Gen Z

[ayaj]

I would like some insight into the dating habits of generation z.  If any parents of or gen zs themselves or just someone with first hand knowledge on the topic can provide me with further insight it will be greatly appreciated.

Is it common for a gen z girl, say in the 18-20 range, to have multiple guys in her life that fill multiple roles?

My question comes from insight provided by 1 mother:

"This younger generation stays 'young' much longer than the millennial or generation X. It takes a long time for them to make a clean cut between boyfriend and buddies. What you are describing looks like something my 19 year old would do. She has several guy friends and one of them is her 'school husband', the other one is her 'bestie', the other one they play that mom/son role. Her boyfriend thinks it's all funny because he is also a generation Z like her. He gets it. "

Is what is described above the norm for a gen Z girl?

I have been doing research on gen z in general but information specific to that is hard to find.

Edited January 21, 2024 by smwia30

[Els]

Why are you looking for information about 18-20yo girls in particular....?

Anyway, asking this question is like saying "I would like some insight into the dating habits of 48-50yo men". There isn't really any one answer, as everyone is different. Yes, in general young people (not just Gen Z and not just "girls") are less likely to commit to one person... but that's not exactly anything new. College students have been dating around since colleges were in existence.

[basil67]

Insight from one mother is insight from one mother.   

Gen Z, just like every generation before them has a vast array of different people from different socio economic backgrounds, belief systems, schooling styles and parenting styles.  And then there are different personalities from the girls themselves.

I have a Gen Z daughter and she's not remotely like the person's daughter in your quote.   She's had a handful of boyfriends and while she was committed, she didn't seek other male attention.  Of course she had male mates, but they were just mates....who often had girlfriends anyway.  She dated guys who were her age and up to a couple of years older.  Though I can guarantee that you would have been far to old for her to consider.  Further, when she was single and dating, she refused to multi date  Most of her female friends were in committed relationships during university.

Before you go listening to generalisations made by old people, I suggest you read this https://historyhustle.com/2500-years-of-people-complaining-about-the-younger-generation/  and this https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/52209/15-historical-complaints-about-young-people-ruining-everything  These put everything into perspective

 

Edited January 21, 2024 by basil67

[FredEire]

4 hours ago, smwia30 said:

I would like some insight into the dating habits of generation z.  If any parents of or gen zs themselves or just someone with first hand knowledge on the topic can provide me with further insight it will be greatly appreciated.

Is it common for a gen z girl, say in the 18-20 range, to have multiple guys in her life that fill multiple roles?

My question comes from insight provided by 1 mother:

"This younger generation stays 'young' much longer than the millennial or generation X. It takes a long time for them to make a clean cut between boyfriend and buddies. What you are describing looks like something my 19 year old would do. She has several guy friends and one of them is her 'school husband', the other one is her 'bestie', the other one they play that mom/son role. Her boyfriend thinks it's all funny because he is also a generation Z like her. He gets it. "

Is what is described above the norm for a gen Z girl?

I have been doing research on gen z in general but information specific to that is hard to find.

I'm a young millennial but am the oldest in my family and know several people in that age range.

In my opinion things are only getting more confusing. Young people are getting more promiscuous/sexless (especially for young men it seems to be either one of these with very little in the middle), more confused, more emotionally isolated, traditional relationships are devalued and open relationships or FWB is becoming the norm.

In my opinion it's a bubble that's got to pop at some point, either in gen Z or the next.

[an0nym0us123]

A lot older than 18 but the whole dating scene looks pretty much destroyed by dating apps and social media. Everyone chasing the Instagram lifestyle, anything less than perfect is seen as failure. Hence why numbers of single people are rocketing. Lots of dynamics at play, glad I'm not involved

[FredEire]

4 minutes ago, an0nym0us123 said:

A lot older than 18 but the whole dating scene looks pretty much destroyed by dating apps and social media. Everyone chasing the Instagram lifestyle, anything less than perfect is seen as failure. Hence why numbers of single people are rocketing. Lots of dynamics at play, glad I'm not involved

Indeed. I'm 30 now and during my younger years chasing after sex was really glorified, it's only once you start to see people get dating burnout and experience it yourself you start to question the culture a little bit.

Even my friends who elected for a long term relationship early don't seem very satisfied and many seem to do it for the sake of it without the emotional maturity to develop it into something healthy and long lasting. I'd expect many divorces in my generation as we get into middle age.

The internet has brought a huge breakdown in human communication generally and I can only see it getting worse in the short term.

[ayaj]

12 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

You mentioned you're afraid this schoolgirl you're seeing will take advantage of you financially. There are really no generalizations you'researching for in lieu of actually asking her. 

it's very peculiar that you are asking all over about her age group, videos and everything else as if you don't know her. 

Lets keep this thread just about insights into gen z. My other thread has so much going on I would rather keep the two fairly separate. It is normal for me to do a lot of research before making any major life decision and at the moment the decision I am making is whether or not to end it. I think it comes across as I don't know her because she spends half of her time at her school and up until now I had no idea what went on there. Forgive my old brain but when we would talk about her school program my questions and conversations always focused on the academic side of it. Then you add in me not using social media and obviously there is a lot I was missing.

I'm also not going all over the place asking about gen z. My other thread started was not originally focused on the gen z part. I have asked in this thread about gen z (makes sense to title it for the subject) and have listened to 2 professionally written audio books about the generation. It is normal for me to pursue information in all subjects that are relevant to my life or even just interest me really.

Edited January 21, 2024 by smwia30

[ShyViolet]

One thing that really annoys me, and I notice people doing it a lot in today's culture, is putting so much emphasis on these generation labels.  I see so many social media posts about "Gen Z does this.... Millenials do this.... Boomers do this..."  It's just really silly and it's not actually accurate.  People don't fit into these neat categories based on their age range.  You can't generalize that "Get Z" people all do a certain thing and "Millenials" do another.  Try not to fixate so much on generalizations.  They are not accurate.

[Rider on the Storm]

5 hours ago, Els said:

Why are you looking for information about 18-20yo girls in particular....?

 

I think a more honest thread title would have been, "I'm older, but still want to pursue 18-20 year old girls. Help me to do that".

Edited January 21, 2024 by Rider on the Storm

[Kassieee]

4 hours ago, an0nym0us123 said:

A lot older than 18 but the whole dating scene looks pretty much destroyed by dating apps and social media. Everyone chasing the Instagram lifestyle, anything less than perfect is seen as failure. Hence why numbers of single people are rocketing. Lots of dynamics at play, glad I'm not involved

 

4 hours ago, FredEire said:

Indeed. I'm 30 now and during my younger years chasing after sex was really glorified, it's only once you start to see people get dating burnout and experience it yourself you start to question the culture a little bit.

Even my friends who elected for a long term relationship early don't seem very satisfied and many seem to do it for the sake of it without the emotional maturity to develop it into something healthy and long lasting. I'd expect many divorces in my generation as we get into middle age.

The internet has brought a huge breakdown in human communication generally and I can only see it getting worse in the short term.

^^Facts.

 

Also, the mother in OP sounds naive.

Parents see their kids through a different lens. And children don't tell their parents everything at this age especially. 

 

[Alpacalia]

Gen Z – known for their love of avocado toast and their constant connection to technology. They're the multitasking masters of swiping left and right while munching on their 'gram-worthy brunch. They make dating look like a game of Candy Crush. But don't be fooled, they may seem casual and carefree, but they're actually the most strategic and selective daters out there.

So swipe carefully and don't forget to hashtag #relationshipgoals.

😅

[ayaj]

One of the things mentioned in the book I listened to said that unlike millennials who grew up living their life in the moment, gen z is actually much more likely to be planning their lives ahead of time.

[Alpacalia]

7 hours ago, basil67 said:

Insight from one mother is insight from one mother.   

Gen Z, just like every generation before them has a vast array of different people from different socio economic backgrounds, belief systems, schooling styles and parenting styles.  And then there are different personalities from the girls themselves.

I have a Gen Z daughter and she's not remotely like the person's daughter in your quote.   She's had a handful of boyfriends and while she was committed, she didn't seek other male attention.  Of course she had male mates, but they were just mates....who often had girlfriends anyway.  She dated guys who were her age and up to a couple of years older.  Though I can guarantee that you would have been far to old for her to consider.  Further, when she was single and dating, she refused to multi date  Most of her female friends were in committed relationships during university.

Before you go listening to generalisations made by old people, I suggest you read this https://historyhustle.com/2500-years-of-people-complaining-about-the-younger-generation/  and this https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/52209/15-historical-complaints-about-young-people-ruining-everything  These put everything into perspective

 

Indeed. My two nieces are Gen Z and they both received scholarships for sports, one surfing, the other running. They both have p/t jobs, one in a surf shop, the other in a beachside deli.

Their parents would NEVER allow them to date someone in their 30s. They also are not social media 24/7...so sure, generalizations can be dangerous. But, for Ted's age, it's possible Gen Z is easier targets for his "message" thanks to social media.

Edited January 21, 2024 by Alpacalia

[FredEire]

3 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

One thing that really annoys me, and I notice people doing it a lot in today's culture, is putting so much emphasis on these generation labels.  I see so many social media posts about "Gen Z does this.... Millenials do this.... Boomers do this..."  It's just really silly and it's not actually accurate.  People don't fit into these neat categories based on their age range.  You can't generalize that "Get Z" people all do a certain thing and "Millenials" do another.  Try not to fixate so much on generalizations.  They are not accurate.

I agree to an extent. I also think there's too many labels put on relationships now like "toxic" that over-generalise when every individual case is different.

However I think it's undeniable that different generations have different attitudes to just about everything because of the environment they grew up in. There's no doubt that my generation for example is worlds apart from say that of my grandparents where nobody dated around (at least in the open) as this was extremely taboo, and the vast majority were married with kids on the way by 22/23 years old.

Of course you can't just say "all millennials do X" or "all gen Z do Y" but there are definitely societal trends that push the individual to behave one way or another.

Edited January 21, 2024 by FredEire

[ayaj]

5 minutes ago, Rider on the Storm said:

Are you able to outline some reasons for your low self worth which have lead to you wanting to take advantage of barely legal, inexperienced women with cultural barriers? I'm middle aged and have a decent amount of disposal income, but I don't think I'm what's best for an 18 year old. Why do you feel like you are unable to get women without manipulating or buying them? 

In my mind I actually met this girl by chance and have been open minded for her of the age gap the way she is of me. This thread was not supposed to be about that though and I doubt it gets back on track so a moderator could even lock it.

[Rider on the Storm]

1 minute ago, smwia30 said:

In my mind I actually met this girl by chance and have been open minded for her of the age gap the way she is of me. This thread was not supposed to be about that though and I doubt it gets back on track so a moderator could even lock it.

In fairness, I think we are on topic of what this thread was supposed to be about. You came here asking others for advice on how to take advantage of young, inexperienced girls with cultural barriers. You just attempted to cleverly disguise it in a way that it wouldn't come off as smarmy and sinister. Some of us are simply pointing out why this wouldn't be considered normal, ethical behavior for many. Out of curiosity, have you been treated for mental health issues in the past?

[ayaj]

1 minute ago, Rider on the Storm said:

In fairness, I think we are on topic of what this thread was supposed to be about. You came here asking others for advice on how to take advantage of young, inexperienced girls with cultural barriers. You just attempted to cleverly disguise it in a way that it wouldn't come off as smarmy and sinister. Some of us are simply pointing out why this wouldn't be considered normal, ethical behavior for many. Out of curiosity, have you been treated for mental health issues in the past?

The topic here was for general information about the dating habits of a generation yes. It was an attempt to help me understand 1 specific girl better who was already involved in my life at the time. I am not looking to go around hitting on every gen z or inexperienced girl I see and quite frankly if it does not work out with this girl I will not be getting involved with that age group again even if it happened by chance.

[Rider on the Storm]

15 minutes ago, smwia30 said:

The topic here was for general information about the dating habits of a generation yes. It was an attempt to help me understand 1 specific girl better who was already involved in my life at the time. I am not looking to go around hitting on every gen z or inexperienced girl I see and quite frankly if it does not work out with this girl I will not be getting involved with that age group again even if it happened by chance.

What do you need to better understand exactly? This is a teenage girl who is likely 10-15 years younger than you. She has a boyfriend. It sounds like cultural or language barriers exist. You’re giving her money under the guise of “I can afford to, so it’s ok”. You’re on a public forum inquiring how you can better manipulate this situation. 
 

Does any of this sound normal or healthy to you? 

[basil67]

1 hour ago, Alpacalia said:

Gen Z – known for their love of avocado toast and their constant connection to technology. They're the multitasking masters of swiping left and right while munching on their 'gram-worthy brunch. They make dating look like a game of Candy Crush. But don't be fooled, they may seem casual and carefree, but they're actually the most strategic and selective daters out there.

So swipe carefully and don't forget to hashtag #relationshipgoals.

😅

Nah, that's gen Y.  Aussie Boomers say that the reason Y can't afford homes here is because of avo toast.   

Apparently gen Z is pulling right back on the insta-dumps and being more private.  

Edited January 21, 2024 by basil67

[Alpacalia]

2 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Nah, that's gen Y.  Aussie Boomers say that the reason Y can't afford homes here is because of avo toast.   

Apparently gen Z is pulling right back on the insta-dumps and being more private.  

Some. My nieces included, then again, their parents are millionaires so they don't need to prove anything, unlike the poor kids who are pawning their sisters fortnite outfits to buy a heap of toolies from North Sydney.

Edited January 21, 2024 by Alpacalia

[Rider on the Storm]

6 minutes ago, smwia30 said:

Well I have actually lived for an extended period of time (years) previously in the country her parents have immigrated from. What is normal or healthy to someone can be influenced by their life experiences. Not everyone in the world thinks the same way.

Can you share some of the experiences that have lead to you thinking that buying young, inexperienced girls is ok? 

When was the last time you had a girlfriend that you didn’t have to manipulate or buy? 

[ayaj]

Just now, Rider on the Storm said:

Can you share some of the experiences that have lead to you thinking that buying young, inexperienced girls is ok? 

When was the last time you had a girlfriend that you didn’t have to manipulate or buy? 

I have never been in this specific scenario before myself but I have had friends of her culture that have similar experiences.

[Lisa]

Thread closed. A discussion of Gen Z stereotypes will not assist OP's relationship

Comments directed at OP's relationship have been split and added to that thread

 

 

Edited January 21, 2024 by Lisa