uncanny Posted October 12, 2023 Posted October 12, 2023 (edited) I moved to a very multicultural city and I'm in the process of finding a room to rent. I went check out this house this week and was shown around by this friendly vietnamese woman around my age in her 30s. There was a guy renovating the house who was also super friendly and chatty. I soon realized they were probably together despite the fact it was odd as he could pass as her dad. He's a local, not an immigrant. She has a kid too. So days go by when I haven't made up my mind so I send her a message asking if said room is still up for grabs. She says it's been taken. But then proceeds to send me a message saying One thing I want to say to you is you are really handsome and have such a beautiful smile. This followed by a cheerful/smiley emoji. Well, what the heck? Isn't this at best inappropriate considering she's likely with this other guy? Edited October 12, 2023 by uncanny
stillafool Posted October 12, 2023 Posted October 12, 2023 1 minute ago, uncanny said: Isn't this at best inappropriate considering she's likely with his other guy? Yes, so beware of getting involved with her. 1
Wiseman2 Posted October 12, 2023 Posted October 12, 2023 52 minutes ago, uncanny said: . But then proceeds to send me a message saying One thing I want to say to you is you are really handsome and have such a beautiful smile. This followed by a cheerful/smiley emoji. It's good you didn't take the room. Seems like a weird messy situation. It really doesn't matter what their relationship or culture is. What's weird is the situation itself and the cheeky message. 2
Author uncanny Posted October 12, 2023 Author Posted October 12, 2023 6 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: It's good you didn't take the room. Seems like a weird messy situation. It really doesn't matter what their relationship or culture is. What's weird is the situation itself and the cheeky message. Well, I wouldn't see anything wrong with the message if they weren't together. Plus she knew I wouldn't be moving in. Not like I can straight out ask her if they are indeed together. I found her attractive too
stillafool Posted October 12, 2023 Posted October 12, 2023 1 minute ago, uncanny said: Well, I wouldn't see anything wrong with the message if they weren't together. Plus she knew I wouldn't be moving in. Not like I can straight out ask her if they are indeed together Why not? 1
Author uncanny Posted October 12, 2023 Author Posted October 12, 2023 1 minute ago, stillafool said: Why not? Cause if they indeed are and I misinterpreted a friendly remark it could get ugly
Wiseman2 Posted October 12, 2023 Posted October 12, 2023 2 minutes ago, uncanny said: Cause if they indeed are and I misinterpreted a friendly remark it could get ugly Why not bypass the whole situation? It doesn't seem worth pursuing. 1
CollinW Posted October 18, 2023 Posted October 18, 2023 (edited) What made you come to the conclusion they were together? You could ask her what her situation is with the guy there. Edited October 18, 2023 by CollinW
Alvi Posted October 20, 2023 Posted October 20, 2023 Is she the only one woman on this planet? There must be other women in your proximity that you can go on a dates with. Are you on any dating sites? If not, why don't you make a good profile with some nice pics of yourself and start chatting and meeting women. Do you have any friends or relatives that could fix you up with somebody?
Gaeta Posted October 20, 2023 Posted October 20, 2023 Try to be slow to judgement toward people you know nothing about. They may be in an open relationship, she may have asked this man permission to flirt with you, maybe she is just unfiltered and wanted to give you a sincere compliment. You just don't know & it doesn't matter as you did not get the room. 2
Els Posted October 22, 2023 Posted October 22, 2023 It's not a cultural clash. Women in Vietnam typically don't come on to local men aggressively like that. It's most definitely a "this specific woman does this" thing. 1
MsJayne Posted October 22, 2023 Posted October 22, 2023 Not enough info. The man may have been her father, she may be a single mother. She may be on the lookout for a man to look after her and her child. Foreign men are well regarded in those parts of the world as potentially good providers, so if you aim to get involved with a local woman be prepared to shell out.
basil67 Posted October 22, 2023 Posted October 22, 2023 On 10/13/2023 at 1:41 AM, uncanny said: There was a guy renovating the house who was also super friendly and chatty. I soon realized they were probably together despite the fact it was odd as he could pass as her dad Without more information, that's quite an assumption. Were they being openly affectionate?
glows Posted October 23, 2023 Posted October 23, 2023 I read this as a friendly compliment. I don’t see it as any interest in you or that you are hot or anything. Nor did I see anything inappropriate in the least! I compliment someone on their clothing or how beautiful their eyes are. Someone the other day commented on my “natural beauty” whatever that means but very kind! Maybe you don’t get compliments often and this spooked you? I wouldn’t even have made any link that this was a couple especially if you met them only once briefly. I think you’re reading into this too much. 1
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