housebaby Posted November 15, 2005 Posted November 15, 2005 Hi all! It's been awhile since I've posted on LS. I have been single and dated a few people in the past 3 months. Nothing has really materialized. Not enough time - and not enough guys who understand my constraints. I have an 8 year old daughter, my own business and have very little time for men/dating. Well, last week I met this guy who has a 5 year old son. We really hit it off, he seems to be perfect for me. He understands parenthood (he has his son "Riley" for 4 days a week, the mother has him the other 3 days). He is very responsible, yet fun-loving. I felt very comfortable with him right away, like I could be myself - and he felt the same. He is very expressive, and makes me feel so beautiful and intelligent. We spent an entire day (his day off) together. He seems like everything I could ever want: Sexy, Confidant, Humorous, Hard working, caring, responsible, adventurous, open-minded, tender yet strong -- and he is into the kind of sports I enjoy (snowboarding, skateboarding, etc). He's only 1 year older than me (26)....and the best part is that he understands the constraints parenthood puts on a person/relationship. So, it seems to be all good --- now my question is: do you all think this could work? Would it be MORE or LESS complicated given that we BOTH are parents? Should we be cautious of telling our little ones? what if they don't get along (I don't see that happening-since my daughter is a girl, and is older than his son....and also: my daughter skateboards, so does his son. She is a really sporty kind of girl, not too prissy). Don't get me wrong - we just met, and we aren't trying to rush anything....we are still getting to know each other....but I am a worry-wart, and was hoping maybe someone on LS has been in this position! If anyone else tried to date with both people being parents....let me know your experiences! Thanks/
almostthere Posted November 15, 2005 Posted November 15, 2005 I am a 26 yo mom of 2. my son is a month shy of 8 and my daughter is 5. I have been divorced for 3 years. Just the differences between my last ex and my new bf say it to me....theres a huge difference. Single men without children dont seem to understand that we cannot be with them all the time. That sometimes our children wont quiet for the babysitter and we run late. And they dont understand that sometimes we dont have the energy because we were busy playing at the park with our kids. My new bf has 3 children. He cooks dinner for them every night and keeps them til 7:30pm and takes them home. I cannot and will not leave my children before I tuck them in to bed at night. Which put me at about 8:30 - 9:00pm before I can even think about rushing off to walk into a movie during the previews. Men with children seem to be more responsible, a bit more grown up, a little more sensitive to your needs. The guys I have dated without kids seemed to be frustrated at the fact that I have children after a few weeks. It sounds like you are very excited!! Good for you....I hope it all works out well.
alphamale Posted November 15, 2005 Posted November 15, 2005 I have an 8 year old daughter, my own business and have very little time for men/dating. If you have very little time for men/dating then why are you dating at all? Answer that for me and then i'll give you my opinions on the rest of your questions.
Author housebaby Posted November 15, 2005 Author Posted November 15, 2005 If you have very little time for men/dating then why are you dating at all? Answer that for me and then i'll give you my opinions on the rest of your questions. Well Alphamale......I do have a pulse! I'm not dead, and I am human....meaning? I have needs like anyone else. Sure, I may not have all the time or energy in the world to give to a relationship right now...but that doesn't mean that I don't want to try for something meaningful and something that can eventually lead to more when things settle down in my life. What I hope to find is someone who understands my position-isn't too selfish and is willing to take the time and patience to get to know me and spend time (when I have it). I hope that it may turn into something long-term .. but so far it's only been guys without children who grow tired of my "unavailability". So, I may not have all the time in the world, but I have maybe 2 days a month to spend with a guy or with my friends...it's a toss up.
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