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Woman I've been seeing meets criteria on my list but I'm having a hard time 'feeling it' with her.

Ignore feelings

By Ignore feelings
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Ignore feelings New Member

Ignore feelings

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Objectively she looks good, and I've had a fun enough time going out with her, and values match well, but I'm really struggling to "feel it" for some reason. She used to live close and now lives 4 hours away, which makes it harder to keep feeling it out. Objectively speaking if we had an arranged marriage system and I was arranged to marry her it wouldn't be bad at all, but for one reason or another I'm not feeling super into her. Should I just ignore my feelings and pursue a relationship anyway? I think I'm holding things back more than her at this point. I honestly hate my stupid feelings, at this point, but that's where I am. Basically, I'm not that into her but I think I should be.

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ShyViolet Established Member

ShyViolet

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Why would you think it's a good idea to pursue a relationship with someone who you know you're not that attracted to?  That's just plain disrespectful, wasting another person's time and stringing them along.  It doesn't matter how good they seem objectively or "on paper", if you don't feel chemistry with them, that means they aren't the right person for you.  Don't waste another person's time.

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Gebidozo Established Member

Gebidozo

Posted
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15 minutes ago, Ignore feelings said:

Should I just ignore my feelings and pursue a relationship anyway?

Of course not.

Pursuing a relationship with someone you aren’t genuinely attracted to is disrespectful and unfair to the other person. And it will never bring you happiness or even satisfaction.

 

16 minutes ago, Ignore feelings said:

Basically, I'm not that into her but I think I should be.

There is no such thing as “should” when it comes to feelings. You either feel it, or you don’t.

ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

Posted
Posted
7 hours ago, Ignore feelings said:

Should I just ignore my feelings and pursue a relationship anyway?

I mean, are you that desperate for a relationship? 

 

Miss Chrysalis Established Member

Miss Chrysalis

Posted
Posted
On 1/15/2025 at 8:15 PM, Ignore feelings said:

 Should I just ignore my feelings and pursue a relationship anyway? 

 

What would be the benefit of doing this?

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