should have just let Woggle's comments roll off her back. Well, you can let something roll off your back, once or twice or perhaps three times, but how many times can you hear it without it pissing you off? Especially if you're nothing like that to begin with? My husband told me ONE time that I needed to know that he would never tolerate me being unfaithful and that I needed to know that things would be over between us if I ever did that. That's all I needed to hear it, because that goes without saying as far as I'm concerned. He said if I were willing to give up the best thing I'd ever had, that would be on me and there would be nothing he could do to stop me. Know what?? He's right. No one wants to hear someone go on and on about how "You better not mistreat me blah blah" You spend so much time worrying about that happening that you don't focus on the actual relationship!
cygny Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 It's what I should have done with my ex and I finally did when she cheated. I need stop judging all women based on that experience though. I don't want to ruin this. good. i'm glad you realize this.
SmoochieFace Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 Well, you can let something roll off your back, once or twice or perhaps three times, but how many times can you hear it without it pissing you off? Especially if you're nothing like that to begin with? Uh, well, reading over Woggle's posts in this thread I don't get the impression that he constantly does this to his GF...
JS17 Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 It's what I should have done with my ex and I finally did when she cheated. I need stop judging all women based on that experience though. I don't want to ruin this. If you don't stop putting 100% of the blame for the failure of your relationship with your exw and start looking at yourself to see where you made mistakes then your current relationship is sure to fail. People don't throw their spouses out of the house or have affairs for no reason.
Mz. Pixie Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 If you don't stop putting 100% of the blame for the failure of your relationship with your exw and start looking at yourself to see where you made mistakes then your current relationship is sure to fail. People don't throw their spouses out of the house or have affairs for no reason. I've preached this to the rafters and he still disagrees so I finally quit.
alphamale Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 I'm inside a woman 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Beat that. so what? unless you are lesbian you most likely have zero experience dealing with woman romantically.
SmoochieFace Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 People don't throw their spouses out of the house or have affairs for no reason. That is true but why can't it be a reason that has nothing to do with their spouse? Aren't some people just selfish and mean period and would cheat even if their spouse is a saint? Why suggest that Woggle may have had a role in the demise of his marriage when there is the possibility that his XW may have just been a *bad seed*?
loony Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 That is true but why can't it be a reason that has nothing to do with their spouse? Aren't some people just selfish and mean period and would cheat even if their spouse is a saint? Why suggest that Woggle may have had a role in the demise of his marriage when there is the possibility that his XW may have just been a *bad seed*? Because everybody is seeing that Woggle has problems with empathizing and he constantly fails to understand people. We are concluding that when he's like this with us, he also treats other people who are close to him the same, which is not good and a potential source of many problems.
alphamale Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 We are concluding that when he's like this with us, he also treats other people who are close to him the same, . I don't thinks so LOONEY...what people say and do on an anonymous internet forum and in real life are two totally different things.
loony Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 I don't thinks so LOONEY...what people say and do on an anonymous internet forum and in real life are two totally different things. You're not going to tell me that in real life he suddenly understands people better, are you?
SmoochieFace Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 Because everybody is seeing that Woggle has problems with empathizing and he constantly fails to understand people. We are concluding that when he's like this with us, he also treats other people who are close to him the same, which is not good and a potential source of many problems. That still doesn't discount the possiblity his XW would have still cheated on him for her own selfish reasons. She may have done it regardless of Woggle's behaviour.
JS17 Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 Relationships are never 100% one person's fault.
SmoochieFace Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 Relationships are never 100% one person's fault. So you are saying that if a woman cheats on her husband because she is a woman with *loose morals* and has no regard for her husband and he is a faithful spouse then he STILL is at fault to a degree and is to blame for her actions? I dunno... I guess in order to accept your postulation one would have to believe that all people are basically good. I just don't buy that. I think there are some people who are truly bad and that they should bear total blame for some things. *shrugging*
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