jen78nc Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Hi all. Well, I just saw another email that my husband sent to his "friend." He told her that we are going down to visit my family, where she happens to live, and he would definitely like for she and him to get together and find a hot tub and some beer, and then he said LOL. I dont think this was really a joke. He is definitely wanting to have a physical affair with her isnt he??
LucreziaBorgia Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Jen, I know this isn't easy for you to hear but whether or not your husband has actually had a PA is beside the point. The sad fact is that he wants to have one with this woman he is already deeply involved in an EA with. After reading your posts here and at SI I can tell you the chances that he has already had a PA with her are very high. Would it really matter though, or make any difference if his penis actually entered her body or not? Whether or not it happened will not change the fact that he wants it to. It is time to make some serious moves here. He has GOT to stop contact with this woman. Period. Your marriage does not have a chance otherwise. He is continuing this, because he CAN. Because he gets away with it. Because your fear of losing him outweighs your fear of doing what is right for YOU and for your marriage. A change will not happen until something drastic happens. Something that shows him that there are consequences for his actions with this woman. If you want him to make a choice, give him a choice to make: Go see a lawyer, and take copies of your emails. Get some legal advice on your situation. Find out what your rights are, and your protections. Have the necessary papers drawn up for a legal separation/divorce. When you get home, let your husband know he has a choice: He stops communication with this OW, and goes to MC to help you salvage this marriage - or, you will divorce him. Solid choice. No middle ground. Staying married to you, means saying goodbye to her. Refusing to say goodbye to her, means divorcing you and never being a part of your life again. You have to be strong enough to follow through. If you are not, consider some IC until you have your feet under you and you are ready for the fallout. He will not be happy with this, but it is the only thing that will shake him right now.
a4a Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Jen you need to be documenting all of this BS...... Keep it in a safe place, not in your home. a4a
Craig Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Jen you need to be documenting all of this BS...... Keep it in a safe place, not in your home. a4aAnd make at least one backup copy and keep that in a separate location, again not in your home.
Zaira Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 I haven't seen your other posts about this situation, but I am assuming you have confronted him about it? He says they are just friends? He doesn't respect you enough to cut all contact with her? I think you're better off without him, unless he's willing to stop acting like a complete dimwit and get his marriage back on track.
Recommended Posts