sick of it Posted December 3, 2005 Posted December 3, 2005 If the guy never cheated on you. Never lied to you. Promised how he would do the things that needed to be fixed. Made some serious changes and sacrifices to be with you. Why would you not give him a second chance? youve been together for a long time. you have a long history. youve never broken up before. its not your feelings that have changed. hes showing you more emotion than youve ever seen. what are the reasons you wouldnt believe him or give another chance. btw, youre not interested in anyone else (so you say). have any of you ladies done this? explain why.
Kengne Posted December 3, 2005 Posted December 3, 2005 If the guy never cheated on you. Never lied to you. Promised how he would do the things that needed to be fixed. Made some serious changes and sacrifices to be with you. Why would you not give him a second chance? youve been together for a long time. you have a long history. youve never broken up before. its not your feelings that have changed. hes showing you more emotion than youve ever seen. what are the reasons you wouldnt believe him or give another chance. btw, youre not interested in anyone else (so you say). have any of you ladies done this? explain why. I'm sorry, but I believe your ex gf is lying to you. You sound like my 1st ex-bf. Almost perfect, willing to do ANYTHING to make our relationship work. I lied to him when I said there was no one else involved (there was - but I didnt want to hurt his feelings) BUT at least I was honest w him in saying it was me, not him (i.e. MY feelings had changed). I would not give him a 2nd chance because SIMPLY...my feelings for him had died. Nothing wrong with the relationship itself, but once the feelings are gone thats it for me. I will not work to rekindle a stone cold dead fire. I believe this is the case with you ex-gf. You need to accept what she is saying, read between the lines and let her go so you can move on. Time to go into NC. Good luck! K.
jh28wd40 Posted December 5, 2005 Posted December 5, 2005 This just happend to me 6 months ago, three months after moving into our apartment together my ex gf found a guy at her job to start playing with. She got real distant did not want to touch me anymore, never showed affection and started fights, and then blamed them on me.. She gave me the BS there was no guy involved, i knew she was lying but... The guy worked with my dad and her, yeah she did not even respect me enough, not to screw someone that worked with my dad and her! She made me believe it was all her, which was cool, but the bs about the other guy i had already called her on. She was deleting phone numbers she last dialed. Sleeping with a cell phone under her pillow,.. And where i screwed up was I lost my Temper, and yelled which gave her more ammo to throw reasons why she wanted away; she drunk like a sailor but i stuck through it. well after i left my aprtment that I got with her, I wake up every day at my parents house, wondering why did i feel so guilty to leave my apartment like I did, she did not deserve it. but now she is reaping the awards of cheating on me.. Not only that, it was a damn nice apartment , was my first. I get very angry still 6 months later just because the apartment. She made me feel she just needed to space, but she made me feel guilty because she had no where to go. I felt guilty, and left that all that matters, but i hurt just knowing she is living in what i helped get, and she just does not feel gulity. Last time i ever talked to her, she told me I was the worst boyfriend she ever had, and that I caused her to do everything she did to me. But i never once yelled at her until the end, when I got hurt. I bought her anything she wanted, always massaged her feet.....etc She was my first girlfriend. at age 23 we was together a year.. A now i'm just plain scared to trust a woman again.
steffany Posted December 5, 2005 Posted December 5, 2005 And I agree with sick of it. She may have someone else or someone else in mind. Maybe not. Doesn't really matter. Just stop being so available and willing to change for her. Be you...be proud of who you are...don't be so quick to make changes to yourself
AltplanB Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 Same situation. Didn't do anything wrong, she just changed her feelings. Im waiting to find out if she might change her mind again. I know its stupid but i love her and i cant let go until i am absolutely sure that she has no feelings for me anymore. Oh well, love may hurt but now i know to respect it more when its there.
AriaIncognito Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 I broke up with my boyfriend of 1 year, last wednesday. He was a nice guy. Treated me well. Didn't cheat. Etc. But just because they dont cheat and they don't treat you like crap, doesn't mean the two of you are compatible. He and I, while we had fun going out and whatnot, just wanted completely different things out of life. Things like that happen. Or, people can just fall out of love, or grow apart. Either way, it doesn't mean either party did anything to wrong the other, it's just, life. He and I broke up once, and got back together (back in April 2005), and well, there was a lot of talking of improving the way he looked at certain things, and me too, and neither of us really did it. I think if you're making someone change, you're making them become someone they might not be. While they might be good at it right now, they could slip back into their old ways. Instead of giving him another chance, give someone else, a first chance. Jennifer
FataMorgana Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 I'm sorry, but I believe your ex gf is lying to you. You sound like my 1st ex-bf. Almost perfect, willing to do ANYTHING to make our relationship work. I lied to him when I said there was no one else involved (there was - but I didnt want to hurt his feelings) BUT at least I was honest w him in saying it was me, not him (i.e. MY feelings had changed). I would not give him a 2nd chance because SIMPLY...my feelings for him had died. Nothing wrong with the relationship itself, but once the feelings are gone thats it for me. I will not work to rekindle a stone cold dead fire. I believe this is the case with you ex-gf. You need to accept what she is saying, read between the lines and let her go so you can move on. Time to go into NC. same situation for me as well. K summed it up really well. People move on, change, so do feelings expecially after a while. Don't need to do anything specifically wrong for them to go. sorry to hear, but sounds like you should try to move on and give someone else your love and support, someone who will welcome them more.
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