Donarudo88 Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 Don't wanna get too into the relationship I'm currently in... but basically i noticed a few things about this girl i'm talkin to some that r good and bad. She's really quiet over the phone and seems to keep things to herself. I'm a happy go lucky guy and always joke around and she seems to like that. But to get to my point... after a conversation (possibly about an hr long) i get off the phone like "well she only spoke to me for like 10 mins last week, so things must be progressing." Now i'm realizing that she doesn't call me unless i call her. She once told me she was going to supposedly "call me, but ended up getting occupied" when i asked her why i haven't heard from her. But i have never seen any attempt of communication coming from her. we've only been talkin for like 3 and a 1/2 weeks, and she isn't really open so i know i'll have to adapt to that for now. I always think positive so i'm not too worried since I DID get her number I basically wanna know if i should worry about her not calling me and me having to call her all the time. by the matter of fact i was suppose to go on a date w/ her tomorrow and she said she doesn't know where she wants to go and everything i suggested didn't cut it. Her exact words "i'll call you later and let you know what i wanna do." That was 3 hours ago... and i don't know if i should even bother calling her tomorrow to see if she's really interested in going on the date or if she will pretend as if she forgot. Any thoughts or suggestions are appreciated. BTW i'm 17.
J dub Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 Youre in a relationship...and youre talking to someone else? Funny, suddenly all my suggestions and insight just went out the window.
Gottabestrong Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 I think he meant he was in a relationship with the girl he is talking to. I am a lot older than you (29) but I think the fact that she does not call you is not a bad sign in itself, as you guys have only been talking for about 3 weeks. She might try to play hard to get or keep her defenses up. I think a much better sign to gauge whether she is interested or not, is how she reacts when you do call her. Does she seem happy to talk to you, does she joke, flirt, laugh,... If she does not call you back and suggest a place and time to meet, than I am afraid she does not sound too excited about you.
Author Donarudo88 Posted November 5, 2005 Author Posted November 5, 2005 First to further clarify what I meant by "relationship..." No, I'm not in another relationship, I just couldn't think of a word to use for where me and this girl im talkin to stands so I just said relationship. But no, i'm not in another relationship. And I was going to see if she calls me today interested in going out, and if she doesn't then it's her lost. Sounds like that's what I was going to do anyways, thanks for the 2nd opinion.
Sweets1919 Posted November 5, 2005 Posted November 5, 2005 As I read your post I took it totally different and could see both sides. Us females have been inundated with supposed advice books recently....in particular that "He's just not that into you" book which supposedly revolutionized how women (girls) determine if a guy likes them or not. One of the main things in this book (as well as that "Rules" book) is that the male is supposecd to do the pursuing (calling) and that the woman is supposed to be responsive to his gestures. The fact that she talks on the phone to you and for up to an hour shows interest...she wants to get to know you more. Also, she wants to go out with you. Maybe this is a bit of courting...after all it's been three weeks, not three years, and it is nice to know that a guy is interested and wants to make some plans and put in an effort. If she just takes takes takes 100% from you then of course that is not good. But if it is just that you are doing most (all) of the calling and that is the only real problem, I'd say take a bit more time and don't write her off yet. Girls are given so much advice (call, don't call, don't be too available, call once in a while, don't be demanding, tell him how you feel, don't kiss him first etc) that it is very had to determine what to really do!! Good luck.
Author Donarudo88 Posted November 6, 2005 Author Posted November 6, 2005 As I read your post I took it totally different and could see both sides. Us females have been inundated with supposed advice books recently....in particular that "He's just not that into you" book which supposedly revolutionized how women (girls) determine if a guy likes them or not. One of the main things in this book (as well as that "Rules" book) is that the male is supposecd to do the pursuing (calling) and that the woman is supposed to be responsive to his gestures. The fact that she talks on the phone to you and for up to an hour shows interest...she wants to get to know you more. Also, she wants to go out with you. Maybe this is a bit of courting...after all it's been three weeks, not three years, and it is nice to know that a guy is interested and wants to make some plans and put in an effort. If she just takes takes takes 100% from you then of course that is not good. But if it is just that you are doing most (all) of the calling and that is the only real problem, I'd say take a bit more time and don't write her off yet. Girls are given so much advice (call, don't call, don't be too available, call once in a while, don't be demanding, tell him how you feel, don't kiss him first etc) that it is very had to determine what to really do!! Good luck. Everything you said sounded so in place and on point. She actually called me a few hours ago and told me she was willing to go on the date "tonight" as in tonight... and it was around 7 pm when she called me. She told me she didn't call me the previous night because she had a migraine and didn't feel like talking. This may be BS but I still have that thought in the back of my mind saying "atleast she didn't flat out say she forgot or she didn't wanna talk bout it then." When a girl gives you BS i think it's good because they don't wanna dissapoint you so they give u a "white lie" at times. Anyways I ended up not going on the date since she called on such short notice and I was no longer in the mood to go anywhere, but she totally understood considering the fact that she realized she kinda called late and couldn't make up her mind the previous night on where she wanted to go so that was still a debatable topic late into the night. We planned on going on another date this Thusday since it's veteran's day and we both have no school. Hopefully all turns out well. Thanks for the posts... REALLY appreciate it. Night all!
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