Madeleine Posted December 13, 2005 Posted December 13, 2005 First of all, a bit of background information. Seven months ago i left my husband of 19 years. Throughout the entire marriage he was physically violent, emotionally abusive, controlling and manipulative. He refused to work so i had to pay all the bills for the last 12 years of our marriage. I have no feelings for him whatsoever and hadn't had for many years. My life is now content and stable, i have a nice home, a good job that i love, and no financial worries. I have a very supportive and close family, many good friends, and a boyfriend who adores me and treats me like a princess. He is one in a million and he means the world to me. Ordinarily, i am a very independant girl and i've always been able to cope with whatever life has thrown at me. I have never been overly emotional or needy or clingy, my husband wouldn't allow me to show emotions of any kind so i learnt to deal with them by myself. However, for the last few weeks i have been an emotional wreck. I keep crying for the stupidest reasons, and sometimes for no reason at all. Nothing bad has happened to upset me recently, i don't feel stressed or unhappy about anything. The only one thing that's been on my mind lately is that i don't understand why my husband treated me so badly when our friends described me as the perfect wife. Surely my marriage can't still be affecting me? I have a nice, happy life now. Why am i so emotional all of a sudden?
JS17 Posted December 13, 2005 Posted December 13, 2005 IMO, the end of your marriage is just starting to affect you. Seven months after a 19 year abusive marriage is just not a lot of time. You need to adjust and rediscover yourself. Have you been in therapy to sort out what has happened with your marriage?
Outcast Posted December 13, 2005 Posted December 13, 2005 You could very well have a case of PTSD, given your marriage past. If your new symptoms don't subside in a few weeks, go see a psych for an evaluation. Humans aren't built to take lots of abuse - it does damage.
Author Madeleine Posted December 13, 2005 Author Posted December 13, 2005 I haven't had any counselling, no. I have talked quite a lot to friends, family and my boyfriend though. All of whom have been very supportive.
JS17 Posted December 13, 2005 Posted December 13, 2005 Outcast is right and having a great support system is a wonderful thing but it's not the same as having a trained therapist. You need someone who can diagnose you and teach you how to deal with the outcome.
Outcast Posted December 13, 2005 Posted December 13, 2005 Your supportive group hasn't the skills to help you learn and use strategies to get over this.
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