darhma Posted December 1, 2005 Posted December 1, 2005 I have never had a problem meeting datable men in my life. I have been one of those serial monogamist (4 serious long term relationships in my life) and never had a problem finding my next relationship. However, I have had a heck of time getting that zing with someone this time and when it has been there they usually bolt before it amounts to anything. At first I thought it was the fact that I was healing over an ugly breakup. So for the first time in my life I went on dating sabatical for about year. Started dating about a couple months ago...going out, on-line, having friends fix me up etc. It really is a pathetic lot. The one guy I did get the zing with bolted before it started. The men who have never been married in this age group have no clue to real intimacy and the ones that have been married are a mess. Is it possible to find a normal relationship...with the killer chemistry and nervous phone calls...and to trully love like you did when you were younger? This is not just my problem I know several beautiful smart put together women who are having the same problem. Is there anyone out there who has found that dizzy kind of love again at this age?
Neptune Posted December 1, 2005 Posted December 1, 2005 ....but love does happen. However, it is no different than when younger.....just more difficult. Don`t go shopping for a guy like you would at 21. The field is narrowed. I have seen some over 40 go 5 or 6 maybe more years before they really made the right connection. Blunt for a moment. Look in the mirror. If you are sure you look as good as you did at 21 then expect the same attention from men you got at 21. But, if not, then realize it does make a difference.
Author darhma Posted December 1, 2005 Author Posted December 1, 2005 I am blessed with very good genes...but I am not 21 anymore...fair enough. I guess patience is key...something I do not have much of. Thank you Neptune for putting things in perspective. I guess I just need to pray and just keep doing what I have been doing...just enjoy my life without having a significant other. I just get so lonely sometimes. I have spent my life loving something and it just seems so hopeless to find that zing anymore.
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