TheDiva Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 My 5 year old got his glasses today. When we found out that he needed glasses he was really excited. Alot of people in our family wear them, and it didn't seem to bother him then. But now he is very scared that others are going to laugh at him, and he is resisting wearing them. He did calm down this afternoon when my oldest nephew told my son that he looked "Really Cool". He looks up to him, so I am hoping it will have a lasting effect, but I can't fool myself for long. I know tomorrow at school it will start all over again. Does anyone have any tips or tricks to get the transition to wearing glasses easier? And getting over the fear of others making fun of him? HELP!
Outcast Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 It's never too soon to teach someone that the opinions of others are just that - their opinions - and that he should not allow them to affect how he thinks about himself. Explain that kids who laugh just don't understand because they're still very young and that he should forgive them for being soo foolish. You can also tell him that only stupid people are mean, but only if you're sure he won't then call them 'stupid' to their faces and get the tar beaten out of himself.
Author TheDiva Posted November 1, 2005 Author Posted November 1, 2005 Thanks Outcast I was very tired last night and trying to be quick, so I forgot to mention one thing. My son is PDD/ASD. More specifically he was diagnosed with Aspergers Sydrome. He is in a regular school and class. He has never worried about being laughed at before, it just astounded me. In all his testings his anxiety was the lowest score, so for him to be anxious about being laughed at all of the sudden has me confused. I have always stressed what others think of him is not important. Since he started school, he has realized that he is very different from others his age. The school officials do not like to help. They want to reclassify him as ADD/ADHD. I am tired of having to educate them. It seems that his teacher sometimes just doesn't want to have to deal with him. Different rant altogether sorry) His treatments seem to be working quite well for him, he is attempting to make friends and for lack of better term "fit in" with his classmates. He just doesn't know "how" to interact properly so he is easily frustrated when others don't "get" him. He is quite literal and I am beginning to wonder if maybe he has been laughed at for taking directions at school in a literal sense. I know I should have put this is the first post. But I was tired as I said. I don't wear glasses myself and so I can't easily understand the anxiety behind it. And I also don't know how to get him to stop grabbing them by the lenses. We have already cleaned them for him a dozen times or so, but some of that could be the repetitiveness of his AS. Making them dirty just so he can watch them being cleaned. As for stupid, Yes he will call someone stupid if I tell him that, so I don't think I will... but I guess I should warn him to take the glasses off before fighting:laugh:
Hot Coco Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Hey Diva, let us know how it went with your son today at school. Also any time you want to rant/vent about school/teachers let me know. I'm right there with you! My son's teacher last year tried to push that damn diagnoses on him and I laughed in her face. She wouldn't stop bringing it up and gave me specific examples of how the drugs helped other children...yeah, right. More like it made her job easier. Oh, don't even get me started on that! Anyway, let us know how he fared. I hope it goes well!
933KJL Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 I have found (three kids--two with glasses) that the days of the schoolyard bully are almost gone. Maybe it is the proliference of computers, but there are many more children today with glasses (and braces) that it almost has become the norm. My son (14 now and had glasses since 2) only had one experience with a kid calling him names. When he ignored the kid and did not even acknowledge him, the problem was solved. My daughter (8 now and got glasses at age 6) has never been teased. Maybe it iis medical technology that has brought the issue out in the open and there are more options available. Back in my day, we used to razz the kids about four-eyes and tinsel teeth. I just don't see it any longer-- Please let us know how the little dude makes out!
glittergurl Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Oh, he shouldn't be afraid! I've heard about kids in my area who find glasses so cool now, because of this whole Harry Potter trend. I guess it depends on the kids at his school; when I was little, no one ever made fun of kids who wore glasses. Why would they? As long as you pick a nice pair that suit his face nicely.
Moai Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Kids are going to pick on each other for any reason, whether it's glasses or braces or being chubby or skinny or tall or whatever. It's the way kids are. All you can do is let him know as best you can that nobody is perfect, and that other's opinion isn't as important as his opinion of himself. Or, in the case, being able to SEE!
glittergurl Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 I think you should compliment him about it. If his self esteem is boosted to the max, other children's opinions won't even bother him.
Art_Critic Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 I have been wearing glasses since I was 6.. The transition was easy for me becasue I could see better.. But all the kids had an issue with the thickness of the glasses.. They called me coke bottle eyes.. and made jokes about frying ants with them.. Today I wear contacts and my glasses are made of High Indexed plastic which makes the lens thin.. I wished they had that technology when I was young.. I think 933 makes a vaild point about the fact that so many kids wear glasses today.. Even Bullies It also used to help me to pick out my own glasses and not let my parents do it..
Author TheDiva Posted November 1, 2005 Author Posted November 1, 2005 Hey Diva, let us know how it went with your son today at school. Also any time you want to rant/vent about school/teachers let me know. I'm right there with you! My son's teacher last year tried to push that damn diagnoses on him and I laughed in her face. She wouldn't stop bringing it up and gave me specific examples of how the drugs helped other children...yeah, right. More like it made her job easier. Oh, don't even get me started on that! Anyway, let us know how he fared. I hope it goes well! It is a trend these days, they did this to my nephews as well, who were put on meds. One I think did/does have ADHD, the other shows no signs of (to me) of ADD. Maybe this is just in NC schools? I got the impression that sons teacher just wanted her job to be easier. But nope my son does not fit the profile for ADHD/ADD he was tested for it along with all kinds of other stuff, and the diagnoses was PDD-AS so she can go jump off a bridge I am not turning him into a medicated zombie to make her life easier. I will come back after school to post an update. I have found (three kids--two with glasses) that the days of the schoolyard bully are almost gone. Maybe it is the proliference of computers, but there are many more children today with glasses (and braces) that it almost has become the norm. My son (14 now and had glasses since 2) only had one experience with a kid calling him names. When he ignored the kid and did not even acknowledge him, the problem was solved. My daughter (8 now and got glasses at age 6) has never been teased. Maybe it iis medical technology that has brought the issue out in the open and there are more options available. Back in my day, we used to razz the kids about four-eyes and tinsel teeth. I just don't see it any longer-- Please let us know how the little dude makes out! That is a relief. I can't remember if he has other kids in his class that wear them or not. I think I saw one little girl at the open house, but I am not sure if she was in his class or a sibling of one of his classmates. When I questioned him about who in his class wears glasses he said nobody. I am sure there has to be another out of 23 kids! I only picked on one person for wearing glasses, but it wasn't a schoolmate. It was my sister:rolleyes: and she quit wearing them for being picked on. Oh, he shouldn't be afraid! I've heard about kids in my area who find glasses so cool now, because of this whole Harry Potter trend. I guess it depends on the kids at his school; when I was little, no one ever made fun of kids who wore glasses. Why would they? As long as you pick a nice pair that suit his face nicely. It's kind of funny, you should mention Harry Potter. The woman that fitted his glasses told him that, then while we were collecting candy a store clerk told him he should have been Harry Potter for Halloween. His grandmother also said he looks like HP. But he is 5 years old. He don't have much interest in the HP series so he really don't know who Harry is! His ego did get a boost this morning, when he got on the bus the driver said "Wow, you got glasses! You look really great." he looked away and mumbled a thank you, and went to sit down. ( the looking away is part of AS, he has major trouble with eye contact) But when he got to his seat and waved at me he had a huge smile on his face:D Moai- I know kids will always find a reason to pick. It just saddens me that he already had one strike against him, and now he has another. I personally think he looks cute. I am not biased promise! He hasn't yet realized he can see better, somehow he passed eye exams before he entered school. I do know his eyes didn't just go to 80/20® 100/20 (L) overnight so there is no telling how long he has been overworking himself to see right. I have been wearing glasses since I was 6.. The transition was easy for me becasue I could see better.. But all the kids had an issue with the thickness of the glasses.. They called me coke bottle eyes.. and made jokes about frying ants with them.. Today I wear contacts and my glasses are made of High Indexed plastic which makes the lens thin.. I wished they had that technology when I was young.. I think 933 makes a vaild point about the fact that so many kids wear glasses today.. Even Bullies It also used to help me to pick out my own glasses and not let my parents do it.. So I guess we are starting out on the right foot (maybe EYE would be a better term) He did pick the frames out, he wasn't given many choices, but he did have the choice. When he picked them he thought he could take them home but was disappointed that he couldn't. Then he complained that they didn't have "windows" in them. I really admire anyone who can wear contacts. I can't stand anything near my eyes. I had a friend talk me into trying out one of those color changing contacts. WOW that was an experience! Took me about 45 minutes to get it in, and I couldn't stand the way it felt (it was a hard lens) so I jerked it back out. My eyes didn't stop watering for hours, all I had to do was think about it! If I ever need glasses that will be it GLASSES for me:cool: I don't care who makes fun of me:laugh: I will come back and update after school. I am hopeful after all the positive feedback he got that maybe it won't be too much of a problem for him.
Author TheDiva Posted November 1, 2005 Author Posted November 1, 2005 I don't have to wait. The school just called, he has popped a lens out. I was told that it should be fixable. He seems to have breezed through the day. He was pretty proud of them, and the kids were more curious then mean. So I was just paranoid for nothing I guess. We will see what he says when he gets home.
933KJL Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 LOL my son took a fall the first day and put a huge gouge in his lens--needed to replace them at $200 a pop. Big old thick lenses. I think because they probably have seen so poorly for a long time, it takes time to adjust to good vision and your perception is off! He will be fine! Glad to hear it, pop his lens back in and let him eat candy from Halloween! PS I quickly scanned your message and thought it said. "I don't need to wait, he got popped at school" and I was like OMFG
Author TheDiva Posted November 1, 2005 Author Posted November 1, 2005 LOL my son took a fall the first day and put a huge gouge in his lens--needed to replace them at $200 a pop. Big old thick lenses. I think because they probably have seen so poorly for a long time, it takes time to adjust to good vision and your perception is off! He will be fine! Glad to hear it, pop his lens back in and let him eat candy from Halloween! PS I quickly scanned your message and thought it said. "I don't need to wait, he got popped at school" and I was like OMFG That's too funny. It does bring up a good point though! Should I consider getting him a replacement pair? They will cost a couple of pretty pennies, but he is very clumsy and add to the adjustment of being able to see prehaps it would be worth it. Aside from that we had to wait a month to get his in! How many times between exams do your two break their glasses?
933KJL Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 We used to do exams and glasses each year. Now the prescriptions seem to change every other year. I would hold on till he gets a good bend or a scratch. He can wear them till you replace them and then keep the busted ones for a backup. Then just keep the older pair as a backup when you replace them as he grows. I would say that we have broken maybe 3 pairs in a big way. As he gets used to it and older he will care for them more
Recommended Posts