Darkwall Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year. We both love each other and agree our relationship has blosomed so quickly. We've made a surprisingly fast connection. A few months ago, for his birthday, I totally spoiled him with lots of great gifts, attention, a special dinner (prepared by me by candlelight) and a big bash with all his friends. I did this because I love him and knew I would make him feel amazing. He said it was the best birthday to date. However, just a week ago for my birthday on new years eve he cheaped me out. I made his first bday together with me sooo memorable and was hoping he would make my first bday with him as memorable. Man, was I wrong. In his defense, he did bring me beautiful flowers. His gift to me was pajamas which was given to me in front of his family. I only learned the next day those pajamas were from him. Where is our special time together? How have I been spoiled or how romantic is this for that matter. He says we did celebrate on new years eve. I disagree, I planned the evening and payed my own way in. How's that him celebrating my bday? I believe he should have done something more special. I feel so ripped off. I feel like I didn't have a birthday. He thinks i'm passing blame for having to share my bday with new years. It's still hurting me. My problem is what do I do about it. Am I expecting too much? Does he care? It sure feels like he doesn't. He says he didn't know that's what i was expecting and now he knows that this is how we get to know each other. BS. This is a time where you show your true feelings. He thinks it takes time to learn these things about one another. I think he's using time as an excuse. Isn't it only normal for couples to celebrate alone or in a more special way? I thought so. What's time got to do with it?! JIPPED
BlacknessOfSleep Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 Sounds just like my boyfriend..and yeah, he is being a cheap boyfriend. Maybe he has reason? Or maybe he doesn't. Our second anniversary is this week and my boyfriend doesn't have ANYTHING...not even a few dollars to pay for gas to get us to a decent place. I spoil him on his birthday (bought him the guitar case he's been looking at for 2 years, got him a beautiful ring for Christmas, etc. I can't even remember what he got me for my birthday and all the things I got for Christmas broke because they were cheap. At least he remembered your birthday though. Valentine's Day is coming up. Give him one more chance for a good day...tell him you're not going dutch like on your birthday...HE WILL PAY (for the date, and he will give payback for those pajamas...) Guys are naturally retarded when it comes to gifts, so drop some hints. Or if you want to be really direct, chew his a$$ out for being so cheap when you threw yourself into his birthday to make him happy.
slubberdegullion Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 Guys are naturally retarded when it comes to gifts, so drop some hints. Nonononono... Don't drop hints. Give us details. Where. What size. What colour. How much. When do you want it. What sort of wrapping paper you like. What time of day should we give it to you. And who cleans up the dishes.
loony Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 Here, a link to a post that I started about the importance of birthdays: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t78463/
Clair Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 Do you live together? Where did you celebrate the New Year's eve?
mini696 Posted January 10, 2006 Posted January 10, 2006 So just because you went over the top on his birthday, you expect him to do the same? Sounds like high maintenence to me.
Author Darkwall Posted January 10, 2006 Author Posted January 10, 2006 You're absolutely right mini696. It was my choice to go "over the top" and he shouldn't be expected to do the same in return. I know this. We have both discussed this and have moved on about it. Next year, I will probably spoil him again because I'm just generous that way. But, I won't expect more from him. All I was sad about was that those beautiful flowers and my favourite tea could have been accompanied by a little time together. Conversation etc. instead of dashing off to get ready for New Years. That's all. But, now i'm done venting and do appreciate that in every other sense he's better than good to me. Thanks. You made a very valid point. I didn't really see it that way until you pointed it out. Thanks mini696.
Author Darkwall Posted January 10, 2006 Author Posted January 10, 2006 We do not live together. Although we do spend most of our free time together, especially week ends. Be it alone, with friends or family... we are mostly together. We celebrated New years at a banquet hall together with mutual friends and family. P.S... thanks to those who took the time to "listen" and reply.
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