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Posted

On December 22, 2023 10:05 PM I said: Hi Susana, how long have you been on OkCupid, I recently joined, and I am hoping to find someone who is looking for a relationship as seriously as I am.

On December 22, 2023 11:19 PM Susana said "Hiiiii Sunny, I've been here for a while LOL. Started right before the pandemic started then paused for a bit and now I'm back😅. I'm also looking for a long-term relationship. We can see how much we click

What do you like to do for fun?"

I said "I like to watch videos on YouTube and watch movies for fun. Why don't we meet for coffee/a drink? When would you like to meet?"

On December 22, 2023 10:05 PM I said: Hi Susana, how long have you been on OkCupid, I recently joined, and I am hoping to find someone who is looking for a relationship as seriously as I am.

On December 22, 2023 11:19 PM Susana said "Hiiiii Sunny, I've been here for a while LOL. Started right before the pandemic started then paused for a bit and now I'm back😅. I'm also looking for a long-term relationship. We can see how much we click

What do you like to do for fun?"

I said "I like to watch videos on YouTube and watch movies for fun. Why don't we meet for coffee/a drink? When would you like to meet?"

Later the app, which is OkCupid, notifies me that Susana disabled her account so she no longer has an account.

Did I do something that made her not want to continue chatting on OkCupid to see whether we match?

Posted
15 minutes ago, 1_T said:

Did I do something that made her not want to continue chatting on OkCupid to see whether we match?

She wanted to see if you had some stuff in common. You just listed the things you like and didn’t ask what she liked to do for fun. Also it’s possible she didn’t share your interests so wasn’t interested in meeting. Thirdly she may have been chatting with another guy at the same time that she was more interested in.

 

With online dating you can’t really worry about the “why”. Just move on and don’t worry about it.

Posted

I think she maybe wanted to take a break in general from online dating and didn't disable her account specifically because of you. Asking to meet up after just a few messages might have been a little fast for her, but it's impossible to know for sure.

I wouldn't worry too much about it and just keep swiping and messaging other people. If she wants to re-engage with you, she can always message you again when her account is reactivated.

Posted

Nothing to do with you. Nothing. 

Posted

You did the right thing asking to meet after a few messages. Anyone who won't meet in a timely manner is a red flag so it's possible you dodged a bullet.

Please disable and hide dating profiles all the time because they're burned out or met someone. It has nothing to do with you. 

  • Like 1
Posted
8 hours ago, 1_T said:

I said "I like to watch videos on YouTube and watch movies for fun. Why don't we meet for coffee/a drink? When would you like to meet?"

 Kindly, I think you could do well with scrubbing up your self introduction.  What you've written here suggests that you spend all of your downtime in front of screens...now I'm sure that's not true, but it doesn't look good.   Do you play sport/follow a sporting team/swim/gym/read/create/enjoy time with friends/cook/like trying new restaurants/enjoy farmers markets..... give her something to a) bounce a conversation off and b) show that you're interesting.  Thing is, as your response currently stands, you're sounding bland

Then, ask her what she does, and give some follow up discussion on that.  Show her that you know how to have a conversation!

When you've had that basic conversation, ask her out.

Posted (edited)

nothing to do with you...possibly her BF found out what she was doing so she scrambled to get off there, or just wanted to see how many guys showed an interest before her husband got home. Or the ex returned....could be anything. 

Edited by smackie9
  • Like 1
Posted

It sounds like she was just wasting people's time.  It wasn't you.  OLD is full of people like her. 

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