Author basscatcher Posted January 12, 2006 Author Posted January 12, 2006 I'm not sure why a thread has to stop if there is still good conversation going on . . . even if the OP has opted out. Pada: I've followed this thread and your other one. So, why can't Mr L help you with bills instead of manicures? What about living with him? (Not something that I'm suggesting. I'm just wondering.) It seems to me that if he really cares for you, he would try to alieviate some of your stress, not add to the laundry that you can't afford to do. Of course, with more clothes, you don't have to wash as often. Who is OP? Other People?a If other people lose interest and don't want to be involved then they don't need to continue entering the thread and reading it.. Thats how I see it. That was the reason for my last post. I am not ready to live with another man. I have done it 3 times since my divorce and its always been disasterous. Charlie is also not ready for that kind of commitment. He has never lived with a woman except when he got married. He has been through some emotionally rough times in the past 4 years so he and I aren't near anything like living together. I surely aint for my mental and emotional health. He was raised a conservative catholic and went to private school his whole life. He wont ever spend the night at my place because my son is there. I don't stay at his place when he has his kids. He shelters them from that kind of lifestyle. He wont drink when they are with him either. He has values and morals.. I won't push myself on him to change them. They are good values and morals... Charlie also lives 10 minutes from his kids and picks them up for school in the mornings and after school. So it is convienent for him where he lives and I live across the river on the opposite side of the metro from him and my son has begged me to not move again. He is in 10th grade and I have moved him so many times the kid has been in 7 different schools since he started kindergarden. He has a good circle of decent friends and he really likes this school and city. He has some issues and I don't want to make them worse by uprooting him again and making him start all over. I can't afford to have my son get his drivers license either because I can't afford the insurance, another vehicle for him to commute if we should move. He can live anywhere and still attend this High School but the commute is not a smart idea and not a option.l. So your suggestions are practical but they aren't good for our situation. I just need to land a better job.
Outcast Posted January 12, 2006 Posted January 12, 2006 I would never recommend that someone start living with someone so soon. They haven't been going out that long. Maybe after a year, but not before. And Pada, OP means 'original poster'. As in you!
Lishy Posted January 12, 2006 Posted January 12, 2006 Lishy, it's Pada who keeps coming back and asking questions so it's to her to decide to quit or not. Outcast I am not reading it like that - I am reading it like Pada is just defending her situation with Charlie not asking questions! Sorry if it was taken wrong!
Lil Honey Posted January 12, 2006 Posted January 12, 2006 Pada: I meant OP as Original Poster. I meant that a conversation could go on even IF the OP opted out. (I didn't mean that you had.) Anyway, I can understand your point about moving in together. I certainly wasn't advocating it. I hope things work out for you.
Author basscatcher Posted January 12, 2006 Author Posted January 12, 2006 Outcast I am not reading it like that - I am reading it like Pada is just defending her situation with Charlie not asking questions! Sorry if it was taken wrong! Sometimes I feel I need to defend because I need to clarify things more. I am the one who spends time with him and see's his actions. Sometimes what we sense and see we can't put into words for someone else to understand. They would have to witness it themselves. I attempt to show the clearest picture possible. So yes it appears I do defend him as well as question things about him.. I read what people say and I form an idea as to what others see based on what they have read and what they also have in their own experiences. A person who still carries bitterness and hasn't healed will be more judgemental then someone who has understood, forgiven and let go of their past pains..
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