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Intentions Clarified


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Posted

I didn't see this coming at all.

 

But first, a bit of background.

 

I have a small number of FWB companions that I hang with on occasion. Earlier this week I was trying to set up an evening with one of them, which proved somewhat difficult because she's a busy woman.

 

Here's a portion of an email I got yesterday from her:

 

--------------------------

 

It was about MONEY!! It was all about MONEY!! I'
m
not in love with you, I never was. I like your sexual talents and your sense of humour, but I really like your money!

 

I don't WANT to listen to your issues. I'
m
not interested in meeting your family. I don't want to spend holidays with you. I don't want to go away for a weekend, or spend time with you other than sexually. Yes, you're rich and fun and you make me laugh, but I have enough friends that I don't really care whether you're in my life or not.

 

Stop being
so
pissy. Lose the attitude and then we'll talk.

 

Got it?

 

--------------------------

 

I guess I made the mistake of telling her that I was developing stronger feelings for her than I originally intended.

 

Moral of the story: Keep your feelings to yourself.

 

I already knew that, but for some reason I guess I forgot. Slow learner, I suppose.

Posted

Lose the feelings, but not the erection.

 

Nice.

 

Some female friends wish for the exact opposite.

Posted

She's a gold digger... look out. I hope you haven't invested too many feelings in that one as she sounds like a real piece of work. If I were you I'd just let that one go. She sounds like major bad news. FWB or not.

Posted

Are you spending money on this chick?

  • Author
Posted
Are you spending money on this chick?

Nothing extravagant; just the occasional dinner out, and helped her buy some paint for her house but that's been about it.

If I were you I'd just let that one go.
Already done. It was just a surprise, that's all. Should have known better, I suppose.
Posted

Bloody hell, slubber - that's not a pleasant surprise to find in your inbox :( Did she give any indication as to what prompted her to write such a thing?

Posted

that is awful. How heartless! What all did you tell her? I would think a grown woman would be a little more tactful? Is she a grown woman? D you stalk her or something? Wow that was such a rude email! I am sorry.

Posted

Moral of the story: Keep your feelings to yourself.

 

I already knew that, but for some reason I guess I forgot. Slow learner, I suppose.

 

no, moral of the story should be keep your feelings for your friends. This woman obviously did not match the "F" from FWB only the B.

 

that was one of the nastiest emails I have ever come across, would make me sick to think I even bothered having dinner with someone who would put something like that in writing... and then still expects to see/hear from you!

 

no amount of good sex would make it worth getting a comment like that from someone... and I still don't get it, the fact that you have money ( which is all she is interested in) makes you better sexually (the only time she wants to spend with you) WTF?

 

good riddance I say, better now than before developing any other feelings for her!

Posted

The email is very blunt but she's being honest. Would you have bothered to spend time with her if you didn't consider her a f*** buddy, and you knew there was no chance of getting some action with her? Seems to me like you were both getting all that you wanted, but you developed feelings for her.

 

I don't understand where this FWB thing has come from. If you just want a root, just go to a nightclub and meet someone, then you never have to see them again. FWB just seems to me something that is bound to create a mess.

Posted

Can't remember who but a female LSer posted the same sort of complaint last night. So you two should get together and introduce your FWBs who only want the 'B' parts!

  • Author
Posted

Well, it's all done now, I don't ever expect to see her again, nor will I contact her. Even hardass guys like yours truly occasionally develop feelings for people, especially ones that share the bed.

 

Lesson learned.

Posted
Even hardass guys like yours truly occasionally develop feelings for people, especially ones that share the bed.

 

Are you really a hardass guy? I don't get that from your posts.

Posted

I agree, you feel crusty on the outside but you still have a soft spot within. Maybe you're ready for a real relationship?

  • Author
Posted
I agree, you feel crusty on the outside but you still have a soft spot within.

*pokes belly* You're right! I do have a soft spot! It's just above my bellybutton!

Maybe you're ready for a real relationship?

Alas, been there, done that, left broken-hearted. Twice. Maybe someday I'll be "ready" (whatever that entails) but not soon.

Posted

 

It was about MONEY!! It was all about MONEY!! I'
m
not in love with you, I never was. I like your sexual talents and your sense of humour, but I really like your money!

 

I don't WANT to listen to your issues. I'
m
not interested in meeting your family. I don't want to spend holidays with you. I don't want to go away for a weekend, or spend time with you other than sexually. Yes, you're rich and fun and you make me laugh, but I have enough friends that I don't really care whether you're in my life or not.

 

Stop being
so
pissy. Lose the attitude and then we'll talk.

 

Got it?

 

--------------------------

 

It's amazing what spills out when you're pissed about something....the truth.

 

I'm sorry you had to hear it that way.

Posted

Wow. I would have to say that was one pretty nasty email.

 

The good news is - you know where you stand and have moved forward.

 

You help people on LS - you can't be all bad! :)

 

Keep your chin up!

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