What do i do..?

[Sexylilangel021]

My ex and i broke up over 5 months ago but i can't get over it. We were only together for seven months but lived together for about four. Everything just moved so fast between us from beginning to end. After he moved out i developed a phobia of being alone. I couldn't stand to stay in the appartment because everything reminded me of him. Although he left all his furniture and even his bed for me the place just felt empty. i would go to the park at 1 in the morn just so i wouldn't have to be there. i moved out of the appartment we shared and moved into a house with a friend. It made it a lot easier because i had someone to hang out with. My ex stopped answering my phone calls and stopped responding to my texts so i forced myself to leave him alone. I started drinking and partying alot. I was always hanging out with somebody because i was so scared of being alone. I would stay up all night and go to work tired everyday. I lost alot of weight and it was very noticable because i'm already skinny as is. but anyways my current problem..

 

.. About a month ago my ex and i started hanging out again. We spent a whole entire week together.. sleepovers and all. The first night we stayed up til 7 in the morning just talking and cuddling. He told me he didn't want to sleep because he didn't want it to end. It was the most amazing week ever! We both say we don't want a relationship, we just want to date. He hasn't dated anyone since we've broken up i on the other hand have and still is. He says he wants to date other people but it is so hard for me to accept! I know i am dating right now but i pretty much force myself to go on these dates now that we have been hanging out again. thinking of him with another girl stresses me out so bad! I'm responsible for a lot of the arguing because i fall into such a horrible mood everytime i think about him taking another girl out. He hasn't yet but when he does i just know i'm going to breakdown.we are sexually active and it makes it hard for me to date now. Whats the point. all i do is think about him on the dates anyways. I love him so much, no doubt about that. but with me starting school in less than 2 weeks is it a good idea to go on with seeing him and being stressed out or should i attempt to collect myself and say good-bye again...

[In Sync]

Are you serious? You are allowing yourself to a status change from girffriend to deluxe sleepover?-booty call for a guy who broke it off and you were so torn up that you were out for 1 am walks. Yes cut this poor excuse for teddy bear syndrome loose, gain your self respect and start school with a new attitude. Loneliness will keep people in the most unhealthy relationships and allow people to trample all over our dignity because of this internal fear of being by ourselves. The one person who's company we should love to be with we can't so we become emotional doormats and sex objects. If you get jealous over him dating other girls why would you subject yourself to that situation and day to day angst. That just gives your power over to him. You are admitting that his actions will put you in a negative mood and he (if I understand will continue to date while you still offer to give him the booty) Look at yourslef in the mirror and ask yourself to I deserve this from someone I love or do I think myself unworthy of anything more than being a teddybear-sex partner for him. Because that ain't no emotional love commitment coming from him. Are you familiar with NC. Start practicing it pronto.