Aquarius Guy Posted December 5, 2005 Posted December 5, 2005 I feel embarrassed that my wife occasionally cheats on me. I feel fearful of having to explain my wife's occasonal cheating to family,friends or others. So I am trying to prepare some explanaitons, so I can be less fearful, when teh time actually comes, when I have to explain my wife's infidelity. How About: FRIEND: Did you ever think your wife might be cheating on you? AQUARIUS GUY: I have wondered about that. Thank you for sharing your concerns with me. You may wish to keep your supsicions secret, so as to protect the honor of myself and my wife. On the other hand, one of the best ways to stop an affair, is to bring the indiscretions to everyone's attention. Do you see advantages to one approach over the other? Ideas?
JayKay Posted December 5, 2005 Posted December 5, 2005 Is there a reason you continue to stay with her?
lilmoma1973 Posted December 5, 2005 Posted December 5, 2005 Why do you continue to stay? How many times has she cheated on you ? Have you caught her cheating ? I would have to tell her she would have to go if she was going to continue this behavior!! I feel for you because i know what it is like to have been cheated on ...Good luck
JadeStar Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 "When the time actually comes, when I have to explain my wifes infidelity." Are you saying you already know she cheats, or are you preparing for when/if she does? If she already does, you don't need to make excuses or hand out explanations as to why. Thats almost as if you're justifying it to others for her behavior. The second thing is, if shes cheating, why do you feel the need to stay or put up with it? If she has not cheated but you feel she will, you can't live your like that. You can't live based on "what if?" or, "she might, so I better prepare my self." Jade
portableversion Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 because it's none of their business what goes on in YOUR marriage. They aren't married to her, you are. I wouldn't explain a damn thing, and would reply with a "and this is your business HOW?"
Kenyth Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 I got a suggestion for you. Kick her a$$ out the door hard enough that she misses a few steps on the way down the porch stairs!
lilmoma1973 Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 How can you let her continue to treat you this way? She wanting her cake and eat it too !! why do u let her do this to you ? Are you glutting for punishment !!
Kenyth Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 I'm 90% sure this guy is a troll. Either that or his elevator don't reach the top floor. He has another thread even sillier than this one. Try and ignore him until he starts to make sense.
RecordProducer Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 FRIEND: Did you ever think your wife might be cheating on you? The correct answer: No. Feel free to tell anyone who's nosy that it's none of their business and you're unwilling to discuss it with anyone apart from your wife. Now regarding her, I don't think you should worry about how to eloquently express your feelings, but to solve the problem or divorce. I would recommend individual therapy in any case for you, dude. Hope you're not a troll.
Author Aquarius Guy Posted December 6, 2005 Author Posted December 6, 2005 Dear Kenyth, Not everyone is going to identfy with my thread, my pespective or my feelings. If you don't have feelings or ideas to add, then I would just as soon you took your negativity someplace else. Calling someone with a problem a troll is unkind. If you have ideas, fine. If you just want to be unkind, there are plenty of other threads to pick on. You did offer one suggestion, separation. It would not be difficlut for me to move out. I am trying to get the positives in place as much as possible, before I give an ultimatum. I am working on the phrasing of the words, so I have my feelings in line with my words. Thank you.
Kenyth Posted December 7, 2005 Posted December 7, 2005 Auquarius Guy, Well, now you're making some sense. I'm sorry if I offend, but you're posts were a little "off" to me. They seemed more like a joke than a serious issue. Your other post in particular struck me this way. You must understand, many people make false posts in order to make fools of people trying to answer and help. Perhaps I just didn't understand you correctly. Please ignore my previous comment and proceed.
RecordProducer Posted December 8, 2005 Posted December 8, 2005 I'm sorry if I offend, but you're posts were a little "off" to me. They seemed more like a joke than a serious issue. Your other post in particular struck me this way. You must understand, many people make false posts in order to make fools of people trying to answer and help. This is true. We've had a troll who kept posting ridiculous threads and even created a false account with my name just to play with me - he thought he harmed me in some way. In any case, you should ask yourelf why your situation sounds so ridiculous - it's because you seem to accept her cheating as a normal thing and all you care about is what to tell her or your friends and family. We don't know you so we're trying to understand why you accept this kind of treatment. Is she a famous actress while you're her gardener? Is she beautiful, smart, and rich and you're nobody? Do you depend on her financially? You can't let her go because you love her although you know she doesn't love you? Does she have a personality disorder that you tolerate? Do you have it? Does she blackmail you? Is she really a cheater or are you extremely jealous and suspicious and accuse her of something you're not sure about? Your atitude is really weird and what you put up with doesn't promise any happiness for you in the future. Perhaps if you would explain WHY you're taking her crap, we could advise you more constructively. Until then I (and probably the rest of the people here) will agree that her behavior is unacceptable and she doesn't really love you.
Author Aquarius Guy Posted December 9, 2005 Author Posted December 9, 2005 Update: I probably appeared wimpy as I was collecting my thoughts. Thanks for the responses. Here is a link to another thread, where I formulate a plan and take action. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=645588&posted=1#post645588 Questions?
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