Kengne II Posted December 31, 2005 Posted December 31, 2005 I’m a believer… telling you I really believe I’m a believer… even though I’ve never seen I’m a believer… look at my life and you will see I’m a believer… how can you not believe? Wow… to be a believer is truly truly wonderful. I have found peace & solace in religion. Knowing that He is watching after me, and everything happens for a reason according to His plan for my life… I know that nothing – not even the worst thing – can stop me from happiness. I think I can safely say… I have experienced A LOT of heartache in my young life. A cheating ex bf … and then the ‘Other Woman’ being pregnant with my cheating ex bf’s chilld. And though I don’t come from a ‘broken home’ given that my parents are still together… witnessing the degradation of their relationship after cheating on both their parts has provided me with the opportunity to witness a ‘broken marriage’ in full action. I’m not angry though. I’m not a ‘victim’. I just feel blessed. Because through my heartache I have learnt & grown so much as an individual. These experiences have molded me into the person I am today. Sometimes when I read the threads on here… and I see the 21 y os crying out “Help! OMG my ex of 3 mths just broke up with me and I will never ever love again!” … internally I almost smile… because I know the excruciating pain they are going through (and I have gone through) is so unnecessary because it really IS temporary… they WILL love again. The pain WILL go away. How can they not see it? How are we so blindsided by life’s momentary pains that we are unable to visualize life’s future pleasures? I think it’s because we become paralyzed in a destructive cycle of negative thinking that literally deprives us of the ability to own, and thus control our emotions. As a society we have been taught to express our feelings, and not hold back because of the negative consequences of repression. That’s great – but what about the other extreme? OVER expressing our emotions, to the point that they literally control us? Why aren’t we taught to learn to control our emotions? I think some people simply lack adequate emotional intelligence i.e. knowing how to express, handle & control their emotions. I wish there were more threads on here about the power of positive thinking, and positive emotional energy. I think it's possible to harness our emotions to create a positive atmosphere - yes, even in the midst of a painful breakup. It's not easy - but then, what in life is ever 'easy' ? lol. Last... I just want to give a gigantic hug to all those who are hurting right now... Please know that your pain will go away... and please start taking an active role right now in your healing, instead of solely relying on time to ease things... Wishing you all nothing but the best in 2006. K.
Becoming Posted December 31, 2005 Posted December 31, 2005 but what about the other extreme? OVER expressing our emotions, to the point that they literally control us? Why aren’t we taught to learn to control our emotions? I think some people simply lack adequate emotional intelligence i.e. knowing how to express, handle & control their emotions. You're on to something here. I was never allowed to express emotions, so of course I wasn't shown how to appropriately. It may be a generational thing. I had to learn how to name my own emotions as I helped my children name theirs when they were little. Spirituality helps me know what I'm feeling and take some time to think about how I want to express that instead of just reacting and letting the emotions run my life. It helps me know I have the power of choosing how I want to handle those emotions.
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