CaliGuy Posted December 10, 2005 Posted December 10, 2005 As I sat behind my PC, rummaging through today's email, I started thinking about her. I thought about how things used to be as I normally do when I think of her. Then I started to think about the mean things she did to me. Her quirks, which I used to think were cute, now seemed obnoxious. How she acted towards me these last few weeks, especially last night at dinner (she moved out this morning). Then there was the dirty pictures she took of herself to send to her 'fantasy dream men' she meets online. So as I am sitting there, in my house, without her anymore, it hit me. It was as if God finally said "Ok, I'm releasing you of this pain here and now." The way I felt about her changed, right there and then. It was if I could feel my love for her being drained from my body. Oh, I still love her, but the intensity level has dropped dramatically. I still care about her, but I don't care about the details of her daily life. Why I cared about this insecure, non-communicative, quirky and self-righteous girl, I don't know. Other than her looks (which required heavy makeup) and her body (ok, I admit it's gorgeous, she was a gymnast at one time), she didn't have much going for her. Smart girl, true, but absolutely no common sense. Maybe it was me telling myself I have a great future and if she doesn't want to be a part of it, it's her loss. Maybe it was seeing her kissing another man. I mean, I don't even care that she might be doing him right now. Good luck, buddy, if you only knew what you were in for. Honestly, I believe this could only be God finally giving me what I need to move on with my life: A clean break from her. I'm sure I will have days when I miss her more than others. But at least I can see light at the end of the tunnel where before there was only darkness. Hallelujah.
patwheel Posted December 10, 2005 Posted December 10, 2005 Congrats! At least now she is out of your life, just make sure she will stay out of it! Funny thing you were saying we were in similar situation, I can see it now...my ex also updated her myspace profile with more than enticing pictures of her. As I always said, myspace is a meat market, whoever's actively on it is just there for sex. But yeah, haven't checked in about a month, since that would be breaking NC. Be strong, you deserve a nice girl, who's done looking around, "finding herself" and done with the drama!
slubberdegullion Posted December 10, 2005 Posted December 10, 2005 ...my ex also updated her myspace profile with more than enticing pictures of her. Yea? What's the link?
westernxer Posted December 10, 2005 Posted December 10, 2005 How she acted towards me these last few weeks, especially last night at dinner (she moved out this morning). You took her out to dinner last night?
Moai Posted December 10, 2005 Posted December 10, 2005 That feeling is great, huh? I have the same thing. After a big fight, I start thinking of all the things that happened in the relationship, and suddenly it hits me how lame it was and that I am glad to be rid of her. It's funny how when you are "in it" you can't add it up that way. At least I can't.
Recommended Posts