Tdog Posted November 10, 2005 Posted November 10, 2005 I will try and make a long story short. I was with my childs father for 16 years. We could never seem to get along. I was fed up and wanted to leave. I met this guy 14 years my senior and he took an interest in me and my problems. I talked, he listened. He told me things I needed to hear. He insisted on helping out financially so I could leave. Before you knew it we were sleeping together while I was still living with my ex. The first time we did it I was intoxicated, I kind of felt like he took advantage, but I could tell he felt guilty so I didn't want to make him feel worse and I didn't say anything to him. I got an apt. and within 6 months he talked me into moving in with him. He really liked me and I liked him and I was having a hard time fianncially so I agreed. Anything I could do to try and get over my ex-I thought. Nine months after, we were married. In between that time I tried to call it off twice but he was brokenhearted, and stuff was already paid for so I went ahead and did it. Now I wished I hadn't. We have only been married 6 months. I moved out a couple of months ago but moved back in for all the wrong reasons. First he took my car, that is in his name, that he picked out but I pay for. I had no bed or furniture in my apt. and he kept saying come home, I could hardly pay the rent on my salary. So after 3 months I did. I am miserable. I Miss my ex. (who is willing to do anything to get us back). My husband hates that I'm messy, thinks I'm to easy on my child, gripes all the time about my finances (which are also messy), is constantly spying on me (checking my phone, having the ex watched), never takes me out and never really did. He is usually at the neighborhood bar with friends, never invites me. And basically we don't have S**t in common. I want to go, but am scared of hurting and embarrasing him, I'm worried my child will be sad and I don't know if I can make it out on my own as a single mother. I want to stay for the next 9 months and save all my money so i can just go. Somebody, please give me some advice.
scobro Posted November 10, 2005 Posted November 10, 2005 wow sticky situation.You miss your ex but can't stand your husband.You really need to look at what is best for you not what is going to embarass your husband.Do what will work in yours and your kids best interests.
Becoming Posted November 16, 2005 Posted November 16, 2005 Do you have to have a man to make it? Sounds like there are serious $$ problems that cause you to make decisions part of you doesn't want. You're worth honoring all of you. If you want to get back with your ex, do so under some conditions. It sounds like you want to go out, have him home more. It sounds like he might like it if you were less messy. Know what YOU want and negotiate for it and actively pursue it instead of hoping someone else will give it to you. You're in a tough spot, but you really can do this. Fear doesn't have to rule your life. Courage, then. All the best!
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