rp8387 Posted January 4, 2006 Posted January 4, 2006 hi there. i've got a story that im not too sure how to deal with as it has never come up before. I recently met a girl that moves in the same social circles that i tend to move in. we chatted whenever the opportunity was there. this however wasnt for too long....maybe once a week for one month. she was quite friendly and i liked her. it so happened that there was a dance organised by members of our social group and we were both there. we managed to chat and then proceeded to the dance floor. during the dance, things got a bit hot and she seemed quite at ease with that (initiating lots of stuff by the way). anyway, since things seemed to be looking a lot on the positive side i decided to ask her out for a coffee. to my surprise, she said 'we will see'. anyway, i didnt bother and continued having fun with friends. she then left to go on holiday for a short while and will be back soon. what did i do wrong? and is that like a 'NO' kind of no or is it worth me asking her again. (incidentally, the opportunity will come up again for me to see her) appreciate some advice
NightsInWhiteSatin Posted January 4, 2006 Posted January 4, 2006 Could be 1 of many things: * She could like you but be unsure of whether she wants anything other than friendship and needs some time to do some thinking about what she really wants. * She could have her eye on someone else and is keeping you waiting incase that falls through * She might just like to tease and play games *She might not have wanted to hurt your feelings by saying no and therefore left it hanging instead *She might be seeing someone Can't really think of anything else right now, hope that helps!
itwontdawnsooner Posted January 4, 2006 Posted January 4, 2006 nightsinwhitesatin is right, could be one of many things. its not a definite anything, so its a tease. the motives behind the tease you probably can't figure out unless you talk to her again
Author rp8387 Posted January 6, 2006 Author Posted January 6, 2006 thanks to both of you. thinking about it, if it were a tease, it was a pretty harsh one. even so, without being under the influence and getting really really upclose to a guy....exclusively....for most of the night isnt something that seems like a tease. i dont think she has a bf from what i heard. i did sit and ponder a lot about how to ask her out prior to that..and whamo....there was the opportunity. one more thing i didnt mention was that she was scheduled to leave like 2 days after...can there possibly be something like feeling too rushed?....she is really nice and i do really like her but if course i want to find out as early as possible if i am wasting my time. im thinking though that it may be a bit awkward if i were to talk to her about it. i mean she knows that i am interested in her...but i wouldnt want to seem like a hawk swooping down immediately after she gets back. what kind of tact do you recon i can use?
Lucasarts Posted January 6, 2006 Posted January 6, 2006 just keep talking to her, doesnt hurt to try and just be friends with her usually if theres something there, then it might be building up to something better, since you obviously showed the courage to ask her, then make your feelings more obvious to her when you interact with her. depending on her reactions then you will know where you stand.
voin232 Posted January 8, 2006 Posted January 8, 2006 could be that she felt a little rushed. may also be that you were aiming out of your league. cant say for sure cause i dont know what she looks like but generally as a guy you have to stick to the range of girls that you can most likely get a date from. then there are also the possibilities listed previously. I would try to get out of the mindset of 'being friends' cause thats really easy to do and once youre there, she's out of bounds. cheers
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