Genod422 Posted November 17, 2005 Posted November 17, 2005 I have a post that I would welcome anyone to read entitled "She literally went insane" but i decided to start this one as well to expand on thoughts. For my background read the aforementioned post...I'm crushed, going on two weeks since I was dumped by my love, my gf of a year and a half and so on. Here it is: I am still in sooo much pain, anger, jealousy and so on but I feel no matter how bad it is it will get better. I care for her too much and love her still and I shouldn't for how she ended it and risked it all on going to parties and perhaps finding someone better. Now it seems one of her guy friends has gone in for the kill and is being sweet and such and I feel she is falling for him I consider her the rebound. No matter how much she has changed and is a partier and is just a different person, she likes this guy for the level she's at right now. He is a smoker, drinker, kind of ugly, and not her type but it doesn't matter to me. I feel it can't last, she's from NJ he's from Cali, he is leaving the school in about 7 months to do Co-Op, and so on. I feel NC is my friend although it is hard and I have come to accept that if it is meant to be it will be and she will know when she misses me. Right now she doesn't love me and doesn't want to be with me. I have no hope and whatever I do have I have to eventually ignore it but here it is as well: She is studying to be a doctor and is a freshman in college. Now I saw her schedule for next term and it is insane. Living the party life a lot and becoming a doctor do not go hand in hand, Im sorry, and she'll foul up. Once this guy also doesn live up to his expectations she will have it could not work out. Anyways I know she isn't coming back soon. I feel she may one day for the fact that she needs to party and be alone and get hurt by others and get into other relationships, etc. but for now she is doing that stuff and loving it and it will take a while for her to get to the point she was at when she met me and decided I was the best (Alone, tired of being ignored, tired of being let down by bfs, somewhat tired of partying, etc.) With the hope, I still must also feel its hopeless and I have to move on.
Author Genod422 Posted November 17, 2005 Author Posted November 17, 2005 Wow, I'm sorry, she is a sophomore in college. We were together all through her freshman year.
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