scobro Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 I have been doing no contact for 3 weeks now and delete e-mails etc but I find myself feeling worse not better.I am back to the stage of pain in my stomach and major feelings of aloness.I am missing her it's like no contact put me behind a step not forward is this just the withdrawal effects coming back?any advice would be appreciated...........Im hurting now right when things were going good why????
slubberdegullion Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Scobro; It's supposed to hurt, so in a sense it's actually a positive thing that you're experiencing these feelings. It's all part of the healing process. Oddly, you will likely find that it's going to get worse before it gets better. Sooner or later, you'll bottom out and you'll wonder if it can possibly get any worse. But stay strong and keep up the good work, because the hardest part of the mountain to climb is the last little distance.
Author scobro Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Scobro; It's supposed to hurt, so in a sense it's actually a positive thing that you're experiencing these feelings. It's all part of the healing process. Oddly, you will likely find that it's going to get worse before it gets better. Sooner or later, you'll bottom out and you'll wonder if it can possibly get any worse. But stay strong and keep up the good work, because the hardest part of the mountain to climb is the last little distance. how long did it take you?I have been feeling like this for 3 months now.
slubberdegullion Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Well, I've been down this road a couple of times, so it's a bit dependent on the actual one. My first break-up (instigated by her) had me in a funk for, oh, maybe 6 months. After that, I started to come out of my shell and re-enter the world. The worst break-up I ever had (again, instigated by her) had me down and out for just under a year, but after that I felt much better about myself because I had a sense of being "tempered in the fire of loss." I've had a few FWB relationships go sour, so I ended them pretty quickly, and it took, oh, hours to get back to normal. Point is that regardless of how long it takes, there will be an end to it, you will feel better, and it will make you stronger.
kitten chick Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 It takes 8 weeks to break a habit, scobro, you have 5 left.
brooke7777 Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 I am still going through the ups and downs of NC. It's so frustrating...one day I think I'm doing ok and the next I feel like crawling in a cave and never coming out. I broke NC about a week and a half ago and it opened my mind up to 10,000 more unanswered questions. Plus, it's only made me long for more contact, which I know may be giving me false hopes, so I've decided to back off and stick to NC...I'm still way too vulnerable. I think that everyone heals differently and at a different pace. I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with this man and the break up seemingly came out of nowhere...at least in my mind. I think this one is going to take quite a while for me to shake off. Stay strong and stick to NC...focus on yourself and finding out who you are right now.
off2sea Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 I agree, the ups and downs take a real toll on your well being. I'm almost at the year mark with just scattered meaningless txt messages that come every 2-3 months. This past weekend I had almost an overwhelming desire to send a message and kept turning my phone off so I wouldn't. Not sure what precipitated the urge for contact but I was able to fight it off. It's important to recognize these "bumps" as slight detours in the process. I hope this passes quickly...
grace2005 Posted November 1, 2005 Posted November 1, 2005 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t54435/ This is the thread about the lost guide to the no contact policy by lost_in_chicgo . I found it helpful. There are 4 versions to this. This thread is version 4. Let me know what you all think for those of you who haven't read it.
Recommended Posts