He talks about sex but ?

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

1 minute ago, NuevoYorko said:

And don't forget to mention this part of the conversation from the OP:  "He reacts oddly when I show him pictures of myself  and my cousin in lingerie.  Will he judge me if I send him nudes?"

And ... OP said she's "talking to a Muslim man" and basically they show each other lewd pictures.  Yes she said they date every week but that's not "talking" and it seems like all that really happens is that they are swapping naughty pictures.

Seems like it's what they both like doing.

I just wish OP would leave her cousin out if it though.  That is downright creepy. 

Nobody was in a lingerie. Stop making things up.

And no I don't send him naughty pics. He did.

[introverted1]

There are many men -- usually men who are from a culture with strict rules about appropriate behavior for women -- who think it is fine for men to have lots of sex but not for women to do the same.  These men put women into two categories:  the ones they f*** and the ones they marry.  This isn't new and it surely doesn't take 3 pages of posts to figure out.  If you want to become one of the women he has sex with and then discards, carry on.  Otherwise, find a more suitable dating prospect. 

[NuevoYorko]

1 hour ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

I want to give him a chance.

But I feel like if I send him nudes etc he will judge me 

Since your main criteria for dating appears to be how he will respond to you sending him nudes, this is not the guy.

But, there are literally millions of guys who will welcome you sending them nudes.  Just start sending them out.  I think you'll find plenty of men who will welcome that.

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

1 minute ago, introverted1 said:

There are many men -- usually men who are from a culture with strict rules about appropriate behavior for women -- who think it is fine for men to have lots of sex but not for women to do the same.  These men put women into two categories:  the ones they f*** and the ones they marry.  This isn't new and it surely doesn't take 3 pages of posts to figure out.  If you want to become one of the women he has sex with and then discards, carry on.  Otherwise, find a more suitable dating prospect. 

If I don't have sex with him will he consider me?

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

Just now, NuevoYorko said:

Since your main criteria for dating appears to be how he will respond to you sending him nudes, this is not the guy.

But, there are literally millions of guys who will welcome you sending them nudes.  Just start sending them out.  I think you'll find plenty of men who will welcome that.

I am.not sending him nudes nor do I want to

[NuevoYorko]

4 minutes ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

I am.not sending him nudes nor do I want to

Then why are you posting this:

Quote

But I feel like if I send him nudes etc he will judge me 

 

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

Just now, NuevoYorko said:

Then why are you posting this:

 

Just because I said something doesn't mean I will 

[NuevoYorko]

1 minute ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

Just because I said something doesn't mean I will 

Ok.  So this is just a scenario that doesn't have any basis in reality.    Why are you posting here?

 

[stillafool]

What is it that you are looking for from this forum?  You reject all ideas people here are giving you.  What are you looking for?

Edited December 26, 2023 by stillafool

[stillafool]

13 minutes ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

If I don't have sex with him will he consider me?

How can anyone answer this question but him?

[Alpacalia]

1 hour ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

I like him, he's financially stable and I like older men that's why 

Well, sometimes people sell their souls to the devil for a little bit of money. Sounds like you're willing to compromise your values and boundaries for financial stability and an older, lewd man. Congratulations, I guess. 

Edited December 26, 2023 by Alpacalia

[BaileyB]

23 minutes ago, introverted1 said:

There are many men -- usually men who are from a culture with strict rules about appropriate behavior for women -- who think it is fine for men to have lots of sex but not for women to do the same.  These men put women into two categories:  the ones they f*** and the ones they marry.  This isn't new and it surely doesn't take 3 pages of posts to figure out.  If you want to become one of the women he has sex with and then discards, carry on.  Otherwise, find a more suitable dating prospect. 

Exactly! This kind of behavior is as old as time, and continues today in many religious and cultural groups. It’s really not difficult to understand, unless you are trying to justify the decision to date a man who clearly believes in this double standard and has little respect for women. 

Edited December 26, 2023 by BaileyB

[NuevoYorko]

22 minutes ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

If I don't have sex with him will he consider me?

Consider you for what?  Marriage?  

It sounds like he's already considering you for dating, as you go out weekly and the sexy picture swapping.  I think you're already not "marriage material" if he's comfortable showing you pictures of women giving men oral sex.  That's not exactly typical early dating behavior in any culture.

You know he's Muslim - that's the only trait about him you felt was important to share here, in fact.   Maybe it would be worthwhile to Google about gender roles, dating, and pre-marital traditions in Islamic cultures.  

 

Edited December 26, 2023 by NuevoYorko

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

13 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said:

Consider you for what?  Marriage?  

It sounds like he's already considering you for dating, as you go out weekly and the sexy picture swapping.  I think you're already not "marriage material" if he's comfortable showing you pictures of women giving men oral sex.  That's not exactly typical early dating behavior in any culture.

You know he's Muslim - that's the only trait about him you felt was important to share here, in fact.   Maybe it would be worthwhile to Google about gender roles, dating, and pre-marital traditions in Islamic cultures.  

 

It's not women giving men, it's men giving women and I dont share such images, he shows saying he likes these positions and how he's done various things which he finds enjoyable. I don't say I like these or enjoy them

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

28 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said:

Ok.  So this is just a scenario that doesn't have any basis in reality.    Why are you posting here?

 

Just because I posted this means it's not real. You can stop answering now.

[NuevoYorko]

1 minute ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

It's not women giving men, it's men giving women and I dont share such images, he shows saying he likes these positions and how he's done various things which he finds enjoyable. I don't say I like these or enjoy them

Being available to view pornographic pictures with a guy you don't really even know sends a big message to the guy.   I'm surprised you're not aware of this.

How old are you?  Have you dated before?

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

3 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said:

Being available to view pornographic pictures with a guy you don't really even know sends a big message to the guy.   I'm surprised you're not aware of this.

How old are you?  Have you dated before?

Doesn't send any message to him because he sends images to me and i don't say anything to him on that, he just goes on saying he likes this and I change topics or simply give laughing emojis.  I have never sent him any such images myself 

Dated many times and know more than you

Edited December 26, 2023 by Meangreenmysterymachine

[stillafool]

5 minutes ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

It's not women giving men, it's men giving women and I dont share such images, he shows saying he likes these positions and how he's done various things which he finds enjoyable. I don't say I like these or enjoy them

Why don't you tell him to stop showing you these disgusting pictures?  Tell him if he's interested in you to let you know in a respectable way by asking you out on a date.

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

Dated many times and know more than you

If this is the case you don't need this forum, you already know what's up.

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

Just now, stillafool said:

Why don't you tell him to stop showing you these disgusting pictures?  Tell him if he's interested in you to let you know in a respectable way by asking you out on a date.

We have been on dates and he's has actually spent quite a bit on lunches, coffees etc.

I don't say anything to not offend him but I did tell him that certain images are too graphic and he deleted it 

[Calmandfocused]

17 hours ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

He shares explicit images of naked women receiving oral from men then why do all this judging

Hmmm…. I wonder if he’d be sending you the same explicit images if you were a woman of Islamic faith who wore a hijab? ….

I think not!

I can’t speak for other countries of the world but I can tell you in the U.K.  there’s cultural pockets  of Islamic men seeking non Islamic females for sex, then when they want to settle down (either by choice or persuasion) they marry a virgin Islamic woman.  
 

This man’s intentions towards you are crystal clear. He wants sex with you. End of. 
 

If you don’t want to be used as a sexual plaything and are seeking a meaningful relationship, I’d suggest you look elsewhere. 

 

 

 

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

4 minutes ago, Calmandfocused said:

Hmmm…. I wonder if he’d be sending you the same explicit images if you were a woman of Islamic faith who wore a hijab? ….

I think not!

I can’t speak for other countries of the world but I can tell you in the U.K.  there’s cultural pockets  of Islamic men seeking non Islamic females for sex, then when they want to settle down (either by choice or persuasion) they marry a virgin Islamic woman.  
 

This man’s intentions towards you are crystal clear. He wants sex with you. End of. 
 

If you don’t want to be used as a sexual plaything and are seeking a meaningful relationship, I’d suggest you look elsewhere. 

 

 

 

He was already married but divorced .

He hasnt taken me home nor wants to. So how can he have sex? Also he mocks other women including Muslim hijab colleague of ours who was acting unhinged by saying she's a virgin at 40, doesn't have a man and should get a vibrator to enjoy herself 

[stillafool]

1 minute ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

 

He hasnt taken me home nor wants to. So how can he have sex? Also he mocks other women including Muslim hijab colleague of ours who was acting unhinged by saying she's a virgin at 40, doesn't have a man and should get a vibrator to enjoy herself 

This guy is thoroughly disgusting.  I don't know what you see in this creep.  He will never respect you or any woman.

[Alpacalia]

3 minutes ago, Meangreenmysterymachine said:

He was already married but divorced .

He hasnt taken me home nor wants to. So how can he have sex? Also he mocks other women including Muslim hijab colleague of ours who was acting unhinged by saying she's a virgin at 40, doesn't have a man and should get a vibrator to enjoy herself 

He's sending these photos because you're allowing him to and I think he gets off on the fact that you're letting him. He's probably not been intimate with you yet on purpose so he's just teasing you and you seem to enjoy it so you're just feeding into this absurdist behavior. Seriously, stop responding or reacting to this stuff and I think he'll be disheartened and move on.

You need to take a serious look at this situation because there's nothing about this guy that is attractive.

Edited December 26, 2023 by Alpacalia

[Meangreenmysterymachine]

1 minute ago, Alpacalia said:

He's sending these photos because you're allowing him to and I think he gets off on the fact that you're letting him. He's probably not been intimate with you yet so he's just teasing you. You need to take a serious look at this situation because there's nothing about this guy that is attractive.

He already says teasing you nothing real or serious. I have told him to delete some very graphic ones and for the rest I only give laughing emojis or stay quiet