GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 I matched with a guy my age on facebook dating, he said he's looking for a relationship and has been single for a while. I told him my situation with my ex. I asked him if we could call tomorrow meaning today. He said “we can, it would have to be around 10pm” I replied with “that’s fine” he said “talk to you tomorrow, gonna sleep soon” I said “okay:)” it’s 3pm and still nothing for him. I don’t want to text him, because that would be needy from my end. I’m just kinda worried he decided to ghost me lol. Should I delete his contact and unmatch him?
OurLoveTurnsToRust Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 He said he was going to talk to you at 10, if it's only 3, what's the problem? 3
ExpatInItaly Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 14 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: I told him my situation with my ex What situation is this? 15 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: y. He said “we can, it would have to be around 10pm” I replied with “that’s fine” he said “talk to you tomorrow, gonna sleep soon” I said “okay:)” it’s 3pm and still nothing for him. He said you would talk around 10, and it's only 3. I don't get why you expect to have heard from him already, unless I am not understanding something.
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 3 minutes ago, OurLoveTurnsToRust said: He said he was going to talk to you at 10, if it's only 3, what's the problem? I assume he meant he would text me, i didn’t think he actually meant he would “talk” i’m just feeling a bit overwhelmed by him. he is very attractive and muscular he said it himself, that many woman want to sleep with him but not take him seriously. i’m not ugly but i definitely am not that in shape compared to him.
ExpatInItaly Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 Just now, GoodVibess said: I assume he meant he would text me Where did you get that from? He was clear that you would talk at 10pm. You're inventing problems here. 1
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 3 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: What situation is this? He said you would talk around 10, and it's only 3. I don't get why you expect to have heard from him already, unless I am not understanding something. I have posted about my ex before on here if you look at my other posts. The relationship wasn’t good. I think i’m just feeling insecure cuz no one this attractive has ever talked to me. Unless he’s lying about a relationship and trying to get me to sleep with him i don’t know how to react.
ExpatInItaly Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 Just now, GoodVibess said: I have posted about my ex before on here if you look at my other posts. The relationship wasn’t good. Why did you feel the need to tell this man about it? You don't know him. He doesn't know you. It's not a good look to come to the table iwith any talk about an ex. In fact, most would find that a turn-off. 2
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 1 minute ago, ExpatInItaly said: Why did you feel the need to tell this man about it? You don't know him. He doesn't know you. It's not a good look to come to the table iwith any talk about an ex. In fact, most would find that a turn-off. we were discussing previous relationships
ExpatInItaly Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 8 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: we were discussing previous relationships Try to avoid this when you don't even know the person. Only very general details, if you must. In any case, you need to be patient. I am not sure why you assume he'd text you today, as that's not what he said. So, see what happens later around the time you two agreed to speak. 2
smackie9 Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 (edited) 39 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: I assume he meant he would text me, i didn’t think he actually meant he would “talk” i’m just feeling a bit overwhelmed by him. he is very attractive and muscular he said it himself, that many woman want to sleep with him but not take him seriously. i’m not ugly but i definitely am not that in shape compared to him. No hot guys says that honestly. I would think this is catfishing. If it's too good to be true it probably is. You're anxiousness could lead you down a road of being bamboozled. Protect yourself...don't send any provocative photos of yourself or money/personal information. Edited June 14, 2023 by smackie9 3
MsJayne Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 So, you've had a chat with someone you matched with on a dating ap. He probably also matched with fifty other women. Likely he's going on a date with one of them and that's why he's not available until after 10 pm. I wouldn't hold my breath waiting, and if he does call you at a late hour you should do yourself a huge favour and not answer. Don't be available to people who treat you like a convenience. 1
Ami1uwant Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 (edited) 49 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: we were discussing previous relationships Don’t do this before you even are done with the first meet up. you can talk about generalities like “ I had a relationship of 3 years that ending 6 months ago”. You don’t have to get into the details of why it ended. Edited June 14, 2023 by Ami1uwant 1
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 3 minutes ago, MsJayne said: So, you've had a chat with someone you matched with on a dating ap. He probably also matched with fifty other women. Likely he's going on a date with one of them and that's why he's not available until after 10 pm. I wouldn't hold my breath waiting, and if he does call you at a late hour you should do yourself a huge favour and not answer. Don't be available to people who treat you like a convenience. I didn’t think about it in that way, Im usually only able to talk at 9 or 10 as well because I live with parents and rather not talk when they’re awake. He said he works full time and goes to the gym a lot.
Wiseman2 Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 53 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: he said it himself, that many woman want to sleep with him Wait to see if he contacts you, but don't overlook red flags like this.
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 3 minutes ago, Ami1uwant said: Don’t do this before you even are done with the first meet up. you can talk about generalities like “ I had a relationship of 3 years that ending 6 months ago”. You don’t have to get into the details of why it ended. I didn’t really go much into detail. I just said he blocked me and never heard from him since. I also said I have been working on myself as well like he has.
Ageless Wisdom23 Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 Give it some time today and tonight and in a few days if you hear Nothing, Consider him rude and crude and perhaps have move don someone else. It happens on these dating sites.
Versacehottie Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 2 hours ago, GoodVibess said: we were discussing previous relationships IMO this is not how to begin a relationship. It not anything to bond over unless you want to be melancholy and seem like you are about drama/negative things. In fact, consider the top quality that GETS people into relationships: they have fun and enjoy spending time with you. Talking about heavy stuff right off the bat like you are a broken bird is going to get you nowhere; if you somehow happen to make it to the first date, you've already signaled you are the type to be mistreated. You can even see how he's dragging his feet with you, making it "conditional"...for example, "it will have to be after 10pm"...he's treating you like an OBLIGATION already. I don't know how his vibe was but I can sort of tell yours from how you are describing the interaction here. Also I would say you are putting far too much importance and getting ahead of yourself with thinking this below. 3 hours ago, GoodVibess said: he said he's looking for a relationship and has been single for a while His actions say, he might be dragging his feet and you just don't know yet. And just because someone says they want or are open to a relationship doesn't mean because you are in contact with him and there is the slightest interest that it will proceed as if that is the green light and only factor. Unmatching him is equally silly because you are sort of treating things like they are an on/off switch. IMO, you need to chill out and slow down with anyone...and don't bring up your ex into beginning conversations. If you really feel like it was that traumatic then you need to deal with that separately from your current dating relationships so you don't present yourself as someone who needs saving and is broken. Lol, are you GoodVibess? 1
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 31 minutes ago, Versacehottie said: IMO this is not how to begin a relationship. It not anything to bond over unless you want to be melancholy and seem like you are about drama/negative things. In fact, consider the top quality that GETS people into relationships: they have fun and enjoy spending time with you. Talking about heavy stuff right off the bat like you are a broken bird is going to get you nowhere; if you somehow happen to make it to the first date, you've already signaled you are the type to be mistreated. You can even see how he's dragging his feet with you, making it "conditional"...for example, "it will have to be after 10pm"...he's treating you like an OBLIGATION already. I don't know how his vibe was but I can sort of tell yours from how you are describing the interaction here. Also I would say you are putting far too much importance and getting ahead of yourself with thinking this below. His actions say, he might be dragging his feet and you just don't know yet. And just because someone says they want or are open to a relationship doesn't mean because you are in contact with him and there is the slightest interest that it will proceed as if that is the green light and only factor. Unmatching him is equally silly because you are sort of treating things like they are an on/off switch. IMO, you need to chill out and slow down with anyone...and don't bring up your ex into beginning conversations. If you really feel like it was that traumatic then you need to deal with that separately from your current dating relationships so you don't present yourself as someone who needs saving and is broken. Lol, are you GoodVibess? What am I supposed to do? Text him “how’s your day going” I rather not say anything to him, I do know if a man is interested they will text you. Clearly he has many options and I’m definitely not his first.
basil67 Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 'I'm so hot that women only want to use me for sex' Hon, if this guy is real, this is a blatant humble brag. UGH 2
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 (edited) 9 minutes ago, Ajijo said: Reach out with a casual message: If a significant amount of time passes without any contact from him, consider sending a polite and casual message to check in. You can say something like, "Hey, just wanted to check if everything is okay. Looking forward to our call. Let me know when you're available." It’s now 7pm, should I send that message to him. Or should I send it tomorrow if he doesn’t text me by then. I do have another phone call with another guy who seems interested in me a lot more than him. He already confirmed we are talking at 9pm. I would stick to him but unfortunately he lives 4 hours away from me and it wouldn’t workout. Edited June 14, 2023 by GoodVibess
Author GoodVibess Posted June 14, 2023 Author Posted June 14, 2023 3 minutes ago, basil67 said: 'I'm so hot that women only want to use me for sex' Hon, if this guy is real, this is a blatant humble brag. UGH He is very muscular and can get any woman lol. 1 1
Alpacalia Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 3 hours ago, GoodVibess said: he said it himself, that many woman want to sleep with him but not take him seriously. Geez, that's really uncomfortable to read. That might be why women don't take him seriously. Generally speaking, it's poor conduct to bring up potential romantic or sexual partners you have had in the past when getting to know someone new. That goes double, for both of you. 1
basil67 Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 3 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: He is very muscular and can get any woman lol. Sure. But that doesn't excuse his awful humble brag. 1
stillafool Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 27 minutes ago, GoodVibess said: It’s now 7pm, should I send that message to him. NO. Why can't you wait until 10PM since that is the time he said? Also at 10PM don't call him but wait for him to contact you. You don't want to look desperate for him. You can talk to the other guy at 9PM as that will give you a hour to talk to him. 2
stillafool Posted June 14, 2023 Posted June 14, 2023 What time does this guy get off work? Why 10PM? If he doesn't call you, don't call him either. Just forget about it.
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