leeroy1985 Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 Someone help me! On Monday night me and my girlfriend had an argument because she was supposed to be spending the night with me but the she said she had 'forgot' that she was doing something with her friend! I got pissed off and drove off in a huff. Later that night she asked to talk to me so we talked but then something happened that i never knew i could do...... I went crazy, i was like a totally different person, i was shouting and driving fast and really being nasty... i dont know where it came from but i finished with her and now i feel the worst ive ever felt in my life and the worst thing is she doesnt want to get back with me and im devastated Im 20 and shes 18 and weve been together for nearly a year and its been the best year in my 20 years alive and i dont want it to end but how do i show her how much she means to me? I know its not a lost cause because shes been crying and stuff and we met up last night and had a talk. Shes close to my sister and shed told her that she wanted to get back with me but i have to change. She told me last night that she loved me but she doesnt want to be with someone that is like her dad and that i have to prove to her that i can change but how can i do it if im not with her? She wants me to phone her tonight when i finish work but i dont know what to say ill just start crying and tell her i love her but that just makes me look weak and pathetic. She told me i have to fight to get her back because saying im sorry and i love her isnt enough, which is understandable, but knowing that i may never be with her again kills me and i cant think straight. Im meeting up with her on Thursday and she wants to see something that proves im going to change and that i really do want to be with her. This is really hard for me because im not used to feeling like this but shes had boyfriends before so shes probably just using past experience but i have no past experience and i feel useless, i couldnt sleep last night and i cant work properly because shes on my mind constantly! So what im really asking is what can i do to get her back? How can i show her that im going to change by Thursday? Im prepared to do anything to get her back but form what ive explained above do you think it will work if we do get back together? Im all confused now and i feel awful, i deserve it but surely if i make it better and prove i can change it doesnt make me a bad person! I need to win her friends back too because they probably hate me (if shes told them) PLEASE HELP ME!!! Im a little love sick puppy and i need help Thanks in advance people!
Forever Searching Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 This is a tough situation and I'm sorry to hear you are in it. I was in a similar situation this week as well. I was the one that messed up. The good news is she wants to talk to you and it seems like she wants to work things out. What I suggest is when you do talk to her just try to be as calm as you can. Don't cry and get emotional. It sounds like she is looking for a man that she can depend on and feel emotionally secure and safe with. That is how you need to be. Just calmly explain to her that you are very sorry you blew up at her over something so stupid and just explain why it made you so mad. Why did it make you so mad that she forgot she had made plans? It sounds like maybe you are depending too much on her. You also have to be happy with yourself and your life. Maybe try spending a little more time apart. Go out and do things with your friends and don't worry so much about what she is doing. I gurantee if you distance yourself a little she will notice and will start kissing butt!!!!
Author leeroy1985 Posted November 23, 2005 Author Posted November 23, 2005 Why did it make you so mad that she forgot she had made plans? Because last week we had something arranged and she forgot and arranged something with her friend. I told her that we had something arranged and she just said sorry and went out with her friend instead of sticking by what she should be doing (going out with me) But when she arranges something with her friend and forgets and arranges something with me, her friend reminds her and she changes to going out with her friend as she originally planned instead of going out with me like she would of done if it was the other way around. I think thats readable. Anyway today i phoned her and we talked (still no closed to getting back with her) and she told me she was going out with a friend and she wants me to phone her tonight when she gets home. Should I?
Forever Searching Posted November 24, 2005 Posted November 24, 2005 ok, now things make more sense. I think you had a right to be angry with her even though you shouldn't have gotten so mad to act the way you did but I understand, I do it too. Unless it's too late and you already have DO NOT CALL HER she is playing games with you becaue you are letting her. In my opinion I would start blowing her off and pulling yourself away from the relationship to make her feel insecure. If she feels that she is loosing you she may come around. Do not let her walk all over you like she is. She should be just as considerate with you as she is her friends. Sounds like she is trying to ease out of the realtionship and the only way I think you can save it is to ease back as well and let her come to you. Good luck keep us updated!!!
Author leeroy1985 Posted November 24, 2005 Author Posted November 24, 2005 Thanks for the advice! Well yeh it is too late... i called her last night. I can see where your coming from with your NC thingy but i really upset her and i think i scared her with my shouting, i mean im 6'5" and shes only 5'3" so you can imagine how intimidated she felt and i hate that i made her feel that way because i love her and i feel so guilty. I hate to admit it but i think im in the wrong (God i cant believe im admitting that!) Yeh she shouldnt of done what she did but ill counter that once it happens again when i have her back. Thanks again for the advice man!
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