NoFaith05 Posted November 18, 2005 Posted November 18, 2005 My ex GF was crazy about me (or so I thought). She told me I was her soulmate, the love of her life, and the man of her dreams. Then she walked out on me quite suddenly. She gave me all of these BS reasons as to why she wanted to break up, and at the time I believed her. I began my recovery process, and respected her wishes. But just recently I found out the truth (I explained it all in another thread). She left me for another guy, and she lied to me about it. Now I am going through a serious relapse, and feel just as bad as I did 3 months ago. She has hurt me more by not being honest with me. I told her this. I broke NC because I was really pissed off, and wanted some answers. She of course won't give them to me, and she keeps defending herself with bogus reasons. I suppose she is just trying to make herself feel better- because she knows that I discovered the truth behind her lies. I got angry (a very natural response) and now she is trying to turn this around on me, and make me feel like an irrational jerk. I won't stand for it. I have done nothing wrong, and I was a solid gold BF. My friends told her that she owes me an apology, but she refuses to give me one. She truly believes that she has done nothing wrong. So my question is, am I right to want an apology? I have endured a great amount of suffering because of this girl. I know that I probably won't get one because she has been acting like a real b*tch lately (and she used to be so sweet and sincere- maybe it was just an act?) I also know that most people will respond with a "get over her and move on" statement. But you have to realize that when someone you were close to does you wrong, it's very unsettling.
TUDOR Posted November 18, 2005 Posted November 18, 2005 An apology doesn't undue what has been done and doubtful it will make you feel any better about the situation. Like you said we would say, move on and put this behind you.
jomaxfury Posted November 18, 2005 Posted November 18, 2005 Do you deserve an apology? Yes, you do!!! Should you expect an apology? No you shouldn't!!! You ex sound so similar to the ex, in my situation. One thing I notice about people that lie is that they are shameless and cowards... they hide their shame and produce a cowardly act of putting the blame on you. Which is the easiest thing to do..Don't let a person like this get to you...I know its hard, but hang in there.
Art_Critic Posted November 18, 2005 Posted November 18, 2005 If she gave you an apology you would relapse and try to get her back.. I smell this in your words.. She hurt you.. You need to acknowledge it and try and move on.. You said she gave you the normal BS reasons for the breakup..Any rerason will do if you are breaking up with someone.. She at least did breakup with you when she found out her heart belonged to another.. consider yourself lucky.. You might have married her..
Author NoFaith05 Posted November 18, 2005 Author Posted November 18, 2005 "You ex sound so similar to the ex, in my situation. One thing I notice about people that lie is that they are shameless and cowards... they hide their shame and produce a cowardly act of putting the blame on you. Which is the easiest thing to do..Don't let a person like this get to you...I know its hard, but hang in there." I couldn't agree more JoMaxFury. I know that I won't get an apology, but I just wanted to feel somewhat validated for being angry. She's the one who hurt me, and she has no right to make me feel guilty because I got angry about it.
jomaxfury Posted November 19, 2005 Posted November 19, 2005 NoFaith05, She said the same nice things to me about me being her soulmate and stuff...In fact I am at three months also, just like you, but I went strict NC since the first minute of the break up. I don't know but after three months you start realizing what kind people the ex's were. In my mind I have called her every bad word ever created, in languages that I don't even speak or recognize...I think is part of the healing process man, it's normal. Let her go do your own thing. Like Art_Critc says, "consider yourself lucky", I know I do. You know what you need to do, follow strict NC. It will help you.It's definitely helping me!
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