AltplanB Posted November 28, 2005 Posted November 28, 2005 My gf broke up with me and our discussions below will illustrate why and whats been going on. I would like to hear peoples opinions and strategies. Thank you! Her message: I'm not "with someone else", just dating. I'm not cold hearted- you'll see some day. Anyways, that is the last I'll say about anything pertaining to us. best intentions- that is all. I'm glad you had fun on your hiking trip. i think that pic must have been from it. Talk to you soon. Mine: (was just about whats goin on, nothing about us.) Hers: (responds to whats goin on in my life) Mine: A lot of the things you said in the blog made a lot of sense and i went through those reasons as well. Im sorry that your holidays aren't gonna go the way you want because of your dad. If it makes you feel better, i got you a christmas present. I dunno where to send it though, your place or down south. Also, i think things are gonna get a lot better for me, but i know it will take time. I had this girl work me through the entire thing. She put a lot of it in perspective and made me feel better. She also told me that i shouldn't of made my home in your life. I shoulda found my own **** that made me excited. Saying that, im gonna give crew another shot. By next semester, i should be a lot better. After you, i dont want any women in my life clouding those dreams. Gonna do stuff for myself. Hers: please return it. i don't want anything- it will just make me feel like ****. In no part of my own did I cloud your dreams, you are in charge of yourself and I only pushed you to do more. I thought you couldn't do crew b/c of your back? that would probably be a pretty stupid decision, can't really mess with your anatomy. Yes, you shouldn't have made me your home. You shouldn't make anyone or any one thing your home- crew for instance, b/c if your body goes to ****- so does the one thing that matters in your life. you can still have "women in you life", but just balance it out. it is pretty easy. you can still get the affection/love from other humans & the love from your own personal interests- you can have it all, and I sure you will have it all. Despite my worries of your back- I'm glad you have decided that you miss crew- it was one of your passions and it definately puts a smile on myface knowing your going to be doing something you love again. Mine: I thought a lot about what you said yesterday and what your telling me now. What i meant about my dreams was that i was comfortable with you, and that i didn't care about my lack of focus. Without you though, i made the realization that i needed to do stuff for myself and i should of had you as part of my life, not the pointof it. I'm sorry that things didn't work out and that your so definate on things. I came to the realization that i envy you. I want to be excited about things and i want to have things that make me happy. I want to get up at 6 in the morning and i want to get **** done, but i am a depressed person. Ive always been mildly depressed and eventually it wore you down. Im sorry. I asked my parents and they agreed that i can go on anti depressants. I want to be a the person you are, if only just to improve myself for myself. I am gonna retry crew and if it doesn't work, im gonna focus on my job on the sail boat and on a job at school. I'm also gonna get more into school. All the things that you told me that you looked for in a person are things that i consider to be goals for myself. I want to be that person and i want you to give me the time and patience to try. Im not asking for anything, just that you watch me change to be that person. Hers: I don't really know what to say. I'm not sure if we should be talking. I don't think it is helping you, in the end. I don't see us getting back together. Again, I'm at a loss for words. so.... hmmm.... I'll talk ot you soon. Sorry so short. I'm just pretty speechless. --- Her reasons for breaking it off with me is because she was unattracted to the fact that i have no aspirations and dreams and that i kinda see the negative side of things. Other than that we had no problems and got along great. I was always really happy around her but she knew i was like this when i wasn't around her. These messages illustrate me wanting to change and her not giving me the chance. Thoughts?
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