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Ex texts me out of the blue, what to do??


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Posted

My ex who left me for a married man 2 months ago, suddenly texted me yesterday out of the blue...

 

"I heard our song on the radio today, miss the fun we shared together in Canterbury (where she went university).Have been thinking about u......wish we could still go out to play, fancy meeting soon? x

 

I havent replied, what should i do?

Posted

She left you, so you don't owe her anything.

 

IMHO, there's nothing to be gained from responding. Keep NC.

  • Author
Posted

I would love to see her again, but also think NC is the best policy, if she wants me she knows where to find me. If i did meet her and she tells me its all going well with her MM it would hurt me again, so i have nothing to gain.

 

If it is all going wrong then that her problem she made her bed she has to lie in it!

 

Does everyone agree this is the right thing to do?

Posted

Decisions...decisions...

 

Does everyone deserve a second chance.... well I think so. However she hasn't made her intensions clear, but she obviously still has feelings for you, although we don't know at what depth. She kept your number..so that says something.

 

She maybe on the rebound, and desperately needs someone like you who she can be with to cheer her up. This maybe the reason she has chosen you. Therefore she is only doing it for her benefit, rather than yours.

 

I think I would reply something along the lines of "Sorry I'm busy, Have a Happy Christmas!"

 

There is no point in being awkward or negative about these things.

Posted

I also agree that you should keep NC.

Posted

NC is only to help you heal! If you want to try to work things out and enter into counceling then I say give her the ultimatum. If she's sorry and wants to work on things then you will speak to her, if not then she should stop contacting you. If you don't want to work things out then continue on with NC.

Posted

Naw, let her stew. I'm sure she has plenty of time to "play" during the times her MM is with his wife and family. If you were to meet her, she'd drop you insultingly quick if he were to call to meet her.

 

She just wants someone to kill time with, someone who still finds her atttractive. Dating a MM is bad for the self-esteem and she probably just wants a boost at your expense.

 

Ignore!

Posted

eh. NC is good if you need to heal, but if itll make you feel better to send the busy text, and ONLY if it will make you feel better and you know you dont have emotions attached, then send it. youre allowed to be selfish at this point. dont have to be mean, just direct. don't meet up.

  • Author
Posted

Dont worry i wont be meeting up, i did reply saying i was busy and wished her a merry christmas.I want her back, but dont want to go and see her and put myself back to square one if she telss me all is fantastic with her MM.Best stay away for now i think.

Posted
Dont worry i wont be meeting up, i did reply saying i was busy and wished her a merry christmas.I want her back, but dont want to go and see her and put myself back to square one if she telss me all is fantastic with her MM.Best stay away for now i think.

I would have said NC is best, but that reply was a good, confident one. Good for you. You showed her you don't need her.

  • Author
Posted

Yes as much as i am desperate to see her, it will be NC from now on, am moving on which will be a shock to her as she thinks i cant live without her!!

 

I will find someone who doesnt run off with any random bloke who tells her he loves her and wants to leave his wife marry her and have kids with her.....yes mate i believe you!!.....and whilst she is awaiting this to happen he is going round hers giving her a good s****ing when he likes!

 

If thats what she wants, then good luck to her!

Posted

You need to know what you want... Maybe you should send one text saying "What are your intentions?"

Posted

I havent replied, what should i do?

 

NC and complete silent is the best way to win over an ex. it will make u stronger and a must better person in the end.:laugh:

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