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Posted

I recently posted how me, 25, and my girlfriend, 23, lost contact after she said she wanted to slow down our relationship. We were only seeing each other for about 3 months, and we have been off for about a month and a half. I am trying to get over her, but I can't. I tried emailing her and calling her a few times in between, but she rarely responded. This helped me get over her because I saw she did not have an interest. Then I see her out at a bar last week and she comes up to me to say hello and offers me a ride to work in the morning; she was being very nice. Of course I didn't get the ride because she never called in the morning. We went home for Christmas and I texted her wishing her and her family well. She responded the next day with some lame response. At this point I realized I was fighting with a lost cause. We didnt talk again until I saw her at the same bar last night. She called my name and I went and said a quick hello to her and her friends. She kept giving me long stares in the eyes and I caught her give a happy smile to her friend as I left to go back to my group. I saw her later in the night, she and a friend came by our area and she was getting pretty cozy and chatty with one guy all night. It really bothered me and ruined my night. I'm not sure if anything happened, but she looked happy. Why can't I get over this girl. Am I holding on to something I have no shot at? This is not healthy for me.

Posted
Why can't I get over this girl. Am I holding on to something I have no shot at? This is not healthy for me.

Yes, stay away from her, it's not healthy for you to continue to have interaction with someone who you feel duress around. If she wanted to be with you she would be. Sometimes we have to get kicked quite a few times to get it through our heads but then we learn cues and try not to make the same mistakes in the future.

Posted

It was a lost cause from the moment she told you she wanted to "slow things down." Since then, you've been analyzing every single contact/encounter you have with her, trying to convince yourself that there's hope. There isn't. None of it means anything. The next time you're at this bar with your friends, you need to focus on striking up some light, humorous conversation with some new ladies and getting a new phone number (or two). You'll get over this girl in time. But, a NEW girlfriend will get you over her much more quickly! And, you'll be much happier.

Posted

I know it is difficult to get over someone, especially if contact is still there. My advice for now is to avoid going to the places where she hangs out at, and to avoid having her in your life. Start meeting other people, just to get your mind off things and do nice things for yourself. Be strong you will be ok.

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Posted

What is making it so hard is that there is still an attraction from both sides. She was telling me things that I wanted to hear from a girl for a long time. I guess I still have the idea in my head that she still believes it. It just hurts to picture her with someone else. You're right though, once I find someone new then my mind will probably be off of her.

Posted

I agree I do not even go to the same mall that my ex frequents i drive an extra 15 minutes out of the way. It is has been worth the drive I promise

Posted

Hi Univ--

 

That girl is being cruel to you! She knows how you like you and she is giving you mixed messages. She is messed up. Some people don't/can't face love when it comes to them. Have NO CONTACT with her and see what happens, but put a time frame on it....like Jan. 31. Then vow to not think about her. Too much thinking about a person can lead to addiction. Get busy, ask out other girls. You are probably a cool guy. People who aren't clear communicators are broken on the inside! You deserve a clear-headed gal!

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Posted

I am trying to avoid her at all costs right now. If she wants to talk to me, she knows how/where to find me. If not, then oh well, I hate to sound conceited, but she missed out.

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