songbird9982 Posted November 29, 2005 Posted November 29, 2005 ok.. i met this guy this february at a local bar. when i saw him i wasn't really interested, i don't know why, but i didn't really find him attractive (that should have been my first clue to what was to come, but anyway) but, i'd had a few drinks, and wanted to have a good time, so when he asked me to dance i did. so i end up going home with him, which is something i would usually never do, but my friend i was with knew him and said he was cool, and the drinks didn't hurt. we end up sleeping together, which was my second mistake, not because the sex was bad, it was actually the best sex i've ever had. B/c of this we ended up spending every day and night of the next two weeks together. No one had ever been able to please me in bed the way he did, it was great. And he seemed to think so too. He even said he was falling in love, and i told him he was crazy that we'd only known each other for a couple of weeks. and though i wasn't in love with him i was falling. BUT as all good things must come to an end, he ended up leaving me for a girl he had been talking to before me. he said that he really liked me, but he liked her in a different way and since he'd already asked her out before, he couldn't let her down.(good one, huh?) So, to make a long story shorter(hehe) i ended up getting pregnant, the girl found out and broke up with him (keep in mind he'd been coming to see me the whole time) Then he tells me he wants to be with me and move in and do what's right for the baby. But, he never did, and though we saw each other on and off, we never really got together. we tried to be together, but we always seem to end up fighting. the sexual chemistry is awesome, but other than that, we just couldn't get along. what i dont understand is the fact that though we don't seem to get along and we're total opposites, he always calls me and says he wants to be with me and wants to help me raise our daughter. like the other day he said maybe we should get married. but then he'll tell me that he cares about me and worries about me, but he just doesn't feel "that" way about me. i don't understand why he keeps giving me mixed signals. then he tells me about this girl who he was madly in love with who broke his heart, and he can't live without her. it's like he's trying to hurt me. why could he love her but not me, i was so good to him! maybe i was too good. Was I too available, did I make it too easy for him, and if so, how do i make myself seem harder to get, and how can i make myself more appealing to him. why does he call every day and say we should get married, but then say we can't be together. also, why is it so easy for him to fall for these other women, but not me???!!!! I appreciate your advice, sorry this was so long!!
Outcast Posted November 29, 2005 Posted November 29, 2005 He sounds pretty messed up. I wouldn't marry him unless he agreed to go to couples counselling first. It's too bad you're in this predicament. Don't make it worse by marrying him.
Author songbird9982 Posted November 29, 2005 Author Posted November 29, 2005 thanks. he does have problems, especially with women. his mom left him when he was three, but that's still no excuse. it's like i know i shouldn't be with him, but i can't stop thinking about him. i know it's bad, but i think i'm mostly scared i won't be able to find another man to please me and excite me the way he does. but in the end, i believe he'll always hurt me and make me miserable. are there any guys in their twenties who don't want to play games and who actually want a commited relationship, but most of all who aren't scared of a good woman?
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