deathangel Posted December 2, 2005 Posted December 2, 2005 Hey Girls, Here is the situation. I have liked this one girl for a long time, however she was into someone else just after the summer. They had nothing in common and it didnt work out after just 4 weeks. Since then we have really been seeing a lot of eachother, going for dinner, going for drinks, movies etc. Only thing is I never really knew if I had a chance or not so just last night i sent her a text telling her that I liked her more than just a friend and also told her that she didn't have to say or do anything, i felt that I just needed to tell you. Since last night, I haven't yet got a reply (expected really), but is this a good sign? Have been friends with her for ages and I won't make it awkward in any way if she says no, do I tell her this as well or just continue acting the way I always do, being myself? Thanks Girls, love u all x
katiebour Posted December 2, 2005 Posted December 2, 2005 Heya deathangel, In college I went on a date with a guy who had been my good friend for about 3 years. After that date, I realized I wasn't romantically interested in him, and it was soo hard for me to tell him. He called me, asking to go out again, play tennis, etc, and I continued to give vague replies out of embarrassment time and time again for about a week until I finally blurted out that I didn't want to go out again. I felt really bad and I realized that he was hurt, but I didn't want to pretend and stretch things out. You probably realize that not getting a reply is not a good sign. In my own experience, whenever I have been interested in a guy, I have followed up on every overture he has made, making sure he knows that his interest is mutual. With my friend, things were weird for about 6 months until we were both seeing other people and could put the almost romance behind us. I would say, wait for her to contact you. Don't bombard her with emails or calls- if she likes you she will make the next move. And if you don't hear from her, then I'd assume that she is not romantically interested in you. If/when she does contact you, act the same as you always do- in uncomfortable situations the old adage often works: "least said soonest mended." That's my two cents, anyway. Good luck!
Author deathangel Posted December 3, 2005 Author Posted December 3, 2005 Its been two days now and I don't think she is going to reply to that text message. To be fair, I'm starting to regret not telling her when we on the manchester wheel (similar to the London eye). She was cuddling up with me then and I knew I should have said something but was a bit reluctant to as it would be a very awkward place to be should she have said no then. Anyway, can't change the past, but was thinking ofcalling her on wednesday and take her somewhere chilled (not to show im making a big effort ) i.e. for coffee or something. She may bring up the subject then I could at least see what she has to say. I'll just be completely chilled and normal around her. Is this a good idea?
katiebour Posted December 5, 2005 Posted December 5, 2005 Hi Death, Again, I think that her not responding is not a good sign. My advice for you at this point is to give her space. At the most I would send her a message telling her that you care about her as a friend and didn't mean to make her uncomfortable, and that she can talk to you if/when she wants to. Then leave it at that and let her respond. What she needs now is less pressure- not more. Don't force yourself on her, thinking that if you talk about it it'll make it all better. Trying to be friends with someone who likes you is awkward. If she doesn't like you (and she's not acting like she does) then she's probably feeling guilty for encouraging you. She needs space, and to know that you understand if she's not into you. Give her room- give her time. She'll talk to you when she's ready. Good luck.
JoL Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 Well Deathangel...i would say to you as a female, if i didnt respond to a message of this variety is probably 99% due to the fact that i dont want to hurt my friend, because i dont feel the same way. If i did feel the same way, i would have picked up the phone and called him straight away to confess my feelings too.... Im sorry if my opinion seems harsh, but i dont think this girl is going to tell you what you want to hear
Skeered Posted December 6, 2005 Posted December 6, 2005 Sorry not to confuse things but maybe she didn't get the message? Just a thought... But if she did receive it then I would say she is not wanting to hurt your feelings and she might be a bit on edge as to what to say. I would suggest call her in the next couple days and as you said if she brings it up talk about it...but let her know that regardless you still want to be friends. I have been the one that let known my feelings to someone once and he didn't feel the same (at the time) but to this day we are still great friends and I wouldn't change a thing.
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