Katch22 Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 Please answer this honestly just had a reasonable question for all of the o/w out there about their married mans profession???? How many of us are involved with a A) Police Officer B) Fire Fighter C) Realtor D)Other... please let us know what other stands for!!! Just a crazy idea to see if the CAKEEATERS also have more then that in common ????? It's been awhile since I've been on here and I'm sure you all can figure out why!!! Cause the mm was really good at his Bullsh*t and got me to come back and I'm still in LIMBO! But like I said to my best friend that no one can tell me until I want to see it myself!!! So I hope you all understand!! Love Ya all Katch22;)
whichwayisup Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 Just a crazy idea to see if the CAKEEATERS also have more then that in common ????? I don't think a cakeeater's profession has anything to do with it. Ego is ego. Just passing through and giving my 2 cents...
TUDOR Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 I think a poll of what the OW do for a profession might produce more results because cakeeaters prey on opportunity and I think the OW's profession and frame of mind is what presents the opportunity. Kind of like a lion singling out the weak prey instead of going after the more healthy prey. But I am curious to see what your poll produces.
whichwayisup Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 I agree with you TUDOR, more about the frame of mind of OW, rather than the profession.
erika2610 Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 D) Other - He works for some kinda place that builds like Airplane parts and things of that nature. And he was at the time a part time cook. And I was a waitress..
goingforgold Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 d) other - A Dentist. Not really fully involved yet, but getting there.
d'Arthez Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 There may be a connection between profession and cake-eating. How many hippies would serve in the police force? How many vegans will be working in a butchery? How many cash minded professionals will be volunteering all of their time to save some sort of exotic animal? Rates of cheating, differ between the professions. And the "reasons" why cheating is being done, and why people think they can get away with it, will also differ. Being in a position of authority is probably indeed a risk. The same with doctors, who have sex with some of their patients. It happens, and as far as I know seldomly leads to a suit. A bit off-topic now: If a policeman rapes a woman, the chances of him being convicted may be smaller than when a gardener rapes a woman. We can well imagine the reasons for that. I would not be surprised if there exists a profession-bias in this too. With fire-fighters and policemen less likely to be given sentences as long as the average non-fire-fighter or policeman, or even university teachers with their pupils well above the age of parental consent. Do a lot of states not have a clause that policemen who are convicted for abusing their authority, get thrice as long sentences, because of that? As for the professions of the OW, I think that is less relevant than MM's profession. It is more about the "state of mind" of OW, and you can feel seriously down or abandoned no matter what profession you are in. I think risk factors may include: (recent) abondonments, (slight) depressions, perhaps even being fired from the job (downsizing, anyone). Not to say, that all OW suffer from every ailment in the book. Far from it.
goingforgold Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 Has anyone here read "Women who stay with Men Who Stray" I think the author is Debbie Then. Quite an interesting read and from surveys done it said men that were earning over $75.000 p.a were most likely to cheat and from the survey done 90% cheated.
Author Katch22 Posted November 23, 2005 Author Posted November 23, 2005 I wasn't asking for an exact science of what profession are most likely to cheat I was just curious to find out what they all did and if there were some similarities!!!! It was just something that makes me go HUM??? And as far as the womens profession I would have to agree that it's doesn't really make a difference someone said earlier that it was the mm that prey on us. Because we are showing some kind of weakness, and I don't think thats correct 100% either. I was not a weak person actually I was quite the opposite from that I think that is what started the first actraction was that i was very strong minded and very independent. When we meet I was going through a divorce that I wanted and he happened to be someone that I could call and vent my frustrations out with. It slowly progressed from there and it was nice to have that excitement back in my life. When my phone would ring I would smile unlike when my soon to be exh would call it would just aggreavate me... Well, anyway my mm is a A)Police Officer and I never in a million years would've pictured my involved with a cop let alone being an OW!
scarletletter Posted November 23, 2005 Posted November 23, 2005 mine is a quality manager for a manufacturing company...
lilmoma1973 Posted November 24, 2005 Posted November 24, 2005 I think a poll of what the OW do for a profession might produce more results because cakeeaters prey on opportunity and I think the OW's profession and frame of mind is what presents the opportunity. Kind of like a lion singling out the weak prey instead of going after the more healthy prey. But I am curious to see what your poll produces. I too agree with Tudor and WWIU there probably are the same as was said all cake eaters but do different professions just and don't care who they hurt as long as they getting what they want!!!!
RecordProducer Posted November 24, 2005 Posted November 24, 2005 I think a poll of what the OW do for a profession might produce more results because cakeeaters prey on opportunity and I think the OW's profession and frame of mind is what presents the opportunity. Kind of like a lion singling out the weak prey instead of going after the more healthy prey. But I am curious to see what your poll produces.Tudor, you're becoming a professional shrink! I love your observation!
crazy_grl Posted November 24, 2005 Posted November 24, 2005 someone said earlier that it was the mm that prey on us. Because we are showing some kind of weakness, and I don't think thats correct 100% either. I was not a weak person actually I was quite the opposite from that I think that is what started the first actraction was that i was very strong minded and very independent. When we meet I was going through a divorce that I wanted and he happened to be someone that I could call and vent my frustrations out with. It slowly progressed from there and it was nice to have that excitement back in my life. When my phone would ring I would smile unlike when my soon to be exh would call it would just aggreavate me... It would seem to me that your explaination of your situation supports what Tudor and D'Arthez were saying about MM preying on a woman's weakness / frame of mind. If you were going through a divorce and needed someone who you could talk to and who could make you smile, wouldn't that be a weakened frame of mind the MM could take advantage of?
kkat Posted November 24, 2005 Posted November 24, 2005 I'll give my stats/vote/opinions. My MM/ex-MM is an entrepreunuer, and owner of a v upscale restaurant which he also manages. He's a cucko more than a cakeman - he doesn't want to have it all really as much as he is scared to make any changes in his life - and I mean ANY changes. So he stays in a maintenable marriage and protects his assets and his status quo, while he pursue any type of relationship with me he can have. He's in love with me, wants me in his life in any way he can have me, wants to do things for me all the time, etc. Just is too scared and pathetically weak to leave his wife and family (of course the first time he left them and he and lived together for 3 years. But ultimately, he ran out of money and guilt overtook him as his wife daily treatened to kill herself and he went back home....) In my mind, I was not the OW in that relationship with him years ago. He and lived together, publicly and openly, for 3 years, with his children visiting and lawyers working on the divorce. When that little old divorce didn't actually happen, (Thank the lord in hindsight!) I left him and ultimately we ended our relationship and disconnected for 7 years. Upon reconnecting, I absolutely became, without realizing what hit me, the OW, and have been -- off and on - for 2.5 years. Here, it's absolutely as D'A and other posters imply - it's about me - what was going on with me that allowed me to get involved. I was lonely yet afraid of initimacy/comittment, a bit depressed over losing my business and my identity that came along with it - and along came mr. perfect right now... I think I was the sole target for him because he had always been in love with me; but even so, I was an easy target. There are a number of women I know involved with successful married men in the city - the relationships are all very similar - the women are divorced with children or even never married (like me) career women who have given up on concept of having children (I haven't given up on that!) and find that in many ways, the MM is the ideal mate for them a great deal of the time. Now I have a great guy, who really loves me, like crazy, in love with me, and shows it to me day in and day out who is burning his candle at both ends to keep his wife out of town and manage time with me. This is a guy who goes to the store every day to buy things for me, brings me articles to help my business, takes me to my favoriate restaurants, goes to buy me lipstick as little surprises and brings me cake. Everyday he tries to do a simple little thing to express his love for me. But, he's so unhappy it's just sad, and every day I get stronger and stronger and realize I'd like to be with this man, really be with him, but that this is not looking likely, and I would ALSO like to be with someone else - someone I haven't found yet - but someone else a little simpler and more free! It's a crazy relationship and unhealthy. Stay away. So rarely does it deliver peace and fulfillment to anyone. I took an Ambien before I wrote this and too sleepy. Sorry! Namaste.
newbby Posted November 24, 2005 Posted November 24, 2005 hey kkat, i agree with you. i met my xmm during a very low time. he definetly did not have a good job. perhaps the type of job makes a difference to the type of a. xmm definetly was looking for an ego boost. i think baldness, overweight, impotence, low paying job had knocked his self esteem. i dont think he was a typical cakeman.
Rodeogirl Posted November 28, 2005 Posted November 28, 2005 mine is a program director and radio jock in my area.
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