chocolate_boy Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 Hi everyone, sorry just had to vent, just seen my ex for first time in about 4 weeks as she's at my neighbors house. I know I'm being unreasonable, but she is good friends with my neighbor, and they're off out for a big girly night out tonight (about 10 girls with them) and my ex is there, just left my house to go to the store and bumped into them going into my neighbors house, didn't talk to them apart from "hi" but hate knowing she's next door, can hear them laughing loud and banging around etc. Damn it's hard when something is shoved right under your nose. Also really sad that all I could say was "hi" to someone I shared all my dreams and life with only 2 months ago.. and I had to say it, or I really think she'd have just said nothing, dammit she's the one that dumped me, why am I getting the cold shoulder, b*tch should be apologising and being friendly if anything. I really hate this, feel like I've gone back a few stages again now.. was feeling great today too.
brittanyjean259 Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 im sorry you had to run in to your ex, thats a bummer...i know what that feels like and i know what it feels like to here stuff about them ARGHHHHHHH thats how you feel........ why did the two of you break up any ways:)?
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 12, 2005 Author Posted November 12, 2005 im sorry you had to run in to your ex, thats a bummer...i know what that feels like and i know what it feels like to here stuff about them ARGHHHHHHH thats how you feel........ why did the two of you break up any ways:)? We had an argument one weekend in september, first ever fall out we'd had, nothing major, I just cancelled a date to go out with my buddy (who I hadn't seen for a year) and we had a fall out, I apologised and we went on vacation together next day, she blanked me for the whole week ! Then apologised and said she wanted us to work things out and she loved me on our last day, I said ok, then she broke up with my via sms 2 days later! Reasons "im not in love with you anymore". Apparently she "severed all emotional ties" with me when I ditched her for my friend... After a year of being together that was pretty ****ty. Don't mind running into her, it's the fact that she is in the next room to me right now, hate her being in my neighbors house so much! Especially as I'm having a night in, so my lights are on on a sat night and she's off out partying, i feel like a loser now.
brittanyjean259 Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 if she is going to end it because you wanted to see a buddy that you havent seen in a year......yaks she must have been very " controling" just kidding... i nkow i always felt like that, if i new my ex was out having fun, makes me cringe my teeeeeeth well go out and do something and have fun, dont think about her...
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 12, 2005 Author Posted November 12, 2005 if she is going to end it because you wanted to see a buddy that you havent seen in a year......yaks she must have been very " controling" just kidding... i nkow i always felt like that, if i new my ex was out having fun, makes me cringe my teeeeeeth well go out and do something and have fun, dont think about her... Well she was very clingy when we were together, which is what made it even harder to stomach that she could just get up and leave so easily. From her point of view, I sacked her off to go out with my buddy, and she assumed I was going to break-up with her, cos I was mad and didn't want to see her the next day, and she had got it into her head that it was over, and once she had severed all emotional ties with me, she realised she "didn't need me" and it surprised her, and apparently she has to need someone to be with them. That was it, she did ask me back for some reason a week later, but then for her own reasons changed her mind, she never talked to me about it really though. I have had plenty of offers to go out tonight, but I just felt like a night in, and now I just feel depressed as anything, last thing I feel like doing is partying, and knowing my luck I'd bump into her in town and see her with her new f.uck buddy She was emailing me a few weeks ago and we met for coffee, then she just stopped, i sent her one email 2 weeks back but got no reply after we met... dunno what I've done to make her come across like she hates me now!
scobro Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 That sucks man I hate seeing my ex i see her at the gym it really sets you back.Having yours next door geeeez I would freak out you should leave for the night it will drive you crazy or grab a big bottle of vodka:)
brittanyjean259 Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 if you stay in, you will wallow up your feelings, and get in to abigger hole....i was happy but now that im home and alone i have more time to think about things....and i wish i could get out of the house....sometimes it seems i do stuff out of desperation.....but i dont want to get in to a that feeling...of memories, of AHHHHH and im doing it right now.... well than shes not worth it, yeah feel the pain for a little bit but than realize shes not worth it if she can do that, thats what im trying to tell my self.... now you know you cant go back to her, if she has a *uck buddy........tell your self that,
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 12, 2005 Author Posted November 12, 2005 I feel ok now most of the time, and decided I wasn't going to go out for a while cos everytime I have recently I feel a lot worse after drinking etc. It sort of depresses me, so I decided I wasn't going to party until new year and just look after myself, eat healthy and relax for a month or two now. I was doing so well, just tonight knowing she is behind the wall is so hard. I put my tv on mute before and could hear her laughing at something (we only have thin walls), its getting late here, looks like she's probably staying over there tonight. Just don't get how she can do it, how she can visit this building when she used to stay at mine every night of the week pretty much for the last year, now we don't even talk.. takes a pretty different kind of person to be able to do that and not have any effect on them in my book. I am staying in, I was going to anyway I'm not changing my life for her anymore she is nothing to do with me, just wish I could make her stay away, but I can't tell my neighbor who she can have in her house obviously. Sucks cos myself and my flatmate used to get invited out with my neighbor on nights out, now we don't cos she seems to have taken my ex's side (they work together) so lost a few good friends too. Wish I'd never met my ex to be honest, the memories are not worth this ****.
scobro Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 i have no idea how she can go to the building where you are at and think that thats no big deal.What is up with these friggin people????? god i could never ever do that to someone if i knew they were hurting the last thing I would do is go next door, god how phuking pathetic is that just brutal she will get hers one day I promise Karma will even out.
brittanyjean259 Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 dont sweat anything, because in the end what comes around goes around" thats what they say
brittanyjean259 Posted November 12, 2005 Posted November 12, 2005 me and my ex broke up 3 months ago,,,,,,and a week later after we broke up i had to return to school! had a class with his" girl friend" who has the same name..........( I NEW i would have a class w/ this *ITCH).......sat across the room,,,seeeing her with my favorite shirt of on......( of his)........ i was like demolished by what i was facing.....and than the teacher asked" how was every ones summer"...." did any 1 be happy in some1 els's expense...............( i dont know why he asked that) and she raised her freakking hand.......and looked across the room at me with an evil eye......... now that i think about it....that was the worse feeling ever....after class i imedilty changed " english teachers.....and still was in a daze that my 3 year relationship was over?????? ISNT THAT BRUTAL? i dont know what made me write this......just a share of words
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 13, 2005 Author Posted November 13, 2005 i have no idea how she can go to the building where you are at and think that thats no big deal.What is up with these friggin people????? god i could never ever do that to someone if i knew they were hurting the last thing I would do is go next door, god how phuking pathetic is that just brutal she will get hers one day I promise Karma will even out. She's owed a lot then, she's really hurt and broken the hearts of three guys in the last 2.5 years now, should have spotted the red flags I guess, but she's so cute and innocent acting, and gave me the whole "i love you more than i ever have anyone in my life" etc. Her car is parked outside so she is staying upstairs from me, in the room directly above mine.. it just seems so wierd, how can she park her car where she did until recently, every night this year she stayed at mine pretty much, how can she park there, come into this building, and sleep above me and it not even bother her? It's so odd.. even when I've broken up with people before and thought I was over them, that would have still been uncomfortable to me, we only split about 6 weeks ago. So yeah, feeling very **** tonight, the whole "out of sight, out of mind" thing was helping me lots, but this has set me back a few weeks now I feel. What's worse is there is absolutely nothing I can do about it.
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 13, 2005 Author Posted November 13, 2005 me and my ex broke up 3 months ago,,,,,,and a week later after we broke up i had to return to school! had a class with his" girl friend" who has the same name..........( I NEW i would have a class w/ this *ITCH).......sat across the room,,,seeeing her with my favorite shirt of on......( of his)........ i was like demolished by what i was facing.....and than the teacher asked" how was every ones summer"...." did any 1 be happy in some1 els's expense...............( i dont know why he asked that) and she raised her freakking hand.......and looked across the room at me with an evil eye......... now that i think about it....that was the worse feeling ever....after class i imedilty changed " english teachers.....and still was in a daze that my 3 year relationship was over?????? ISNT THAT BRUTAL? i dont know what made me write this......just a share of words Wow, that is harsh! I hope that karma you were speaking of comes back to her, he'll probably do the same to her as he did to you though, she's only a rebound, I'd give it 4 months tops, then see who's smiling
jomaxfury Posted November 13, 2005 Posted November 13, 2005 Chocolate Boy, Almost the same situation happened to me about three months ago...she made any excuse to let go of me and that's after a 2 year relationship...Now that she is with someone else she is partying, drinking and having her fun while I am here writing my paper on South Asia politics to get my BA. I want to graduate because I don't want to be there with her in the same University... Can't wait to leave. I understand how you are feeling I feel the same way on the weekends, her time to have fun but it's okay...Because I don't need to worry about the her, her issues, or the relationship. ahhh feels so good!!!!
downcydeguy Posted November 13, 2005 Posted November 13, 2005 Just don't get how she can do it, how she can visit this building when she used to stay at mine every night of the week pretty much for the last year, now we don't even talk.. takes a pretty different kind of person to be able to do that and not have any effect on them in my book. Being the dumpER seems to eliminate all guilt or feeling for anything tied to the ex. It is somewhat puzzling that it seems so easy for them to let go of the past. Wish I'd never met my ex to be honest, the memories are not worth this ****.[/QUOTE] I said this to a friend about my ex and he told me I was being rediculous. My response: I could have dated around for these past 2 1/2 years, and still came away with great memories. I wouldn't have to deal with such pain when those relationships ended.
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 13, 2005 Author Posted November 13, 2005 Yeah you're right, they seem not to be affected by it, but if you read my post last week about "This Explains It" it's probably becuase they're either numb or they have surpressed feelings creating a new pseudo-reality for themselves. Saw her again this morning, I was leaving my house getting into my car, and she walked out of my back gate, she'd obviously stayed at my neighbours, I didn't aknowledge I'd seen her, just got in and quickly drove away. Man I feel so down again today, I had been doing so well this week, now I feel awful again... But what can I do? It seems so out of my control, I'm trying to get her out of my mind so I can move on, but how can I when she's staying in the room above me and I see her outside my house? Arghghhhh!!!!
brittanyjean259 Posted November 13, 2005 Posted November 13, 2005 thanks chocklate boy, i know shes rebound...but that doestn matter...he did this any ways...and he could possibly be moving so i tell my self to get over him, the best way i know how.... and you guys should do, these people are just cruel!
scobro Posted November 13, 2005 Posted November 13, 2005 But what can I do? It seems so out of my control, I'm trying to get her out of my mind so I can move on, but how can I when she's staying in the room above me and I see her outside my house? Why don't you consider moving?If she is living above you really consider it if she just drops by now and then not as much of an issue but really if you want her out of your life for good you could look for another place start fresh?
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 13, 2005 Author Posted November 13, 2005 Why don't you consider moving?If she is living above you really consider it if she just drops by now and then not as much of an issue but really if you want her out of your life for good you could look for another place start fresh? Ah no, she's not living there, my neighbor is her boss, so she sometimes goes out with her for nights out and stays there and visits her.. wouldn't care, but they weren't even friends until I got with my ex. She's stayed there three times since we split though, she's not there all the time, just hate seeing her car outside and knowing she's in the room above me sometimes... feel like a prisoner when she's visiting next door, like I don't want to leave the house incase i bump into her... Not a lot I can do though. What seemed like an advantage when we were together (her being friends with my friends) has turned into the worst part of breaking up.
brittanyjean259 Posted November 13, 2005 Posted November 13, 2005 my ex is moving, it hurt when i found out( even though he has a new gf).....but that could be a benifit right?
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 13, 2005 Author Posted November 13, 2005 What about the idea of moving??? I have 6 months left on my lease now, and i hope i'll be over her in 6 months from now (!) so probably not realistic. Although I am considering maybe starting new life somewhere else, not really linked to her, just have wanted to do it for a while and this seems like the perfect kick in the ass I need, but that won't be til next summer. Just doesn't seem any way around this, I can't say to my neighbor who she can have in her house obviously, I guess I'll just have to ride it out.. does REALLY set back my healing though.
Author chocolate_boy Posted November 13, 2005 Author Posted November 13, 2005 If any progress is coming from this, it's making me realise how much she has pissed me off and how angry I am that I can't bear her to be around me... It's all so dissapointing.
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