JadeStar Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 Ok this is about my hubby, bless his heart I love him dearly but sheesh this gets on my nerves. First of all let me say its pretty much always been like this so its nothing new, but seems to have gotten worse. His b-day can roll around or even Christmas etc. I can get him gifts that he has asked for etc. but he always seems to act like that reguardless of what I get him (even things he asked for), he will take them back! He will act appreciative, but then later on I will find out that he has taken them back and either exchanged them, possibly for a different color or sometimes will exchange the whole item and buy something totally diffeerent than what I got even though it was something he asked for! I understand sometimes people will take things back because it may be the wrong size etc, but thats not even the case with him. I have gotten shirts/pants he has asked for even gotten the colors he may have wanted. Gotten certain tools he asked for just for him to take them back and get something differernt. Never have I taken back anything he has gotten for me.(maybe I should start doing that) I'm very appreciative of what he gets me wheather I asked for it or not. I like most anything. I'm not that picky. It just stresses me because its all the time with him with the things I have gotten. He says its not that hes not greatful, well then what the hell is it? Its not like I go out and get whatever, these are things he has asked for, right size/color/etc etc. A few months ago he asked me to pick him up some new workout shorts. He told me the kind etc. I asked him then, any paricular color? They are just workout shorts so it probably didn't matter, but figured I better check first. He says no any color is fine. I go out get him 2 pair cuz he already had some other ones. I got a black pair and a navy pair. He comes home, says he likes them they fit etc. A few days later I see a new pair of workout shorts. I noticed the navy ones I had gotten were gone. I asked him about it, he looked down at the floor and says, well I just wanted a different pair? WTF? I don't get it, I got what he asked for! He took the blue ones back and guess what? He got blue ones again but in a different shade! I saw the receit where he had exchanged them and everything. OK so heres my question after such a long post and maybe should have been in Personal rants LOL. Is it a good idea to just stop getting anything period? I was thinking for Christmas just getting him gift cards/certificates and saying here ya go get whatever you want? I feel like nothing I buy him is good enough. We have talked about it, he just kind of laughs and says the same ol thing, "I do like what you get me." Is he spolied? Just being difficult? Whats the deal? So everyone thinks I should just do the certificate thing? Maybe I should have been doing that all along, duh! Jade
whichwayisup Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 Start buying him gift certificates. Or actually go out with him to shop and you pay. Make a fun day of it, throw in a lunch etc... He's gone 'overboard' with the returning things. Yes, we all do it when it's the wrong colour, doesn't fit etc...But what I think he doesn't realize is the effort put in to get him the present. Does he know this? I'd be pissed off too actually if my hubby did what yours keeps doing. Here's a beef mine has done. I got him a gift certificate for 200 bucks at a clothing store for Xmas last year...Well, it's still sitting ontop on the shelf where he put it after he opened it! Can you believe that. I remind him and he says, Oh yeah, we should go one day...Piss me off, next time I will just hand him the cash. He has until Dec 12th to spend this money. Men... Anyway, I feel for ya and it's annoying just glad you're not real upset about it as I think it's just how your hubby is and there isn't any negative hidden messages behind his behaviour. Maybe he just likes to go get toys and things HE wants..lol.
slubberdegullion Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 Make a fun day of it, throw in a lunch etc... That may sound fun to a wife, but to most men (myself included), shopping is right up there with getting a root canal on the list of fun things to do. Men are hunters. We go with a target in mind, we get it, and we get out. Quicker is better. Women are browsers. They go to see what there is to see, wander about for a bit, have a snack, and maybe buy something if it piques their interest. Gift certs are probably the way to go, but make sure he knows the expiry date. Conversely, get him something that doesn't require shopping. Tickets to a hockey game or something like that.
Author JadeStar Posted November 5, 2005 Author Posted November 5, 2005 Yep gift certificates may be what he gets. You know I have often wondered if this stems from childhood. He is the youngest of 3 and he is the only boy. I remember when we were dating his mother would buy him whatever he wanted. Noitce I said wanted not really needed. Yes we all like to get what our children ask for if we can, but his mother would buy him many expensive things. So he has high taste for certain things. Theres nothing wrong with that, but personally I don't see paying almost 20 dollars for ONE pair of underwear:rolleyes: I do know that, when others have gotten him things for his b-day or Christmas, he doesn't take those things back. So gee must be just me. I have asked him before why it is he takes my things back I get him but no one elses, he doesn't seem to have an answer for that, hmm? Oh well, yes I believe that certificates are the way to go, and that way he can get whatever he wants/needs and I wont have to worry about him taking my things I get back. I guess if he starts taking his own things back he gets for himself, then we got a real problem. Jade
whichwayisup Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 That may sound fun to a wife, but to most men (myself included), shopping is right up there with getting a root canal on the list of fun things to do. OK, I am not the typical female here. I absolutely HATE HATE HATE shopping. My husband doesn't mind it so for me to actually go with him, he knows I'm only doing it to make him happy...Lunch is lunch though. He has to drag me out by the ear kicking and screaming...Trust me, sometimes shopping is such a chore it puts me in a mood! Men are hunters. We go with a target in mind, we get it, and we get out. Quicker is better. Women are browsers. They go to see what there is to see, wander about for a bit, have a snack, and maybe buy something if it piques their interest. I'm in and out too. (God, that sounds so dirty!) He is the one who browses and loves to doddle. Like a child! Pisses me off actually! Gift certs are probably the way to go, but make sure he knows the expiry date He knows, he's just lazy. That is something I'm well aware of. But once he gets in the mood to shop, watch out!! Conversely, get him something that doesn't require shopping. Tickets to a hockey game or something like that. SCORE! And another SCORE will happen between the sheets! I got hockey tickets 2 years ago, that was the best gift ever! (Yes, I brought my hubby...) I guess if he starts taking his own things back he gets for himself, then we got a real problem. LOL! That is when you book him on OPRAH! LOL!
Author JadeStar Posted November 5, 2005 Author Posted November 5, 2005 Actually hubby likes going shopping. My dad is the same way he could shop all day long! We go and look at things together and sometimes we will split up and he will go the mens department and I to the womens. Its pretty fun, and I guess if b-day or Christmas rolls around we can go shopping together and I'll let him pick out what he wants and I'll buy it for him. I guess it hurts my feelings more than it pisses me off. On Christmas or b-days its fun to watch him open gifts, (even ones he asked for) but then to turn around and take it back is just kind of like a slap in the face I guess. I got to the point where I stopped worrying about it or letting it get to me infront of him because it seemed to not really matter. I told him last time I got him something and he took it back that from now on he could go get his on sh*t. Jade
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