jacked17 Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 Has anyone here ever sought professional help to try to get over someone and cope with a break up. I was dating a girl for two and half year. She's my first true love and I love her with all of my heart. We broke up in July and took some time off to hang out with friends and reevaluate. She moved on and I always thought we'd end up together. I tried getting back together with her and she told me for 2 months how much she loved me and promised me we'd get back together. She called me her soul mate and said we'd always be together. Then one day she woke up and told me she didn't love me and she really liked someone else and she'd moved on. My world is crushed. It's starting to affect my work and my health. My friends are worried about me because it's all I can talk or think about. I cry about it all the time and I can't stop contacting her. I try to contact her every day and it's gotten to the point where I've pushed her to hate me but it's like I'm addicted. I really think I need professional help. Has anyone ever gone that route and did it help?
solsta Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 I am seeing someone right now and let me tell you, it's the best thing ever. To realize that you are not insane and that your feelings are normal. I too just about lost my job and everything around me because of the person I was with. It's just not worth it. Life is too short, don't feel that you need to do this alone!
Jellostick Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 If you feel you need professional help then seek professional help. I went and continue to go and it works for me but it might not work for you but if you believe in yourself and who you're talking to, it will work. But no offense but this post is just like your other posts. I hate to break it to you but she's not the love of your life and she's not your soulmate. Two people agree on that and obviously she doesn't think you're either so perhaps you need to move on. Is she really worth hurting yourself? Is being unhealthy worth it? Is losing your job worth it? I think you can safely answer "no" to those questions because no boyfriend or girlfriend is worth that. My son passed away almost 4 years ago and he was worth it 'cause he was one of a kind, I'll get another girlfriend. Hurting yourself over someone who dumped you is pointless. I mentioned to you before and other have mentioned to you that you need to worry about yourself. Get it out of your head that this person is meant to be in your life because if she was meant to be then she would be in it but she's not so get over it. Someone mentioned how you should grow a backbone and it's true because you seem weak. You're 23 years old and there are so many people in your shows, you think you'll be alone forever? You think that this is the only girl you're meant to be w/? I know two people who who have had one significant other in their life and married them and that's rare and if it happens then great but frankly, go out and enjoy life 'cause life is too short for you to be worried about some chick that doesn't give to craps about you. The best thing you can do for yourself is to prove how strong you can be and your'e not showing it at all. The person most important in this situation is you and no one else so go and seek help and don't do it for her or for anyone else but yourself 'cause that's the only person that matters. If you don't seek help then face the fact that it's over and she's not worth it and move on. She's not worth your energy or anything else you're giving up. Move on. Cheers.
slubberdegullion Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 Thank goodness you found out about her erratic behaviour before you did anything further, like living together or getting married. I mean, if she's that fickle, why would you want anything more to do with her? Although I didn't seek out professional help regarding a break-up, I've sought it for other reasons. So go seek some counselling. And find a good counsellor, because just like doctors and mechanics and ministers, some are good, some are ok, and some are terrible. Some workplaces have an Employee Assistance Program which will point you in the right direction. If you don't have that, then go to your doctor and ask for a recommendation. And STOP CONTACTING HER. It's doing you absolutley no good whatsoever.
ReluctantRomeo Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 I really think I need professional help. Has anyone ever gone that route and did it help? Yes. Following the break with Juliet. And it helped enormously - not least in clarifying how and why I missed the red flags. Having said that, it has only been 3-4 months. Still feeling bad is pretty normal, provided there are days when you feel better now.
Author jacked17 Posted November 23, 2005 Author Posted November 23, 2005 Yeah I know getting over her would help. I'm well aware of that. I'm just having a lot of guilt issues and I just feel like us breaking up was all my fault because of the way I treated her when I was together. Yeah I know it's too late to do anything about it now and I should've realized while I was being a jerk but I didn't. My behavior sucked and yeah I know everything is a learning experience but it just really sucks to learn it with someone u truly care about. Yeah I know she's the worst and she treated me terrible and I should just move on but it's incredibly difficult when she's already dating someone and never even grieved over me. I just hate the way I feel every single day. Yeah I'm 23 but I just don't want to go through life thinking she's the one who got away.
Recommended Posts