ArmanZ Posted April 11, 2023 Posted April 11, 2023 Hi guys here is my story: I just have to be a normal energetic person who study his university lesson carefully and try my best to achieve my goals in life but one day I don't know what happened that I sense something in myself something that tell me that one girl in my class is have a goal in her life and try her best to achieve it too and in fact I love this kind of girls so because I am super confident in myself I just try to open a conversation with her and chat with her. After some time I just realize that she is somehow shy towards guys and I just understand that chatting with a shy girl is the easiest way for them to have communication with others so after 4 months of talk and have funny moments together (I have super creative mind for jokes and funny things and I used it in a best way to make her laugh so we can have fun together) I just realized that she stares at me in the class most of the time and when I caught her staring at me she suddenly look somewhere else. also she laughs at most of my funny jokes in the chat. When I talk to her she can't hold her eye contact with me more than 10 seconds and after that she just play with their hand and mobile and etc. I believe these are might be a signals right?!! One day I just saw her chat message with my other guy friend in the class and she was friendly with him through the chat not that much friendly but a little bit informal verbs is used between those two and I just realize that I can change the direction with her in the chat so I decided to suddenly become a little bit friendly by just using informal verbs not that much though to seem really rushy and she just saw my message and didn't reply. Then I saw her not looking at me in the class and seem depressed and sad and after 24h of that message I just ask her "Is it something wrong there that I can be a help " and she said no and I just want her to let me know if there is anything wrong I did and she said "I just like the way you talk to me formally like before and I prefer that" and at that confuses me a lot because I don't know why she can talk a little bit friendly with my friend who has a girlfriend but with me she just want it formally (one thing my friend don't want to be with her and he told me that there is no need to worry because he said I act coldly in the past 3 months with her) what is the best thing to do right now?! I am just decided to tell her how I feel about her so maybe she say "Yes I like you too" but something tell inside of me that this is not the right moment because she is somehow angry with my actions and I just try to make things like before and after that I tell her how I feel but something tell me to show your feelings towards her right now even if she is angry to at least make the situation clearer to yourself. What do you suggest and tell about my situation?!! Did she likes me or I am just imagining things?!!
Wiseman2 Posted April 11, 2023 Posted April 11, 2023 24 minutes ago, ArmanZ said: what is the best thing to do right now?! I am just decided to tell her how I feel about her so maybe she say "Yes I like you too" If you are interested in dating her, the best thing to do is ask her to go do something one-on-one, like a date. An event, an outing, a refreshment, etc Joking around and chatting is fine but unless you ask her out, that's just acting like friends/classmates.
JTSW Posted April 11, 2023 Posted April 11, 2023 I think you took too long to make a move that she has now lost interest. She would now just rather be friends so you need to respect that.
Author ArmanZ Posted April 11, 2023 Author Posted April 11, 2023 13 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: If you are interested in dating her, the best thing to do is ask her to go do something one-on-one, like a date. An event, an outing, a refreshment, etc Joking around and chatting is fine but unless you ask her out, that's just acting like friends/classmates. I just want to do that but first I just want to know that based on what I said is there any possibilities that she may like me and I ruin the chance by talking friendly with her?!! In the next week I just want to tell her how I feel I have the courage to do that but in her current mood (she told my friend that she had a busy mind at the moment and somehow I believe that this maybe because of my chat) it is not good I believe that I should give her space.
Author ArmanZ Posted April 11, 2023 Author Posted April 11, 2023 3 hours ago, JTSW said: I think you took too long to make a move that she has now lost interest. She would now just rather be friends so you need to respect that. Thanks for the reply. You are right about it, my friend told me to make a move and I hesitated but I still have hope and if it is going to be just like that then I'll think about it.
JTSW Posted April 12, 2023 Posted April 12, 2023 16 hours ago, ArmanZ said: I still have hope On 4/11/2023 at 3:07 AM, ArmanZ said: she said "I just like the way you talk to me formally like before and I prefer that" I don't think there is hope OP. She has stated she prefers things to be formal between you.
Wiseman2 Posted April 12, 2023 Posted April 12, 2023 16 hours ago, ArmanZ said: In the next week I just want to tell her how I feel Just ask her out on a date. Telling her how you feel without asking her out is awkward and confusing. The best way to show your interest and intent is to ask her out. If you simply confess your feelings, what is she supposed to do with that?
Author ArmanZ Posted April 12, 2023 Author Posted April 12, 2023 (edited) Hi there, I used to know this girl in my class for 4 months. I have a good chat with her. I am the best student in the class in terms of mark that I get in the exams(I am not saying I am the best ) She is showing some signals which I believe is positive but I want to know how a shy girl act towards a guy that she likes or have a crush on?!! And then If I chat with her for 4 month should I tell her how I feel in order to break her shells and make the chat casual between us?!! In these 4 month I just make her laugh with my jokes and the post that I share with her so the atmosphere is good between us but should I tell her how I feel in order to create trust between us and just have a casual friendship and move forward?!! I need your help guys and girls specially shy girls in this world, I just need your full help on this in order to make a situation better for myself. Thanks in advance Edited April 12, 2023 by a LoveShack.org Moderator shorten title
stillafool Posted April 12, 2023 Posted April 12, 2023 Yes if she's the shy type and you know she likes you be assertive and tell her how you feel. Ask her out.
basil67 Posted April 12, 2023 Posted April 12, 2023 On 4/11/2023 at 12:07 PM, ArmanZ said: When I talk to her she can't hold her eye contact with me more than 10 seconds and after that she just play with their hand and mobile and etc. I believe these are might be a signals right?!! Yes, they are signals. Classic behaviour of someone who's shy. Or, she is uncomfortable with prolonged eye contact. Best to not make long eye contact if she doesn't like it. Regarding how she's changed in her behaviour towards you, I suspect it's because you changed your behaviour to her. She no longer knows who you are and possibly wonders if you're fake. At least she's requested that you go back to being who you used to be, so you know what to do when with her To your follow up question, as she's already asked you to go back to being more formal, it would seem that she prefers a more distant relationship with you
Author ArmanZ Posted April 13, 2023 Author Posted April 13, 2023 10 hours ago, basil67 said: Yes, they are signals. Classic behaviour of someone who's shy. Or, she is uncomfortable with prolonged eye contact. Best to not make long eye contact if she doesn't like it. Regarding how she's changed in her behaviour towards you, I suspect it's because you changed your behaviour to her. She no longer knows who you are and possibly wonders if you're fake. At least she's requested that you go back to being who you used to be, so you know what to do when with her To your follow up question, as she's already asked you to go back to being more formal, it would seem that she prefers a more distant relationship with you Means that she wants to ignore me completely when you mean distant relationship? you know I messed up in that because every time I chat with her my mind remind me of the fact that she is shy and you must talk to her with patience and you must have the patience to create a long-lasting relationship but at that moment I forgot that and I messed up. Screw me.
Author ArmanZ Posted April 13, 2023 Author Posted April 13, 2023 14 hours ago, stillafool said: Yes if she's the shy type and you know she likes you be assertive and tell her how you feel. Ask her out. Hope things work out and if not I have to move on, there is no way for me.
Measure Posted April 13, 2023 Posted April 13, 2023 As far as I'm concerned women know within the first 5 minutes whether or not they are intetested in someone. All we, as guys, can do by "talking" is screw it up, especially if we talk about ourselves. Four months is way too long to "talk" to a woman you want to "date". The first time you spoke to her was the time to ask her out. Especially if she is shy. If she's shy and engaging with you at all that means she's interested. You need to be assertive so there is no ambiguity. You dont have to "tell her" how you feel. The act of asking her out tells her how you feel.
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