What should I do when me and a girl love eachother but she still has feelings for someone else

[thefreshprince]

Hello everyone! I’m kind of in a weird predicament at the moment, I (24m) have finally admitted my love to this lady (25f) after we originally cut things off in February. We were falling for each other very hard but I had some serious things happen in my personal life that I had to focus my attention on. Yeah I know it sounds cliche but I told her about what was going on and she told me understood. As we were no longer talking, I couldn’t get her off my mind and felt as if I didn’t give us a fair shot so we started talking again back in November. Things were going good and we both agreed that we should see eachother during the holidays and that’s when I told her everything that I’ve been feeling and how I know I was falling in love with her in February and she reciprocated that back and I confessed my love for her. That felt nice and we told each other we loved each other but she told me that she met someone over the summer that she caught feelings for (she doesn’t love the guy) but he had a job offer in another country after they were seeing eachother for about 2 months and kind of left her high and dry. She says she wants to pursue things with me and tells me she loves me but tells me that she doesn’t feel deserving of the love I give her because she still has feelings for this other guy. My question to yall is what do you think I should do in regard to helping her process these feelings for him and maybe give her the closure she never got. Should she talk to him? Or should we just keep pursuing things with each other and hope that these feelings disappear? I know it’s a lot but I really would like some outside opinions from my friends hahaha

[Wiseman2]

2 hours ago, thefreshprince said:

. She says she wants to pursue things with me and tells me she loves me but tells me that she doesn’t feel deserving of the love I give her because she still has feelings for this other guy. 

Are you dating and seeing each other regularly? All you can do is slow down.  You can't really "help her" process a breakup. Especially if she's still talking to or has feelings for this guy. 

What you can is avoid too much too soon and avoid suffocating or convincing her. Step back and give her some room to breathe, process and come to you in her own time. 

 

[d0nnivain]

5 hours ago, thefreshprince said:

My question to yall is what do you think I should do in regard to helping her process these feelings for him and maybe give her the closure she never got. Should she talk to him? Or should we just keep pursuing things with each other and hope that these feelings disappear? I know it’s a lot but I really would like some outside opinions from my friends hahaha

Nobody can give her closure.  She has to find that for herself.  

If she still has feelings for somebody else all you can do is let her go.  She's using you as a rebound & fall back position.  She's taking advantage of your feelings for her to get over the fact that she can't have him.  If he hadn't relocated for work, she'd still be with him not you.