Author RuralProblems Posted November 6, 2005 Author Posted November 6, 2005 She could have a pay as you go cell phone, no records there. Google spy equipment, you'll find a bunch of sites that sell the stuff you might be looking for. Just don't buy it in a way that your wife might find out what you are doing. Good luck, stay cool, collect the evidence and make sure it's going to stick before making your wife aware of it. If she's got a pay as you go cell phone, she's hiding it well Certainly a possibility to consider, though. There are two curious cell phone numbers from the area where the "meetings" are happening. Maybe I should get a friend to accidentally call those numbers to see what info they can get. I don't know if I should do it, being it could be someone I know - my voice is very recognizable. Thanks!
jonesgirly Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 You can disable caller id on your phone by dialing *67 before making a call. Call later in the evening or early in the morning when you are more likely to get the other parties' voice mail (you can call from any phone after dialing *67 before the number) - most of the time people set up their own voicemail messages.
Author RuralProblems Posted November 6, 2005 Author Posted November 6, 2005 If W has treated you disrespectfully in public, it seems that you need to tighten that up. Getting Respect from W is a first priority, because that is necessary to end the affair. That's just the thing - I don't want / need to end the affair. I'm done. What habits does W have that you feel are disrepectful? What habits do you have that are less than fully respectful? What habits can you offer to change? ... Any cycles of disrepect you can share? Well. Hmm. Everyone who knows me knows that I'm about the easiest person in the world to get along with. My faults? I'm not obsessed with sex whatsoever - virgin until I married her at 27. I bowl once a week, about 2/3 of the year. I play pool one night a week 14 weeks out of the year. I expect her to work at least 2 hours a day at cleaning the house, that doesn't happen, and I don't even mention it that much - enough that she should get the hint, not enough to pi$$ her off. I'm somewhat of a perfectionist, but only about stuff I do. I always compliment her on dinner (she does 80% of the work on that, I do breakfast and lunches for everyone). She's a good cook. I don't rag on her about anything except wasting money (leaving the door open on the heated garage when it's below 0 outside, leaving milk out during meals which I solved by putting it away myself). Hey, my mother-in-law and father-in-law (when he was alive) loved me. Can anyone point to anything I do to disrespect her? Really minor things - nothing at all major. I'm really trying here. She spends about $200 a month on psychic/witchcraft/mystic crap, and I only make a sarcastic comment about it every other month or so ("$20 for a rock (crystal)?" - she bought one for herself and the two boys for $60 - ouch). I know plenty of people think they're perfect when they're not, but everyone in her family (brother, aunts, etc) think I'm the best thing that's happened to her. I really tried. The marriage was fine until the kids were born, then she turned into the bitch from hell. Parenting lessons? We're doing good except for the self-esteem which is in the toilet. I work on that when she's not around. In fact, I look forward to the time she's gone so I can work with them. Did I bring this on (the affair, that is)? Hmmm - yes. If you think an affair is ever excusable. BUT and I do mean BUT, my inatentiveness is her fault (g-d, do I sound one sided? Yes). She treated me like sh*t for many years before I just had to back off and say "whatever" to our relationship. Staying together for the kids? That was my plan until this happened. End of vent. I hope I don't sound like an a**h***. I'm not. But everyone around me seems to think I'm just TOO DAMNED NICE (that I will admit to). I'm easy going to a fault. I don't want to make this work. I want a two sided relationship next time around, and she's done everything she can to prove that she is incapable of doing that.
Author RuralProblems Posted November 6, 2005 Author Posted November 6, 2005 You can disable caller id on your phone by dialing *67 before making a call. Call later in the evening or early in the morning when you are more likely to get the other parties' voice mail (you can call from any phone after dialing *67 before the number) - most of the time people set up their own voicemail messages. Oh - jeez - great suggestion. I didn't think of that, being we don't have voice mail on our phones. I would have blocked the caller ID, but I didn't think I'd find out anything useful unless someone answered [slapping my forehead]... Dooh! (again)
Craig Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 Check out http://www.theultimates.com/white/ to do a reverse search on the phone numbers. If they are unlisted or cell phones you'll have to pay to find out who owns the numbers.
Aquarius Guy Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 Dear Rural, You are not pointing out the levers of power available to you, in the marriage. I would suggest buying new underwear for her, so the proof is not able to be refuted. Only new, unused underwear in her underwear drawer. Have the new underwear certified and marked by the lab. Then place the marekd underwear in her underwear drawer. Work with a lab, that will give you a report that can be used in court. Ask a lawyer what labs are recognized by courts. I wash my wife's underwear and put it in the drawer. Sometimes I feel sticky stuff on her crotch hairs. Maybe I should be saving my wife's underwear for the lab. The woman is running down your son's self esteem. You are not going to stop visitation. She will have them for weekends and weeks in the summer and Christmas and spring break. W will continue to undermine your authority and efforts. Divorce and the courts are no match for her undermining your best efforts. I caution you about lawyers, because Lawyers are set up for divorce, fast. I am posting to you about considering/managing a reconcilation. Your wife is disrespectul to you, because she believes she has power over you. Do you own the house together where you live? What power plays do you have? Power turns a woman on. How can you demonstrate power? You have not posted your list of things that she has asked for that you do and don't do for her. I suggest you set a parenting course, as a target, because your wife needs therapy. Parenting coures have a lot of therapy. POWER: You have unlimited power. Maybe you don't believe in Witchcraft, but she does. You are a nice guy. But your son's are in the balance. You need to apply whatever threats of legal retribution it takes, as a threat to get W into therapy. I hereby invest in you all magical powers. If you need some spells, ask her Mystic friends. $100 to $1000 is probably all you need to spend to straighten out W. If you don't go to therapy, I will need to have a spell cast for_____: http://www.mysticwicks.com I asked you for your phrases. You need to have smooth phrases handy. I would prefer you show me more respect. I request that you speak to our sons in a polite manner. If you feel our sons need to be yelled at, please talk to me first. You find it easier to do houehold chores and be more respectful to your family. Your continuing to scream at me needs to be done outside the house, where our sons will be less exposed to learning disrespect for authority figures. Blessings
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